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How important is abstinence in fully realizing the absolute?


I know from personal experience the loss of semen leaves me feeling depressed and brings me to a very low frequency ( i even get cold feet).


Yet, I have read that suppressing sexual urges can be unhealthy and bad for the system. Is this true?


Are there techniques necessary for one to abstain in a healthy fashion?


Any opinions, ideas, exercises, techniques?

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In the initial phase of the spiritual life complete sexual abstinence may not be critical. A regulated householder life is appropriate for 99.9% of all devotees and may actually teach you more about renunciation than you imagine. However, in the very advanced phase of spiritual life complete abstinence is truly essential. Usually that coincides with us getting old, and with our bodily urges diminishing, thus making that abstinence much easier.


The main thing in controlling your senses is avoiding contemplation of the objects of the senses. In other words: avoiding the temptation.

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I've been doing a few practices to help with dealing with sexual lust.

First one must understand the differneces between Beauty / Handsomeness and what lust truely is.. When the opposite sex looks at another and finds them attractive they tend to becoem aroused. One simple practice for a man for example is to look at a flower and contemplate beauty then look at say a beautiful woman in a bikini and recognizing that it's beauty you see. Try to seperate Lust from Beauty. Some people even tend to mistake love for lust.

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Some people even tend to mistake love for lust.


haha, some people? I would say most people ;)


I'm very guilty of this myself.


Re. abstinence - I agree with one of the other posters - as you progress the more critical it becomes. However I don't think that is the end.



Yet, I have read that suppressing sexual urges can be unhealthy and bad for the system. Is this true?


IMHO I don't think resistance unhealthy for your physical body, but might be unhealthy for your mind. And an unhealthy mind = unhealthy body. If you want to resist the urge a change in mind is required. Tirisilex put forward a nice method.

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sa tvam vicaksya mrga-cestitam atmano 'ntas

cittam niyaccha hrdi karna-dhunim ca citte

jahy anganasramam asattama-yutha-gatham

prinihi hamsa-saranam virama kramena




sah--that very person; tvam--you; vicaksya--considering; mrga-cestitam--the activities of the deer; atmanah--of the self; antah--within; cittam--consciousness; niyaccha--fix; hrdi--in the heart; karna-dhunim--aural reception; ca--and; citte--unto the consciousness; jahi--give up; angana-asramam--household life; asat-tama--most abominable; yutha-gatham--full of stories of man and woman; prinihi--just accept; hamsa-saranam--the shelter of the liberated souls; virama--become detached; kramena--gradually.




My dear King, just try to understand the allegorical position of the deer. Be fully conscious of yourself, and give up the pleasure of hearing about promotion to heavenly planets by fruitive activity. Give up household life, which is full of sex, as well as stories about such things, and take shelter of the Supreme Personality of Godhead through the mercy of the liberated souls. In this way, please give up your attraction for material existence.




In one of his songs, Srila Narottama dasa Thakura writes:


karma-kanda, jnana-kanda, kevala visera bhanda,

amrta baliya yeba khaya

nana yoni sada phire, kadarya bhaksana kare,

tara janma adhah-pate yaya


"Fruitive activities and mental speculation are simply cups of poison. Whoever drinks of them, thinking them to be nectar, must struggle very hard, life after life, in different types of bodies. Such a person eats all kinds of nonsense and becomes condemned by his activities of so-called sense enjoyment."

People are generally enamored of the fruitive results of worldly activity and mental speculation. They generally desire to be promoted to heavenly planets, merge into the existence of Brahman, or keep themselves in the midst of family life, enchanted by the pleasures of the tongue and genitals. The great sage Narada clearly instructs King Barhisman not to remain his entire life in the grhastha-asrama. Being in the grhastha-asrama means being under the control of one's wife. One has to give up all this and put himself into the asrama of the paramahamsa, that is, put himself under the control of the spiritual master. The paramahamsa-asrama is the asrama of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, under whom the spiritual master has taken shelter. The symptoms of the bona fide spiritual master are stated in Srimad-Bhagavatam (11.3.21):


tasmad gurum prapadyeta

jijnasuh sreya uttamam

sabde pare ca nisnatam

brahmany upasamasrayam


"Any person who is seriously desirous of achieving real happiness must seek out a bona fide spiritual master and take shelter of him by initiation. The qualification of a spiritual master is that he must have realized the conclusion of the scriptures by deliberation and arguments and thus be able to convince others of these conclusions. Such great personalities, who have taken complete shelter of the Supreme Godhead, leaving aside all material considerations, are to be understood as bona fide spiritual masters."

A paramahamsa is one who has taken shelter of the Parabrahman, the Supreme Personality of Godhead. :smash:If one takes shelter of the paramahamsa spiritual master, gradually, through training and instruction, he will become detached from worldly life and ultimately return home, back to Godhead. The particular mention of anganasramam asattama-yutha-gatham is very interesting. The whole world is in the clutches of maya, being controlled by woman. Not only is one controlled by the woman who is one's wife, but one is also controlled by so many sex literatures. That is the cause of one's being entangled in the material world. One cannot give up this abominable association through one's own effort, but if one takes shelter of a bona fide spiritual master who is a paramahamsa, he will gradually be elevated to the platform of spiritual life.:deal::pray:

The pleasing words of the Vedas that inspire one to elevate oneself to the heavenly planets or merge into the existence of the Supreme are for the less intelligent who are described in Bhagavad-gita as mayayapahrta jnanah (those whose knowledge is taken away by the illusory energy). Real knowledge means understanding the miserable condition of material life. One should take shelter of a bona fide liberated soul, the spiritual master, and gradually elevate himself to the spiritual platform and thus become detached from the material world. According to Srila Visvanatha Cakravarti Thakura, hamsa-saranam refers to the cottage in which saintly persons live. Generally a saintly person lives in a remote place in the forest or in a humble cottage. However, we should note that the times have changed. It may be beneficial for a saintly person's own interest to go to the forest and live in a cottage, but if one becomes a preacher, especially in Western countries, he has to invite many classes of men who are accustomed to living in comfortable apartments. Therefore in this age a saintly person has to make proper arrangements to receive people and attract them to the message of Krsna consciousness. Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura, perhaps for the first time, introduced motorcars and palatial buildings for the residence of saintly persons just to attract the general public in big cities. The main fact is that one has to associate with a saintly person. In this age people are not going to search out a saint in the forest, so the saints and sages have to come to the big cities to make arrangements to receive the people in general, who are accustomed to the modern amenities of material life. Gradually such persons will learn that palatial buildings or comfortable apartments are not at all necessary. The real necessity is to become free from material bondage in whatever way possible. According to the orders of Srila Rupa Gosvami:


anasaktasya visayan

yatharham upayunjatah

nirbandhah krsna-sambandhe

yuktam vairagyam ucyate


"When one is not attached to anything, but at the same time accepts everything in relation to Krsna, one is rightly situated above possessiveness." (Bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu 1.2.255)

One should not be attached to material opulence, but material opulence may be accepted in the Krsna consciousness movement to facilitate the propagation of the movement. In other words, material opulence may be accepted as yukta-vairagya, that is, for renunciation.

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after reading through all that it reminded me of a preacher in a chrsitian church.


the first item that came to mind was the flower.


the beauty, the peddles, the aroma; kind to the sense; all for to procreate.


even the beauty of the birds, dancing, singing for to earn the right to procreate


each for the purpose of good......'life to continue'


such is the same in all aspects of human interrelation.


in that if neither of our parents had compassion, intent and we all hope a little bit of Love; not a one of us would be here.


Then we think of all the humble contributors to our knowledge and existence and may wonder; could you imagine if each had a child to convey the knowledge and life-times commitment to the unabused eyes of their own child; could more compassion have conveyed to the observance of knowledge?


Just a perspective with a little food; or maybe 'the nectar of the lotus flower' ... perhaps?

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sa vai nivrtti-dharmena



tirodhatte sanair iha


sah--that; vai--also; nivrtti--detachment; dharmena--by engagement; vasudeva--the Supreme Personality of Godhead; anukampaya--by the mercy of; bhagavat--in relation with the Personality of Godhead; bhakti-yogena--by linking up; tirodhatte--diminishes; sanaih--gradually; iha--in this existence.


But that misconception of self-identity can be diminished gradually by the mercy of the Personality of Godhead, Vasudeva, through the process of devotional service to the Lord in the mode of detachment.


The quivering quality of material existence, which comes from identification with matter or from thinking oneself, under the material influence of philosophical speculation, to be God, can be eradicated by devotional service to the Lord, by the mercy of the Personality of Godhead, Vasudeva. As discussed in the First Canto, because the application of devotional service to Lord Vasudeva invites pure knowledge, it quickly detaches one from the material conception of life and thus revives one's normal condition of spiritual existence, even in this life, and frees one from the material winds which cause one to quiver. Only knowledge in devotional service can elevate one towards the path of liberation. The development of knowledge for the purpose of knowing everything, without rendering devotional service, is considered fruitless labor, and one cannot get the desired result by such labor of love. Lord Vasudeva is pleased by devotional service only, and thus His mercy is realized by association with pure devotees of the Lord. Pure devotees of the Lord are transcendental to all material desires, including the desire for the results of fruitive activities and philosophical speculation. If one wants to acquire the mercy of the Lord, he has to associate with pure devotees. Such association alone can, by degrees, release one from the quivering elements.


yadendriyoparamo 'tha

drastratmani pare harau

viliyante tada klesah

samsuptasyeva krtsnasah


yada--when; indriya--senses; uparamah--satiated; atha--thus; drastr-atmani--unto the seer, the Supersoul; pare--in the Transcendence; harau--unto the Supreme Personality of Godhead; viliyante--become merged in; tada--at that time; klesah--miseries; samsuptasya--one who has enjoyed sound sleep; iva--like; krtsnasah--completely.


When the senses are satisfied in the seer-Supersoul, the Personality of Godhead, and merge in Him, all miseries are completely vanquished, as after a sound sleep.


The quivering of the living entity as described above is due to the senses. Since the entire material existence is meant for sense gratification, the senses are the medium of material activities, and they cause the quivering of the steady soul. Therefore, these senses are to be detached from all such material activities. According to the impersonalists the senses are stopped from work by merging the soul in the Supersoul Brahman. The devotees, however, do not stop the material senses from acting, but they engage their transcendental senses in the service of the Transcendence, the Supreme Personality of Godhead. In either case, the activities of the senses in the material field are to be stopped by cultivation of knowledge, and, if possible, they can be engaged in the service of the Lord. The senses are transcendental in nature, but their activities become polluted when contaminated by matter. We have to treat the senses to cure them of the material disease, not stop them from acting, as suggested by the impersonalist. In Bhagavad-gita (2.59) it is said that one ceases all material activities only when satisfied by contact with a better engagement. Consciousness is active by nature and cannot be stopped from working. Artificially stopping a mischievous child is not the real remedy. The child must be given some better engagement so that he will automatically stop causing mischief. In the same way, the mischievous activities of the senses can be stopped only by better engagement in relation with the Supreme Personality of Godhead. When the eyes are engaged in seeing the beautiful form of the Lord, the tongue engaged in tasting prasada, or remnants of foodstuff offered to the Lord, the ears are engaged in hearing His glories, the hands engaged in cleaning the temple of the Lord, the legs engaged in visiting His temples--or when all the senses are engaged in transcendental variegatedness--then only can the transcendental senses become satiated and eternally free from material engagement. The Lord, as the Supersoul residing in everyone's heart and as the Supreme Personality of Godhead in the transcendental world far beyond the material creation, is the seer of all our activities. Our activities must be so transcendentally saturated that the Lord will be kind enough to look upon us favorably and engage us in His transcendental service; then only can the senses be satisfied completely and be no longer troubled by material attraction.:smash::pray:;)

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But that misconception of self-identity can be diminished gradually by the mercy of the Personality of Godhead, Vasudeva, through the process of devotional service to the Lord in the mode of detachment

In which to isolate a self from nature and what is true based on misconceptions of self identity placed into words – comprehension.

Perhaps that mercy is as a ‘self’ removes what it believes true by words and allows the experience to reveal itself.



<?xml:namespace prefix = u1 /><u1:p></u1:p>When the senses are satisfied in the seer-Supersoul, the Personality of Godhead, and merge in Him, all miseries are completely vanquished, as after a sound sleep. <u1:p></u1:p>

Senses share the experience to the environment; if silenced hearing is good. Combing the senses with knowledge shares understanding removing all miseries to each experience; walk in peace (Godhead)….

To raise a child without doubting the senses, understanding each interaction, then the excitement of accounts would be of little consequence or ‘hell to experience’ in each.

Comprehension begets Peace; understanding solves the riddle.


What is the purpose of the flower?

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I'm starting to really like you Bishadi.. Your answers are rather wise..


learning how to convey


seems if a life is good; then support it


babies, teaching and planting seeds; each good, continuing by a conscious choice; for life


the more the better.


does this make sense?

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