Guest guest Report post Posted February 4, 1999 Janpa; Permit me to be glad at your expense for posting your concern. It gives me the opportunity to say that, hey, it ain't all easy. I know the feeling of sitting in meditation and having to force myself to maintain discipline--because at that moment, discipline was needed. Sometimes we just say, hell, let it go. I'll be back tomorrow to try again. But there are times also, when one seems particularly beset by the demons of one's shadow, of one's fears, I'm certain that you understand. And, just before climbing another arduous peak, the going can just get so damn tough.... At the risk of seeming to oversimplify, virtually the only function of practice is to allow Grace to release our tensions. But these tensions have accumulated for a lifetime, for many lifetimes. Times arrive when one simply sits because sitting is the only way. Other times we sit because it is God that we are sitting with and God does not care why we are sitting, or how long we sit, She only wants to hear the sound of our voice praying for assistance, for compassion. Meditations that yield marvelous sensations, ecstasies, even, are very important. But so are the ones when we are just climbing, placing one foot in front of the other and heaving ourselves toward--whatever. "Whatever", because enlightenment is not what we think that it is. Such a humorous paradox: we truly have no idea of what we are seeking! We cannot, for once we get there--and only upon arrival--shall we then exclaim, "I had no idea that it was this simple!" I love the writing of Rudi--Swami Rudrananda, (Spiritual Cannibalism, In His Own Words, Toward Infinity), because he just lays things out plain and straightforward. No bullshit. You may have read him, but if you haven't, I certainly recommend him. He is good at communicating how struggles occur in our practice, why and sometimes offers good counsel on how to get through the tough places. And sometimes, we weep. I have wept often in search of Grace. The gift has not always arrived in what I have felt to be a timely manner. But in the end, while we struggle to offer EVERYTHING that we think, feel, value and believe to the pyre of SURRENDER, be assured that the day is coming when you shall have yearned and wept and prayed so much and so often that you will awaken and discover that you are happy. All the time. Not some kind of happiness that replaces your other emotions and experiences, but the kind that remains constant, calm and just damn wonderful--even while life around you is falling apart. This is not an emotional happiness, for you will have arrived at a place where you can discern between the emotions you experience as a human being and the serenity that is the peace of your immortal self. Friend, Jampa, God can be so demanding! Pray, have faith, receive the love of your Teacher, and with all my heart, I believe that you shall find joy... In devotion, Madhya Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest guest Report post Posted February 4, 1999 Thank you for your presence Madhya. MadhyaNandi MadhyaNandi [madhyanandi] Thursday, February 04, 1999 4:38 PM janpa's post... "MadhyaNandi MadhyaNandi" <madhyanandi Janpa; Permit me to be glad at your expense for posting your concern. It gives me the opportunity to say that, hey, it ain't all easy. I know the feeling of sitting in meditation and having to force myself to maintain discipline--because at that moment, discipline was needed. Sometimes we just say, hell, let it go. I'll be back tomorrow to try again. But there are times also, when one seems particularly beset by the demons of one's shadow, of one's fears, I'm certain that you understand. And, just before climbing another arduous peak, the going can just get so damn tough.... At the risk of seeming to oversimplify, virtually the only function of practice is to allow Grace to release our tensions. But these tensions have accumulated for a lifetime, for many lifetimes. Times arrive when one simply sits because sitting is the only way. Other times we sit because it is God that we are sitting with and God does not care why we are sitting, or how long we sit, She only wants to hear the sound of our voice praying for assistance, for compassion. Meditations that yield marvelous sensations, ecstasies, even, are very important. But so are the ones when we are just climbing, placing one foot in front of the other and heaving ourselves toward--whatever. "Whatever", because enlightenment is not what we think that it is. Such a humorous paradox: we truly have no idea of what we are seeking! We cannot, for once we get there--and only upon arrival--shall we then exclaim, "I had no idea that it was this simple!" I love the writing of Rudi--Swami Rudrananda, (Spiritual Cannibalism, In His Own Words, Toward Infinity), because he just lays things out plain and straightforward. No bullshit. You may have read him, but if you haven't, I certainly recommend him. He is good at communicating how struggles occur in our practice, why and sometimes offers good counsel on how to get through the tough places. And sometimes, we weep. I have wept often in search of Grace. The gift has not always arrived in what I have felt to be a timely manner. But in the end, while we struggle to offer EVERYTHING that we think, feel, value and believe to the pyre of SURRENDER, be assured that the day is coming when you shall have yearned and wept and prayed so much and so often that you will awaken and discover that you are happy. All the time. Not some kind of happiness that replaces your other emotions and experiences, but the kind that remains constant, calm and just damn wonderful--even while life around you is falling apart. This is not an emotional happiness, for you will have arrived at a place where you can discern between the emotions you experience as a human being and the serenity that is the peace of your immortal self. Friend, Jampa, God can be so demanding! Pray, have faith, receive the love of your Teacher, and with all my heart, I believe that you shall find joy... In devotion, Madhya ------ To from this mailing list, or to change your subscription to digest, go to the ONElist web site, at and select the User Center link from the menu bar on the left. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest guest Report post Posted February 8, 1999 very well said. and as strange as it seems at times, seeking the timeless state requires patience and recognizing that time is part of the search, part of the healing, part of the search.... ---MadhyaNandi MadhyaNandi <madhyanandi wrote: > > "MadhyaNandi MadhyaNandi" <madhyanandi > > Janpa; > > Permit me to be glad at your expense for posting your concern. It gives > me the opportunity to say that, hey, it ain't all easy. I know the > feeling of sitting in meditation and having to force myself to maintain > discipline--because at that moment, discipline was needed. Sometimes we > just say, hell, let it go. I'll be back tomorrow to try again. > > But there are times also, when one seems particularly beset by the > demons of one's shadow, of one's fears, I'm certain that you understand. > And, just before climbing another arduous peak, the going can just get > so damn tough.... > > At the risk of seeming to oversimplify, virtually the only function of > practice is to allow Grace to release our tensions. But these tensions > have accumulated for a lifetime, for many lifetimes. Times arrive when > one simply sits because sitting is the only way. Other times we sit > because it is God that we are sitting with and God does not care why we > are sitting, or how long we sit, She only wants to hear the sound of our > voice praying for assistance, for compassion. > > Meditations that yield marvelous sensations, ecstasies, even, are very > important. But so are the ones when we are just climbing, placing one > foot in front of the other and heaving ourselves toward--whatever. > "Whatever", because enlightenment is not what we think that it is. Such > a humorous paradox: we truly have no idea of what we are seeking! We > cannot, for once we get there--and only upon arrival--shall we then > exclaim, "I had no idea that it was this simple!" > > I love the writing of Rudi--Swami Rudrananda, (Spiritual Cannibalism, In > His Own Words, Toward Infinity), because he just lays things out plain > and straightforward. No bullshit. You may have read him, but if you > haven't, I certainly recommend him. He is good at communicating how > struggles occur in our practice, why and sometimes offers good counsel > on how to get through the tough places. > > And sometimes, we weep. I have wept often in search of Grace. The gift > has not always arrived in what I have felt to be a timely manner. But > in the end, while we struggle to offer EVERYTHING that we think, feel, > value and believe to the pyre of SURRENDER, be assured that the day is > coming when you shall have yearned and wept and prayed so much and so > often that you will awaken and discover that you are happy. All the > time. Not some kind of happiness that replaces your other emotions and > experiences, but the kind that remains constant, calm and just damn > wonderful--even while life around you is falling apart. This is not an > emotional happiness, for you will have arrived at a place where you can > discern between the emotions you experience as a human being and the > serenity that is the peace of your immortal self. > > Friend, Jampa, God can be so demanding! Pray, have faith, receive the > love of your Teacher, and with all my heart, I believe that you shall > find joy... > > > In devotion, > > Madhya > > ------ > To from this mailing list, or to change your subscription > to digest, go to the ONElist web site, at and > select the User Center link from the menu bar on the left. > Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
