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New element in the periodic table

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Avinash

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NEW ELEMENT IN THE PERIODIC TABLE

 

Element : WOMAN

 

Symbol : WO+

 

Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.

 

Occurrence : Copious quantities in various areas, but even more is required.

 

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES

 

1. Boils at room temperature

 

2. Freezes without any known reason.

 

3. Melts if given special treatment.

 

4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.

 

5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

 

 

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

1. Have great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.

 

2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.

 

 

3. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

 

 

COMMON USES

1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.

 

2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

 

 

TESTS

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.

 

2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

 

POTENTIAL HAZARD

Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at

different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact with

each other.

 

 

!! WARNING !!

PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS. BE CAUTIOUS ABOVE PROPERTIES ARE SHOWN BY ALL THE WOMEN OF THE WORLD

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Addendum:

 

 

Element Name: MAN

 

Symbol: XY

 

Atomic Weight: (180+/-50)

 

Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape

easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample.

Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as

young samples.

 

Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it can get. Also

tends to form strong bonds with itself. Becomes explosive when mixed with KD

(Element: Child) for prolonged periods of time.

 

Neutralize: by saturating with alcohol.

 

Usage: None known. Possibly good methane source. Good specimens are able to

produce large quantities on command.

 

Caution: In the absence of WO, this element rapidly decomposes and begins to

smell.

 

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