Jump to content
Sign in to follow this  

To Chicken to Fight? Then Cross that Road - -

Rate this topic

Recommended Posts

Why did the chicken cross the road?




That's a very interesting question.




I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.




The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.




To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.




I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens with their crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.




What business is it of yours why the chicken crossed the road? The chicken had every right to cross the road, more right than you have, since the chicken never murdered or enslaved another animal for its own pleasure.




If the chicken crossed the road on my property, I would be fully justified in blocking its exit until the local authorities could arrive to arrest it for trespassing. I am a private person and should not have to be subjected to the "innocent mistakes" of common chickens.




Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side."

That's what "they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side."




Did the chicken cross the road?

Did he cross it with a toad?

Yes! The chicken crossed the road,

But why it crossed, I've not been told!




To die. In the rain. Alone.




I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.




In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.




Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken


tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it overcame a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road.




Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.




I've got nothing to say, but it's okay: Good morning, Good morning, Good morning (background sound of chickens crossing road)




The Sun isn't yellow, it's the chicken (crossing that road)




Where have all the chickens gone long time passing?

Where have all the chickens gone long time ago?

Where have all the chickens gone? Crossed that wide road everyone.

When will they ever learn? When will they ever learn?




Maybe I should phone the cops and help the poultry dame

But monopoly is so much fun I'd hate to spoil the game

And it really doesn't matter to... anybody

Outside of a small circle of chickens... crossing that Kew Gardens road -> -> ->




I'll never knock a crossroad chicken outta your plate; and I'll never let you put one in mine.




It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.




It was an historical inevitability.




This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.




I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.




To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.




You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?




The very fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.




Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?




I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken?

Could you define chicken, please?




The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.




Without the presence of spirit soul, no chicken can cross any road. Due to sinful activity performed in his previous birth, that particular spirit soul was forced to transmigrate into a chicken body... and there is no guarantee we won't become chickens too.. so Chant Hare Krishna and Go Back Home, Back to Godhead.




Verily I say unto you: Blessed are the Peacemakers, for they shall see God face to face, even in that crossroad chicken's heart. Ergo, neither slaughter nor devour any of Our Supreme Lord's creatures, big or small, knowing well Who is dwelling within.

Indeed, Our Father, Who art in Heaven, Hallowed be Thy Name, divinely commanded, "Thou Shalt Not Kill", not even crossroad chickens.




I missed one?



ps - Prabhus & Matajis, please do improvise, adding your own transcendental flavor, tempered with KC discretion.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest


He first rolled an egg across then chased it just to prove the egg went before the chicken.

Being blinded by the lights he was hit by a truck

of devotees on their way to do sankirtan

who were out of their trees chanting Hare Krsna.

The last thing he heard before he passed away was

the Holy Name of God.

Which goes to prove in a bent sort of logic

he really just wanted to get to the other side.


We heard he took birth as a cow giving sweet

milk to all, lucky cow.


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest


He was no chicken man, he was a warrior,

an adventurer, a deep thinker.

we're just pygmies.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest


I'd say to build up it's self esteem

to go forward and put closure on

those Roosta's rough treatment

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest


'Why the Chicken Hit the Road'

The cowards guide to Hit and Run.

How to waste human life and become

a chicken in your next life, taking

as many as possible into the feeding

trays with you.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest

ABU BACK BASHA (not Front Fighter)

Osama, Osama where fore art thou?

I've been revealed.

I'm no chicken, I'm a possum

and an ill one at that,

Osama don't forsake me.

Chickens unite.

It's the Americans! They did it.

Why do they lay such big freeways

So hard to cross.

What chance do chickens have?


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites
Guest guest


Everyone lay on the road

Lets get some jungle back

so those chickens no longer have anxiety attacks.

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites



The chicken was able to walk on the road because according to the 3rd law of motion, the action produced by pressing its feet on the road created an equal and opposite reaction that made it move forward and cross the road!



Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Please slightly change this thread title to either:

1) Y did that Chicken cross...? or

2) Y that Chicken crossed... - or

3) Y Chickens Cross Roads - or

4) Why Chickens Cross Roads


Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Mister T: "I pity the fool who questions why chickens cross roads!"


FDR: "That very day that very first chicken first crossed the First Road is a Day that will Live in Infamy"


Thomas Jefferson: "We hold these truths to be self-evident; that all chickens were created equal, at least in so far as their ability to cross roads."


Michael Moore: "While 'Bowling for Columbine' several armed chickens were observed crossing both alleys & roads"


CREAM - DISRAELI GEARS: Chicken Crossroads


Bhagavad-Gita: "Never was there a time when I did not exist, nor u, nor all these Kings. Nor in the future shall any of us cease to be. Then what to speak of all these crossroad chickens?"



Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Aeriel Sharon: "I hereby assure the entire international community that we Zionist Israelis have not, r not and shall not displace any Christian or Muslim Palestinians by destroying their homes & enforcing curfew under Martial Law.

No, never! We r not barbarians. That is not our style.

We r simply pacifying chickens who dare to cross the road."

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Y did that chicken cross that road? Y?

To lay it on the line.

Hopefully the line was visible, not too worn away.

NIXON: "I'm glad u asked me that question. Let me make things perfectly clear..."

KRUSHCHEV in Harlem, NYC 1960 visiting Castro was asked about Fidel & responded:

"I don't know whether Castro is a communist, but I am certainly a Crossroad Chicken Fidelista."

Share this post

Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Sign in to follow this  

  • Create New...