Celibacy - Love It or Leave It

[Tarun 6]

Just in case you thought family life in India is simpler.

Well it is in some ways.

This film may serve as further impetus for some to renounce.

* * Member of the Wedding or (Aditi Gets Cold Feet * * Mira Nair's love letter to family, weddings and India revolves around elaborate nuptials of two young professionals, each with one foot planted in tradition and the other in the modern, globalized world. In love with married television personality Vikram Mehta (Sameer Arya), Aditi Verma (Vasundhar Das) decides marriage is her best chance for moving forward and so allows her parents, Lalit (Naseeruddin Shah) and Pimmi (Lillete Dubey), to arrange match with Hemant Rai (Parvin Dabas), an engineer who lives in Houston, Tex. Soon Verma and Rai families — but especially Vermas — are up to their bindis in wedding preparations, which include a whirlwind of receptions, parties and other events leading up to the big day. Lalit hires planner P.K. Dube (Vijay Raaz) to handle endless details — tents, marigold gates, musicians, catering — while Pimmi entertains dozens of relatives converging on New Delhi from points as far flung as Australia and U.S. Meanwhile, Aditi gets cold feet and, ignoring level-headed advice of her older, unmarried cousin Ria (Shefali Shetty), sneaks off for a disastrous assignation with Vikram. As wedding approaches, emotions run high: Lalit and Pimmi argue about whether their chubby, dance-loving son (Ishaan Nair) should attend military school. Cousin Rahul (Randeep Hooda) flirts with sultry dance student Ayesha (Neha Dubey). Lalit worries about money, unaware Aditi is about to confess her indiscretions to Hemant, possibly scuttling the wedding, and Ria must decide whether to explain her dismay that jovial Uncle Tej (Rajat Kapoor), who now resides in America but lived with the Vermas when Ria was a child, has singled out little cousin Aliya (Kemaya Kidwai) for his special attentions. Like Nair herself, the Vermas are of Punjabi extraction; originally from India's northwest, many Punjabis were displaced after the 1947 partition of India and Pakistan but rebounded to become part of India's thriving middle class. Punjabi weddings are notorious for their lavishness, and Nair's intoxicating soap opera revels in sights and sounds of this clamorous family ritual. Her style is a canny combination of contemporary realism — cinematographer Declan Quinn's hand-held camera glides among the participants like a nameless partygoer, while characters speak a fluid mix of Punjabi, English and Hindi — and glossy Bollywood clichés. The subplot involving Dube's romance with the Vermas' shy young maid (Tilotama Shome) is the stuff of pulp romance, and Nair even manages to get in a dance number and a wet sari scene before the festivities are over.

— Maitland McDonagh, Country of Origin: India

 

 

[Tarun 6]

Artificial celibacy won't do.

We must become so absorbed in KC that all else, including sex, becomes superfluous, insignificant.

Or as PrahlAd put it:

"yan maithunAdi grhamedhi sukham hi tuccham"

[Tarun 6]

Heather Graham's Catholic Dilemma (World Entertainment News)

Sexy actress HEATHER GRAHAM detests her strict Catholic upbringing - because it stopped her having sex and boozing.

AUSTIN POWERS beauty, 32, admits her rigid lifestyle got in the way of her desires to enjoy a more racy existence and as a result the scarred star now can't live without her therapist.

She says, "I grew up thinking sex was bad and I felt very guilty. I began to think,

'Why am I supposed to be something I'm not?' I wanted to have a relationship and be in love. And I wanted, every now and then, to get drunk."

Graham, who has been romantically linked to ED BURNS and HEATH LEDGER, now admits that almost all of her decisions are made with the aid of a shrink.

She continues, "Therapy has remained a vital part of my life. I probably wouldn't have a career if I didn't do it.

[Tarun 6]

Definitely ISKCON Material

New Book Exposes George Harrison's Sex-Mad Past

World Entertainment News Network

*GEORGE HARRISON's reputation as a mild-mannered, peace-loving soul is set to be shattered by a new book exposing his wild side - like the night he slept with pal RINGO STARR's wife.

*MARC SHAPIRO's forthcoming tome on the 'Quiet BEATLE,' BEHIND SAD EYES: THE LIFE OF GEORGE HARRISON, features incidents from Harrison's secret world - as a jealous adulterer.

*The biography goes into great depth about the break-up of Harrison's first marriage to PATTIE BOYD - triggered by the guitarist declaring he loved Starr's wife MAUREEN at a family party.

*Shapiro writes, "A few weeks later, Pattie came home and found George and Maureen in bed together."

*George, who was later named as the major cause of the break-up of the Starrs' marriage, then flew into a jealous rage shortly afterwards when he realised his wife and ERIC CLAPTON were having an affair.

*Eventually, according to Shapiro, Clapton confronted Harrison and told him he was in love with his wife. Shapiro writes, "George stunned Clapton by saying casually, you can have her - and I'll have your girlfriend."

*But the break-up of his marriage sent the BEATLE into a drug-fuelled womanising existence - until he met soulmate OLIVIA in the mid-1970s.

[Tarun 6]

Zellweger Doesn't Need Love

World Entertainment News Network

BRIDGET JONES'S DIARY star RENEE ZELLWEGER doesn't need love to make her happy.

The svelte blonde split with fiancé JIM CARREY last year, then briefly dated Hollywood playboy GEORGE CLOONEY.

She says, "I really believe in love. But I don't require it for happiness and I'm not on a constant quest for 'the big relationship'."

Her only big relationship, she says, is her 14-year-old collie DYLAN, who accompanies her to film sets.

No comment.

[Tarun 6]

Tonight, Bill Maher's "Politically Incorrect" discussed virginity.

One guest, Marie Louise Kurey is a 27yr old satisfied virgin.

She recently testified before Congress about Celibacy's glories.

Very impressive. Her arguments soundly defeated everyone present.

[Tarun 6]

Reintroducing Single Sex Schools worldwide is primary key to increased Celibacy & Overpopulation control.

[Tarun 6]

Child Welfare Bosses Probe R Kelly Sex Tape Case - NME News

Child welfare officials have reopened their investigation into the parents of the underage girl at the center of sex tape charges against R KELLY.

Last December, before the tape featuring Kelly allegedly having sex with the girl surfaced, the Illinois Department Of Children And Family Services received a tip that the girl's parents knew Kelly would have sex with her, thereby subjecting her to harm.

Their investigations came to nothing due to lack of evidence and a denial of involvement by the girl and her parents. According to the Chicago Tribune, the DFCS say they didn't question Kelly at the time because "we were unable to find him."

Yesterday, the DCFS announced they were to renew their investigation.

Kelly was charged last week on 21 counts of child pornography. The charges stem from a videotape that is said to show the embattled star having sex with the 14-year-old girl. The 26-minute tape was sent anonymously to the Chicago Sun-Times in February. The paper turned the video over to the police. The tape allegedly depicts Kelly and the girl in a room engaged in various sex acts, including Kelly urinating on the girl. Copies of it have become a best-selling bootleg in New York and Chicago.

Kelly is currently on bail due in a Chicago court for a preliminary hearing on June 24.

[Tarun 6]

By LAURA MECKLER - Associated Press

Do check out her unique spelling for 'researchers'

 

WASHINGTON (Sept. 26) - Parents wondering if their teenagers are having sex might look upstairs or down the hall. New research finds most sexually active teens first had sex in their parents' homes, typically late at night.

 

The findings, being released Thursday, should dispel myths that teens are most often having sex after school, when parents are still at work, researchers said. The message for parents, experts say, is nothing new: Be aware of what your kids are up to.

 

''Kids no longer need to drive to lookout point to have sex,'' said Sarah Brown, director of the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy. ''The data suggest the adults may be in the house.''

 

By the time students are in the ninth grade, 34 percent have had sexual intercourse. That rises to 60 percent by 12th grade.

 

The report, by researchers at Child Trends, is based on a national teen survey that has been tracking about 8,000 teens since 1997. The ages of the teens ranged from 12-16 when the survey began, and res88earchers have interviewed the same group every year since then. This report looks specifically at the 664 teens who reported having sex for the first time between 1999 and 2000.

 

Of those surveyed in 2000, 56 percent said they first had sex at their family's home or at the home of their partner's family.

 

Another 12 percent had their first sex at a friend's house; 9 percent at a teen's own home; 4 percent in a truck or car; 3 percent at a park or other outdoor place and 3 percent at a hotel or motel. Ten percent said someplace else.

 

The findings reinforce earlier research that parents can have a significant impact on their children's decisions about sex, Brown said.

 

''This notion that it's impossible to supervise kids is ludicrous if a lot of them are having sex in the rec room,'' she said.

 

Earlier this month, researchers reported that teen girls who are close to their moms are more likely to stay virgins. That report, by researchers at the University of Minnesota, also found that half of mothers of sexually active teens didn't realize their children were having sex. Further, while the vast majority of mothers strongly disapprove of their teenager's having sex, large numbers of teens don't realize how their moms feel.

 

''Parents need to know where their children are and what they're doing,'' Brown said. ''This is not a new idea.''

 

As for timing, Thursday's report found 42 percent of teens said their first sexual encounter was at night, between 10 p.m. and 7 a.m. Another 28 percent said it was in the evening, between 6-10 p.m.

 

Just 15 percent said it was in the late afternoon, between 3-6 p.m.

 

That cuts against the conventional wisdom among parents and policy makers alike that teens are more ''at risk'' of sex after school, said Jennifer Manlove, a researcher at Child Trends.

 

Research has shown that teens are more likely to commit crime during the after-school hours, Brown said. But people have wrongly assumed that the same goes for sex, she said.

 

The National Longitudinal Survey of Youth did not look at whether teens were having sex on weeknights or weekends. And it did not ask if parents were home at the time. Although the survey has been interviewing teens since 1997, this was the first year the questions about where and when teens first had sex were asked.

AP-NY-09-26-02 0013EDT

[Tarun 6]

An Rx For Teen Sex

Doctors are joining the abstinence movement. Here's why they're now telling kids, "Just say no"

BY JODIE MORSE

PENNY DE LOS SANTOS FOR TIME

Eighth graders take part in an exercise during a Worth the Wait sex ed class

Sunday, Sep. 29, 2002

The slide show was chilling: a cervix with precancerous lesions, shriveled fallopian tubes. But what made Seth Claude and his friends really blanch was a penis covered in sores and distended like an autumn gourd. "Before, I just thought if you got genital warts, maybe you had one or two, but then I saw the person with a bajillion of them and was, like, 'Whoa,'" says Seth, 13. "(The pictures) are enough to make you have nightmares."

 

But will they keep him from having sex? The images form the backbone of Worth the Wait, a sex-education curriculum taught at Seth's school, Caldwell Middle School in Caldwell, Texas, and in 31 districts across the state. Written by Dr. Patricia Sulak, an obstetrician-gynecologist and professor at Texas A&M University's College of Medicine, the lessons set forth the clinical consequences of teen sex in pictures and eye-popping statistics charting the numbers of young people infected with sexually transmitted diseases. The take-home message: abstain from intercourse or put yourself at grave medical risk.

 

A bitter battle over sex ed has long raged in this country—and with each year the foes have become more deeply set in their stances. On one side are religious conservatives arguing that sex outside of wedlock is unholy. They have secured millions of federal dollars for abstinence programs that teach about the hazards of contraceptives. The other camp, backed by virtually every major medical organization, contends it is irresponsible to deny kids information about condoms. Now, as Congress is weighing President Bush's proposal to boost abstinence funding by 33% to $135 million, those allegiances are shifting. A small but vocal cohort of doctors has gone to the abstention side. "I used to think all we had to do was dump condoms in the schools and be done with it," says Sulak. "But after reviewing the data, I've had to do a 180 on kids and sex."

 

The turnabout is proving contagious. Sulak has sold her slide kits to health-care workers in 44 states. More significant, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, which has long been on the other bank of the sex-ed divide, will honor her with a presidential award next spring. Meanwhile, a group of more than 400 doctors collaborated on an abstinence cd-rom, Prescriptions for Parents: A Physicians' Guide to Adolescence and Sex, released last month by the National Physicians Center for Family Resources. "Parents and children want medical facts, not a one-sided moralist approach," says Dianna Lightfoot, the center's president.

 

Sex in the Classroom

 

A half-hour news special airing on MTV Oct. 3 at 10 p.m. (ET/PT). The program hits the streets to find out how communities nationwide teach teens about sex — and how kids feel about it.

--

Go to MTV.com to see full results of the TIME/MTV Poll on Sex Education and Teen Sexuality.

 

Abstinence educators also want to put the medical story on the table. From 1999 to 2001, the Medical Institute for Sexual Health in Austin, Texas, which markets materials to abstinence instructors, saw a 150% increase in sales of its products. Even the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (cdc), whose education programs encouraged condom use, has been quietly recasting its position on abstinence. The agency pulled from its website this summer a feature called Programs that Work, which had touted the success of eight condom-based sex-ed curriculums. Now the agency is focusing on abstinence-only programs. Says Lloyd Kolbe, director of the cdc's division of adolescent and school health and an original author of the condom feature: "It was a very limited approach."

 

What's different now? The '90s presented a mixed picture of teen sexual health. There was a solid 20% decline in the teen birth rate, and according to a cdc report released last week, sexual activity decreased 15%. But the incidence of certain sexually transmitted diseases rose among adolescents. A quarter of all new hiv cases today occur in those ages 21 and younger. And doctors are reporting more frequent diagnoses of herpes and the human papillomavirus, or hpv, which is linked to cervical cancer and is thought to infect more than 15% of sexually active teens. The last figure is the one gnawing at some doctors. Though the particulars of hpv remain something of a medical mystery, we have learned at least one frightening thing about the disease: hpv is spread through skin-to-skin contact of genitals and their surrounding areas, so condoms do not always protect against it. Which means, as Sulak is fond of saying, there is no such thing as safe sex.

 

That Sulak should be leading this charge is a little surprising. She is a highly respected contraceptive expert who has devoted the past decade to researching the birth-control pill. She came to her latest cause seven years ago when she was asked to help choose a sex-ed program for her son's middle school. The curriculums she examined were steeped in ideology and medical errors. So she designed one, drawing extensively on data from the National Institutes of Health and the cdc. "All we've done is state facts," she says, "and you can't argue with facts."

 

But the way those facts are framed is drawing fire from both sides. Some hard-line conservatives, who see sex ed as the one culture war in which they have had consistent successes, contend Sulak doesn't do enough to promote the sanctity of marriage, a condition of receiving federal abstinence funding. Nor are they particularly pleased by the prospect of young children spending part of their school days looking at cervixes. Says Leslee Unruh, president of the National Abstinence Clearinghouse: "I've raised five abstinent children without showing one of them diseased genitals."

 

For their part, advocates of comprehensive sex ed worry about sins of omission. Worth the Wait is silent on masturbation and homosexuality and, in keeping with federal guidelines, mentions condoms only to point out their myriad imperfections. "Manipulating facts about condoms is using a scare tactic to try and get kids not to be sexually active," says Tamara Kreinin, president of the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the U.S. "And the fact that physicians are now doing this gives it an added level of credibility." Dr. David Kaplan, a professor of pediatrics at the University of Colorado School of Medicine, shares her concern: "It's infuriating not to give kids information so that they can protect themselves."

 

Yet some of Sulak's most ardent defenders also come from within the medical profession. "I'm a convert to her way of thinking," says Dr. Gerald Joseph Jr., an obstetrician-gynecologist in Springfield, Mo., and district officer at the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. "There's no question her program is 100% medically accurate and responsible." Indeed, doctors have a hand in all aspects of the Worth the Wait curriculum. Not only do they train health educators from participating schools, but either a doctor or medical student also gives a guest lecture to students during the semester. If at any point during the program those students say they won't be abstaining until wedlock, they are promptly referred to a medical professional to talk about contraceptives.

 

Perhaps the most pressing question about Worth the Wait is the one that has dogged the abstinence movement from the start: Does it work? Though a major federal evaluation of 11 programs is due out early next year, no study has yet confirmed the merits of the just-say-no approach. But there are small signs that Worth the Wait is making a difference. A continuing evaluation that involves Texas A&M University professors found that from 1999 to 2001, frequency of sexual activity among seventh- and eighth-graders in the program dropped 4% and 2% respectively.

 

Back in Caldwell, Seth Claude and his girlfriend Chaille say they are taking things slowly. "We sit next to each other on the bus and at lunch," he says. And when they get together, they often wind up talking about genital warts.

—With reporting by Perry Bacon Jr./Washington and Adam Pitluk/Caldwell