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Why am I married ?

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You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable,

or get married and wish you were dead.

_________

 

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,

'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'

'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'

__________

 

A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds: 'Husband Wanted'.

Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: 'You can have mine.'

__________

 

When a woman steals your husband,

there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

__________

 

A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished .

__________

 

A little boy asked his father, 'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'

Father replied, 'I don't know son, I'm still paying.'

__________

 

A young son asked, 'Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa

a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'

Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son.'

__________

 

Then there was a woman who said,

'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,

and by then, it was too late.'

__________

 

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.

_________

 

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.

__________

 

Just think, if it weren't for marriage,men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

__________

 

First guy says, 'My wife's an angel!'

Second guy remarks, 'You're lucky, mine's still alive.'

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