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Anxiety about marriage

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Hi,

 

I am worried about my marriage. i am 27 years old. However, I don't want an arranged marriage. The very thought of arranged marriage makes me panic. I liked a guy, but things didn't work out. I don't have any boyfriend right now. My parents have consulted some astrologer, and he told them that marriage will be late. He advised me to wear a pukhraj, which i am wearing since Dec 2007.

 

Another problem is, that I am doing PhD, and don't want to get married now, since I don't know how long it will take for me to graduate.

 

Could the learned astrologers here please help me? what should i do? When will i complete my phd? What are my marital prospects? when would be a good time to start 'looking' ?

 

Would wearing a red coral help with studies/career? (i think mars is an atmakaraka and yogakarak for me). Sometimes I find it difficult to be motivated for studies. I get distracted by other things that I enjoy doing, and find it hard to strike a balance between studies,hobbies and responsibilities that come with living alone. At other times I procrastinate too much. And then sometimes I am struck by doubt in my abilities, and get depressed over my slow progress. Also, my friends take up a considerable amount of my time, always coming to me for advice, and i find it hard to say no, and get too involved in their problems. In fact, i always find myself consoling someone or the other. not that i mind it, but it tires me out to be listening to their problems all the time. i feel like there is no one i can turn to for advice. I love to live alone, because I can hide from people when I want to. It helps me to recharge. But at times I feel very lonely. I just wish I had a guy who I could depend on, the way my friends depend on me.

 

these are my birth details:

16th Jan, 1981, 5:35 pm, Lucknow, India.

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Thanks Deepaji and USRji,

 

my family backgroud is a little troubled. I am very close to my mother. My parents marriage is a match made in hell. Mother is well educated and is a college lecturer. Father is a diploma engineer but has had a very bad employment history. He is aggresive and short tempered. During the time I was growing up, he was mostly absent as he worked in different city, or if he was there used to work late hours. He was emotionally distant too. I have one younger sister born on 19th July 1983, who i am very close to.

 

I don't really have too many 'major' events, so i'll just list all that come to mind:

 

Graduated out of college in 24th May 2004 with btech in mechanical engineering. I have always been a good student. Worked for one year. Thereafter came to USA to pursue phd in Aug 16, 2005.

Mother fell very sick in Dec 2002-Jan 2003 (cirrhosis due to undiagnosed hepatitis) and was hospitalized for over a month. Mother's health is a source of concern to me. Since my sister is working, my mother is staying alone with father these days, so that is another worry. So i want to complete phd and go back to India as soon as possible.

 

I fell sick every 3 yrs as a child....had jaundice when i was around 8, appendicitis when 11, some kind of pneumonia/cough (don't remember) whn i was 14, and measles when i was around 16-17. I was diagnosed to have rheumatoid arthritis in August 2003.

I got my drivers license and bought a car in May 2007. And moved in a rented apartment on my own (which was a dream for a long time) in Nov 2007.

I met a guy during May-June 2003 whn i was doing an internship, and entered a long distance relationship with him. This relationship broke in dec 2004, when he was in USA and he cheated on me. However, i was not ready to accept what happened, and was in denial and depression for about one year, and during this time i decided to come to US to try to convince him to give it one more shot. I finally came to terms with it by Dec 2005. Then in March 2006, i entered the most wonderful phase of my life, when i realized the higher reasons for whatever happened. I also fell in love with a most wonderful guy, although we never had a relationship, and were only close friends. This ended by Dec 2006, when i realized that due to cultural and religious differences, he was not ready to take it forward. But this friendship was the most spiritual experience of my life, strengthening my faith in God and restoring my confidence. He inspired me. Anywyas, he has now graduated and moved to a different city, and although I am still friends with him, and have no hard feelings, i have almost stopped talking to him because I dont want the feelings to resurface. This has left a huge void, since he happens to be my best friend and trusted guide. Still, for almost one year, whenever i was too depressed or in trouble of some kind, he would miraculously call me out of the blue. it is a very deep connection.

 

well, because of all this, now it is impossible for me to go for an arranged marriage.

 

I want to settle down in India, or middle-east, so that I can be close to my family. I also want to take a break after completing my PhD, get married and just enjoy life for 1-2 years and then decide what i want to do with my career. I am very fond of cooking and arts and crafts, and i have been indulging quite a bit in these hobbies since past 9 months :) So Deepaji, you are quite right about me wanting to take a brk.

 

Please let me know if you need any other information from me.

thanks so much, it is so good to know that there is someone i can turn to for help.

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EVERYBODY SHOULD PERFORM MANGAL DOSHA NIVARAN POOJA IN A NAVAGRAHA TEMPLE BEFORE MARRIAGE, WHETHER YOU ARE A MANGLIK OR NON MANGLIK DOESNT MATTER.MARS IS THE KARAKA FOR GOOD HUSBAND,BEAUTIFUL WIFE,SMOOTH MARRIED LIFE. GIVE PRIORITY TO LORD MARS FOR MARRIAGE.

 

for rahu mahadasha - RAHU :-

GIVE RADDISH(MOOLI) IN CHARITY ON SAT NIGHT AFTER 7PM (21saturdays).

One of the best remedies for rahu is reciting the first chapter of Durga Saptasati.

"OM DUM DURGAYA NAMAH" - 108 TIMES DAILY IN RAHUKAAL.

 

curse of moon in ur horoscope:-. Worship the ruling deity Gouri.

2. Recite Annapoorna stotram.

3. Japa of Moon's moola mantra: <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:place>Om</st1:place> shram sreem shraum sah chandraya namah, 10000 times in 40 days.

4. Recite the Chandra stotra:

Dadhi Shankha tushaarabham ksheero darnava sambhavam

Namaami shashinam somam shambhor mukuta bhushanam

5. Charity: Donate cow's milk or rice on Monday

6. Fasting: On Mondays.

7. Pooja: Devi pooja.

8. Rudraksha: Wear 2 mukhi Rudraksha.

Regards

NIKHIL KUMAR VARMA

nikhilkumarvarma@

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Dear Rohini (your nickname),

 

It seems, you are running Rahu major dasa since 14/3/2005 till 8/1/2013.

Do not over worry about the accuracy of given date.

 

Your bukhti is venus from 31/8/2006 till 15/8/2009.

I would recommend you to wear pearl to fortify your mind.

As for venus bukti which is running now, and due to its weak placement:

every friday, circulambulate sukra 9 times and chant "Om Sukraya Namaha".

 

About your marriage, you might not get your dream prince.

Be bold, do not rush into trap. Arrange marriage better suit you. 24/7/2008 till 11/1/2009 promises marriage for you. Your future husband hail from reputable family but might not be your taste. The vaccum at yout heart can be filled up with career upliftment.

 

Thanks.

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Hi everyone,

 

thanks for pouring in with your advice.

 

Bhaaskaran ji,

why do you feel that arranged marriage better suits me? Please don't mind, but I am a very independant girl. I'd rather not marry than marry a person i don't love and respect. I am not looking for a dream prince, just a deep connection. Another thing is that whenever I wear pearl, I feel more disturbed than I normally do. I don't know why that is the case.

 

Nikhil Kumar ji,

thanks I'll recite the mantra for durga. I have one doubt though, I do not believe in idol-worship, and I am more in tune with the concept of formless God. Would the said mantra work if I am unable to chant it with the required degree o devotion?

Also, could u explain about the curse of moon in more detail? what does it mean?

 

I recently discovered the concept of atmakaraka, and also the concept of navamsa as what the soul wants. Could anyone look at my horoscope and give me spiritual advice, is that is not too much to ask for...

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