vanamali

I will create a new mail ID with false information like location, etc. and then I will post it here. No problem.

Once you've written it down I will delete the message.

I agree with stonehearted!

When choosing Stone-hearted friends, make sure it's the right kind of stone

~Vanamali /images/graemlins/smile.gif

I have read that Sridevi and Bhudevi as best friends and co-wives sometimes corner their husband. When Sri devi begins to talk to Him about His pleading devotees, he turns to the left, but Bhu devi is standing there with the same expression on Her face, and He cannot say no to them.

Even you don't have to tell your secret, don't worry /images/graemlins/smile.gif

If you have secrets to tell re Krishnapriya you can tell me, sister.

I don't have any secrets to give in return, at least I don't think so. But I can send some of my more confidential poems if I can find suitable ones to show.

Do you want my email address?

~Vanamali

This is true

Religion is easy when you know the lord is looking after you, and that He is a loving Person full of karunya for His devotees.

Not because we are good devotees, but because He is overflowing with generosity and love.

Bhagavan Sri Krishna ki jai!

I was thinking about all my options. I said to Krishna, how can I get you? I looked to all the people who had found their way to Him in the past. The gopis performed Katyaayani vrat. I do not have the heart to do that, because from my experience if you make some mistake in a vrat to the Goddess it will have the opposite effect. Krishna's wives were rescued by Him from Narakasura. That does not help me.

I came across this quote thinking this might be the answer, but in truth I can only worship Krishna and Krishna alone. I only want Him.

So I wretchedly wait for Him to respond to my letters and my poems and my prayers.

As Rukmini waited patiently for the answer to Her letter, so I wait impatiently for His reply.

The Self We Share

Thirst is angry with water. Hunger bitter

with bread.The cave wants nothing to do

with the sun. This is dumb, the self-

defeating way we've been. A gold mine is

calling us into its temple. Instead, we

bend and keep picking up rocks from the

ground. Every thing has a shine like gold,

but we should turn to the source! The

origin is what we truly are. I add a little

vinegar to the honey I give. The bite of

scolding makes ecstasy more familiar. But

look, fish, you're already in the ocean:

just swimming there makes you friends with

glory. What are these grudges about? You

are Benjamin. Joseph has put a gold cup

in your grain sack and accused you of being

a thief. Now he draws you aside and says,

"You are my brother. I am a prayer. You're

the amen." We move in eternal regions, yet

worry about property here. This is the

prayer of each: You are the source of my

life. You separate essence from mud. You

honor my soul. You bring rivers from the

mountain springs. You brighten my eyes. The

wine you offer takes me out of myself into

the self we share. Doing that is religion.

Two Friends

A certain person came to the Friend's door

and knocked.

"Who's there?"

"It's me."

The Friend answered, "Go away. There's no place

for raw meat at this table."

The individual went wandering for a year.

Nothing but the fire of separation

can change hypocrisy and ego. The person returned

completely cooked,

walked up and down in front of the Friend's house,

gently knocked.

"Who is it?"

"You."

"Please come in, my self,

there's no place in this house for two.

The doubled end of the thread is not what goes through

the eye of the needle.

It's a single-pointed, fined-down, thread end,

not a big ego-beast with baggage."

~Rumi

sa jagarti tasyah parivara-cetas-

tate 'nuksanam ramya-lila-sametah

athapy asta-yamikya-musyah saparya

yatha-kalam acaryate tena varya

He who keeps a vigil for eight nights, remaining awake and at every moment meditating on the divine couple's transcendental pastimes, at the proper time will attain the object of his worship.

This is from Srila Visvanatha Cakravarti's

Sri Radhika-dhyanamrta

Do you think anyone has ever tried this?

He is so merciful He will certainly accept you despite your faults.

I would not be happy with just an hour, but He knows that.

First I said, oh God just get me to tirupati once, that's all I ask of You.

Now that I've been there, I am not fulfilled of course! My pyass has increased more than ever!

O Sakhi, O Sweet Krishnapriye!

"She ultimately gets to see Her secret beloved. She first looks at His lotus feet and in her heart bows down flat before Him with heaps and heaps of emotions but she can't do this in open.-

This is what I mean. I wasn't actually bothered by the aishwarya, I do suppose it actually heightened the sentiment. First I thought, "Oh God, there are so many people someone will see me looking at You with those pleading eyes, and they will know my secret.

Then I thought "Oh thank God there are so many people, no one will ever notice me at all!"

But He noticed me. Darshan at tirupati was an emotional experience because basically we had just arrived in India the previous day, rested for about an hour, drove twelve hours straight from Hyderabad. We arrived at about 4am just in time to hear Suprabhatam blazing over the loudspeakers.

We again rested for a few hours, went to Akashaganga and Papavinasa Theerthams, and then went to see the god. I had not slept in three days by this time, and had eaten very little. I was so nervous to see Him, because I knew that this was not just and ordinary murti, this was the swambhu moorti, self-manifested, the actual god standing right there. All these things were rushing through my mind. When I saw him, my body started trembling all over, my skin tingling, I started crying and my eyes tried to close and roll back into my head, but I kept them plastered open, staring at Him. All I can remember is that huge tilakam. He was so large, right there in front of me. It was so wonderful!

Who knows when I'll be able to go back there. But I remembered to ask a boon from Him, as Venkateshwara is famous for giving boons, and standing right in front of Him I said, Govinda, I want You and only You forever.

So here I am far away from Him and missing Him terribly.

Forever Yours,

Vanamali

God bless you prabhuji, krishnaji! It is not bad to be a grihasta! In fact, householders are the most important of all. Householders support all the other forms of life. Householders donate money to the temple, householders completely support religious life and society itself. From who else would the sannyasis ask biksham?

It is a very auspicious state to be married and have a family. That is why Lord Rama and Lord Krishna did the same when he came to earth. Of the famous dasavatara there are only two brahmins (Parasurama and Vamana) the rest are householding kshatriyas.

It is even recommended in most sampradayas that pujaris be married householders. This is preferred.

If someone is making you feel bad about being the most important link in the foodchain, then leave his association and come to people who understand.

Even if you are brahmin, you can do the work of kshatriya or vaishya if you come on hard times. Also kshatriya can do the work of a vaishya if he needs the money. (This notwithstanding, one is supposed to return to one's own duty as soon as possible).

I think if it is up to you to decide your varna, definitely no-one will choose sudra, no?

I have married into a kshatriya family, so I am kind of an adopted kshatriya. That made it easy for me.

Anyway, hopefully Krishna will take you home at the end of this life, so what does it matter what your varna is. What is your occupation? This will tell you what your varna is. What is your aptitude?

Stick to whatever job you're fit for even if it becomes difficult. This is varna.

~Vanamali

Mother Kali is not Satan or something like this. Rather she represents the destructive force which we must remember has no effect on the Atman, but only on our bodies.

I am writing a paper for a class about Lord Rama and Lord Krishna. I would love it if you could share some of your insights... what do you find the most compelling thing about each of these avatars. Moreover, what do you think is the significance of the difference in personalities;

well behaved child (Sri Ram) vs. naughty child (Krishna), etc.

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Devotees fall, but Krishna Himself declares "my devotee never perishes"

We may fall, but this is why gives us not only second chances, but third, fourth, fifth, billionth and trillionth chances, as birth after birth we come to Him.

Cinta mat karo, prabhuji!

Probably I would pay some qualified people to preach for me. Open a big South Indian style temple with my Venu Gopala as the main deity, a large Venkateshwara swamy, small Venkateshwara with Sridevi and Bhudevi. Ram Darbar should also be there. It would have the tirupati-style gopuram and gold shikharam. There should also be small statues of Ganapati, and many of the great bhaktas like- Ramanujacharya, Meera, Andal, Hanumanji, etc. I would like to put a day care so people won't bring their small kids inside if they are not interested, so no little children running around durning aarthi.

New clothes for deities at least once a month. A separate hall for: Hindi lessons, Sanskrit lessons, Bharatanatyam, Odissi, and Kathak lessons, Gita and Bhagavatam classes, and discourses every two weeks.

Library with TV where you can actually sit and watch episodes from Mahabharat serial, or old NTR religous movies.

Big kitchen and dining hall and stage area which can be rented out at cost to devotees for functions such as marriages, arangetrams and other dance and theatrical (devotional) programmes.

Okay, this is getting out of hand now. Anyway...

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How can I serve Him? Especially how can I serve Him directly? Even the thought of serving Him directly brings joyfullness- there fore how can "serving" Him be service at all? It would be all to blissful to wash His clothes, clean His house, massage His lotus feet. I'm sure this cannot be service, then, it is in reality pure bliss.

And when you think about it, how is it possible to serve at all in life, when everything one does for Krishna becomes enjoyable just for the sake of doing for Him? So indeed we are not servants, but merely poor souls seeking refuge at His lotus feet. How low we are! How sweet He is!

FYI Ashta Lakshmi shown above

Adi Lakshmi

Dhanya Lakshmi

Dhairya Lakshmi

Gaja Lakshmi

Santana Lakshmi

Vijaya Lakshmi

Dhana Lakshmi

Vidya Lakshmi

Here is a picture of Alamelumanga (Padmavati) Venkateshwara's consort.

Bas! Enough re! /images/graemlins/smile.gif

Hallo Krishnapriye,

I will not say precisely what kind of relation I feel to Sri Krishna, but I don't mind about lawfully marrying Him. I would simply like to enter into His personal life in a way, even if for a day or an hour. Or if this is not possible I would like to be born in Venkata so I could be in His presence forever! I could be born as a bird and fly straight into the the garbha griha every day, bypassing the queue! I will take whatever He gives me.

When I was at Tirupati I did not feel separation from Krishna. I felt that Venkateshwara was Krishna. The only thing that bothered me was the overwhelming sense of Aishwarya that is all-pervading in that place. I have no complaints, but I would have really liked a private audience with Him, which of course is impossible!

But then, when we went to Alamelumanga's temple after, for some reason Alamelumanga was not giving darshan for the afternoon, and we only got to see Balaji there. The temple was nearly empty for some reason- very few people there. As soon as we walked up, the pujari gave me two purple flowers from the Lord's feet. It was at that point I really felt that Venkateshwara understood what I was feeling and had mercy on me.

Sri seshasaila suniketana divyamoorte

Naryanaacyuta Hare nalinaayataaksha

leelatkataksha parirakshita sarvaloka

Sri Venkatesha mama dehi karavalambam

Oh Sri Venkatesha, You have Your magnificent abode in the Sheshadri hills! You of divine form, Narayana Acyuta Hari

With eyes as broad as lotus petals!

You who protect the worlds with a playful sidelong glance of Your eyes-

Sri Venkatesha, please give me the support of Your hand!

brahmaadivandita padaambuja shankhapane

srimatsudarshana sushobita divyahasta

kaarunyasaagara sharanya supunyamoorte

sri venkatesha mama dehi karavalambam

Oh Sri Venkatesha! Your lotus feet are worshiped by Bramha and the other gods; you hold the conch in Your hand.

Your divine, transcendent hand is well-adorned by Sudarshana chakra.

Ocean of mercy, refuge of all, embodiment of good punya

Sri Venkatesha, please give me the support of Your hand!

Edukondalavada! Venkataramana! Govindaaaa! Goooovinda!!!

Lakshmi Mata is not a demigod for sure. Anyone who says that She is is mistaken.

Just as Sriman Narayana (Sri Maha Vishnu) is not a demigod, His consort Sri Maha Lakshmi/ Sri devi is not a demigoddess.

She is one and the same as Sriman Narayana and only appears to be separate. She is His Sri Sakti, and the source of all material and spiritual weatlth and He loves Her very very much. She has incarnated as Rukmini and Sita and appears with Lord Vishnu in every incarnation.

Namastestu mahamaaye sreepeethe surapoojithe

Shanka Chakra Gada haste Maha Lakshmi namostute!

I bow to that energy of the lord, Maha Lakshmi worshiped by the devas, who holds conch, discus and goad in hand.

vande padmakaraaM prasanna vadanaam.M saubhaagyadaaM bhaagyadaam.M hastaabhyaaM abhayapradaam.M maNigaNairnaanaavidhairbhuushhitaam.M bhaktaabhiishhTa phalapradaaM harihara brahmaadibhiH sevitaaM paarshve pa.nkajasha.nkhapadma nidhibhir- yuktaaM sadaa shaktibhiH

I salute the Goddess Lakshmi, who bears lotus flowers in hands, who is of smiling face, bestower of all fortunes, whose hands are ready to rescue anyone from fear, who is adorned by various ornaments with precious stones, who showers boons fulfilling the ambitions of Her devotees, who is worshipped by Hari, Hara (Shiva) and Brahma, who is the possesser of wealth ('nidhi') symbolized by Lotus and conch-shell ('sha.nkha-padma').

I'll give You two rupees for Your eternity;

I'll give You a rosebud for a word from You.

I'll give You rock candy for a taste of Your Union;

I'll give You my whole self for a glance from You.

How can a beggar bargain with the King?

How can I win Your heart with sighs and tears?

How can I be Your "friend," when I have seen Your smile

Redder than a hibiscus blossom?

Your smile tears open the heart

Of the Universe. Your radiant eyes

Cause Mother Earth to tremble in ecstasy.

How, then, can a simple country girl

Be blamed?

Someone cried for You, and You did not come!-

Or was she just blinded

By the tears in her eyes?

~Vanamali

Tonsure is very important at tirupati

1. it symbolizes giving up the ego before God

2. hair is sold for money which is for the God and the temple

3.

Tirupati Balaji came to earth when His wife Mahalakshmi and He had an argument (involving Bhrigu rishi kicking Lord Vishnu in the chest) and She left Vaikuntha for earth. Missing His beloved, Lord Vishnu came down to earth and wandered, looking for Her. He stopped to take rest in an anthill. Lord Shiva and Lord Bramha learned that where Lord Vishnu was and that He was not eating, so they came to earth as a cow (Shiva) and a calf (Bramha). They would come everyday to where the Lord was resting and the cow (Lord Shiva) would empty its udder of milk into the anthill.

One day the cowherd in charge of the cows followed them, curious as to why the cow was not producing milk. He saw that the cow was emptying her udder into an anthill. He got angry and struck it with an axe. Lord Vishnu stood up, coming out of the anthill. His lotus face was covered with blood! The cowherd was so shocked to see this sight that he died on the spot.

Goddess Parvathy came to the spot dressed as a cowherdess, and shaved off some of her hair, so that Lord Vishnu would be able to cover the wound on His head where He had lost some of His beautiful hair...

This is just the beginning of the story of Lord Venkateshwara. This explains part of the reason that it's so good to give hair at Tirupati.

~Vanamali