Should it matter?

July 27, 2004

This is kinda off topic, but I just wannet to know what the devoties think of this.

This girl, I really really like, and I have feelings for her, she says she does the same. Now that I really like her, I found out that she had alot of past bfs, and she was very sexualy active. My mind says, "alright, your gonne get some" but my heart, just falls into pieces, it hurts me when I think of her being with other guys, and the things they have done thogeter. And it hurts me alot....

What should I do?

Should I not worry about it and forget the past.

She is an atheised, and she is always very depressed. What can I do for her to see the supreme truth?

Are there any prayers for me to say, so maybe she can be liberated?

Thank you.

Kulapavana · July 27, 2004

it is probably wise to wait for someone you will have no doubts about.

Vanguard · July 27, 2004

I'm assuming you're "Hindu" (Sanatan Dharma) or Vaishnav, and probably had some prudent long term expectation of eventually marrying a girl of same beliefs, but then somehow finding this one you're attracted to.

You can't get hung up over her past boyfriends. Part of this distress you are feeling is based on a valid desire to find a pure, sattvic woman to enter the next ashram with, but the other part of the feeling is based on your desire to be the controller. You cannot control the past. The past has happened, now it's gone.

Give this girl a chance, but don't allow yourself to become too attached to her or the idea of a long term relationship until you two have reached a point of mutual understanding of your dreams and expectations versus hers. Perhaps through your association, she will abandon athiesm.

Many people found Krsna consciousness and Sanatan Dharma through their significant others. The trick is not to get too preachy, but casually express your beliefs, and eventually through sat sanga, and eventually sadhu sanga, you will see a great change in her, if Krsna wills to reveal Himself to her.