Jump to content
IndiaDivine.org

Santa’s a Woman?!

Rate this topic


Myra

Recommended Posts

I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe HE’s a SHE. (Peace be with you Gentlemen!) /images/graemlins/smile.gif

 

Think about it.

 

Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing, social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off!

 

For starters, the vast majority of men don’t even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve.

Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products,socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves.

 

On this count alone, I’m convinced Santa is a woman. Surely, if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.

 

Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there. First of all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead, gutted and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid wide-eyed,desperate claims that buck season had been extended.

 

Blitzen’s rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist. Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he’d still have transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up there in the snow and clouds and then refuse to stop and ask for directions.

 

Other reasons why Santa can’t possibly be a man:

 

1. Men can’t pack a bag.

2. Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.

3. Men would feel their masculinity is threatened...having to be seen with all those elves.

4. Men don’t answer their mail.

5. Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described, even in jest, as anything remotely resembling a “bowlful of jelly.”

6. Men aren’t interested in stockings unless somebody’s wearing them.

7. Having to do the Ho Ho Ho thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women.

8. Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.

 

I can buy the fact that other mythical holiday characters are men:

 

Father Time shows up once a year unshaven and looking ominous; Definite guy.

 

Cupid flies around carrying weapons.

 

Uncle Sam is a politician who likes to point fingers.

 

Any one of these individuals could pass the testosterone screening test. But not St. Nick....Not a chance.

 

A man’s got to do what a man’s got to do. A woman must do what he can’t.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

It always helps when you (at least try) think of yourself as a spirit soul, not the body (male or female).

...while the individual soul is actually "female" in nature, you need to understand what "female" and "male" means in the absolute sense in order to fully realize your true nature. all conditioned (embodied) souls have the tendency to think of themselves as "male" (purusha) and not as "female" (prakriti) - and that is certainly very obvious in the so called "feminist" circles /images/graemlins/wink.gif

 

this is not a joke. it is actually very deep stuff /images/graemlins/smile.gif

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...