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Am I worth of his forgiveness?

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I don't want to bother you people with all my stupid questions, but I am really new to this . What if you surrendered to krishna for a while, but then did something for your own sense pleasure out of peer pressure? For example, drinking alcohol or watching a pornographic movie? Was I fooling myself all this long, I feel so guilty after the act but was this like a test? or was I in illusion all this time thinking that I surrendered to krishna but really I did not? Can you help me here , I am lost and I do not know how to continue after this mess. what should I do when I am fallen back into the pit.

 

-Confused Neophyte-

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krsna is the all attractive.. if we are attracted by anything else, it is sure that we are not very conscious and absorbed

 

but.. no problem.. this is the world of difficulties

 

consider your fall as an advancement, now you are no more illuded that krishna is cheap and easy to reach

 

do not listen to maya who is typically saying that you are not fit to practice, that you have done a too big sin, that you have to stay away from krsna for not annoying him and so on

 

you are a part of krsna, you cannot be not forgiven because no one can negate or take away your existence that is, in itself , the demonstration that you (atma) belong to god (paramatma)

 

so chant hare krishna, be sure that this medicine can cure every sickness.. and associate as much as you can with the devotees of the lord.. and be happy

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krsna is the all attractive.. if we are attracted by anything else, it is sure that we are not very conscious and absorbed

 

but.. no problem.. this is the world of difficulties

 

consider your fall as an advancement, now you are no more illuded that krishna is cheap and easy to reach

 

do not listen to maya who is typically saying that you are not fit to practice, that you have done a too big sin, that you have to stay away from krsna for not annoying him and so on

 

you are a part of krsna, you cannot be not forgiven because no one can negate or take away your existence that is, in itself , the demonstration that you (atma) belong to god (paramatma)

 

so chant hare krishna, be sure that this medicine can cure every sickness.. and associate as much as you can with the devotees of the lord.. and be happy

 

 

Nitai-Gaura Haribol Jaya Prabhupada....

 

 

 

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Do not be so hard on yourself. The fact that you feel so bad is pleasing Krishna right now. In this material world there will be the possibility of so many fall downs. You will pick yourself up and continue on. That is what matters.

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Yes Krishna will forgive you if you truly repent. You have understood that sanga (association) is very important. You were pressured into doing these non-sense things. If you can try to associate more with the devotees of the Lord who's hearts are simply wishing to glorify Krishna and His devotees.

 

The more you associate with such devotees the more you'll be able to tolerate the urges to do sense gratification.

 

sat-sanga is the most important practical mean for any devotee to get rid of maya once and for all.

 

yours in service to Srila Prabhupada.

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