Hi Everyone

[Guest guest]

Greetings Everyone. Wow, first off, I can't even begin to believe my own eyes.

What an amazing group, or group of groups. I can't even believe that I have been

brought to you guys or that I have found you. It's like a handprint that has

been placed upon my life. Like it all fits. LOL, in the last 15 minutes, I have

just sat here right in front of my computer putting it all together, like I have

been waiting for this day, to meet you all. I can't describe it, so many things

over the course of my life are being explained to me (even though Ihave searched

high and low for answers before) just now. --through this site KAS-1 and others.

 

Where do I begin??? I can't even be sure, but I almost sure of it, that the

Kundalini was awakened in my life as a little girl. (I am now 31 years old) I

believe this happened through the use of " Compressed Movement Meditation " and in

the form of " the Holy Fire of Christ " , as I was brought up, a Pastor's child, in

a Born Again Christian church.

As I grew older, I had gone in and out of the " Christian " faith, but always

wondered about my " connection " as I prayed. I felt I could move mountains, and

I always felt it was different than the norm, so much so that I would find

myself in my room for hours praying, crying out to God, for myself and/or

others, and KNEW my prayers were being answered. There were many occasions as a

child, maybe 5 or 6 that I would say a prayer, and instantly it would be

answered, and in this physical world, if the prayer called for it. This

continued into my teens and early twenties. But I never abused it. The thought

just entered my mind, it sounds like I was a walking Genie, why not use it, but

the thought never crossed my mind. Anyways lol, lil tangent there, I guess

cause we were taught the fear of God back then. Humm, so to go on...during my

times out of the Christian faith, I dabbled, here iand there. I always had a

curiosity for mysticism, tarot, spiritualism, spirits, witch-craft, etc. So one

day in my early 20's I experimented with the Tarot, and lo and behold, I

foretold my entire future one full year ahead. No book needed. I don't know

how I saw what I saw, I just did. Somehow in the cards. At the time I laughed

at it, didn't know if it was true or not, but as things started coming true, I

got more and more freaked out. So for about a year after that I threw them away

never to pick them up again until one of the things they had predicted came up

and I decided I needed their help...lol. I have been reading ever since. That

was about 9 0r 10 years ago.

 

I remember things as a child, such as hearing people in my room when no one was

there, or little kid stuff, but I'll never forget it, one day I was at one of my

brother's baseball games and I was runnin all around in the sand, the parking

lot, you know like kids do, and I realized I had lost my charm necklace. (I had

this necklace that had about 7 or 8 gold charms strung on it like a keychain

ring) and all I can remember is that I exhausted myself looking all over for it.

It meant the world to me. Somehow I knew, If I stopped and focused...focused a

prayer, up to the Universe, the Universe would respond. So I did. I hadn't

even closed my mouth before all my gold charms started to glisten in the sand

from the sunshine bouncing off them. It was amazing! There they all were just

laying there glistening!! I just walked up to each one and picked them up!!! or

on a more serious and unfortunately sullen note, I can remember things like

crying all night knowing someone in my family was going to die (not knowing

who), going to bed feeling like I must have been crazy, and feeling guilty for

even feeling like this, telling myself I had to stop this crazy behavior.(I was

very young) But my grandfather, of whom we were very close to as a child soon

passed.

 

As I got older, these types of things continued. I could pray, and prayers

would be answered. When I was in the faith I continued to use the " Compressed

Movement Meditation " (dancing and singing in worship), it all makes sense to me

now, and when I was " out " of the faith, I would experiment with different types

of meditations. I remember once, and only once during a meditation (outside of

the faith), I had a very vivid experience, the most vivid I had ever had. I was

swimming, and met a mermaid, we spoke briefly, and then knock at the door pulled

me out of the meditation, and I have been trying to reach that place again with

no luck, lol ever since. (although I have reached a few new interesting

meditative states, although nothing like that one)

 

I have met the deceased in dreams, although I bet most people probably get that.

Well, I shouldn't say " the " deceased, only my brother. We didn't get to spend

much time together at all really during our lifetimes, most of it was as kids

growing up, but then one day I went off to the Military and well saw Him once

when I was home on leave about a month before he died. And that was it for the

most crucial 4 years (he was just turning 21) of his life. Well, I got to spend

time with him, in spirit, once we were in spirit form, another time he was just

as he was as his age before he died, and we got to talking. It was nice.

 

So many things. I have had one OBE experience when I was a teen. This was by

accident. Not planned. All I could remember was watching myself sit on the

couch at a friends house! Maybe I died that night and came back to life, I don't

know. To be completely honest me and my friends were doing experimental drugs

that night (Iwas a bad teen, lol) and think I remember them tellin me I

overdosed, but they never brought me to the hospital for fear of getting into

trouble. All I know is I never felt so good in my entire life the next day!

 

There were times when I was devastated from my brother's death, and I was living

alone in Connecticut, (my whole family was in NY at the time) and all the sudden

the phone would ring off the hook. Friends and family callin in the middle of

the night just to say hi, LOL. Times,I remember I got stranded on the side of

the road in Italy, lol, or made it through 2 1/2 hours of mountainside with no

gas only fumes. I remember that time I was stranded on the side of the road, I

was alone, in a strange country. I was sitting there for about a half an hour,

hoping someone would stop by, that I would see a friend (I was in the military

at the time) My cell phone was dead, lol, and it was starting to get dark. No

one, not one person. I made a deal with God, and I prayed, within 15 minutes

the whole city had stopped, no kidding! There ended up being a slew of people,

too many to be exact. There was firefighters and a fire engine, a fire chief, 4

of my friends showed up out of the blue, and a slew of police officers and

friendly passerby's. (???) LOL

 

and there's so much more, the list goes on and on, but there are bad things too,

well as of late. And actually I'm not so sure I consider them bad, just well

maybe life's lessons I guess you could say. I have always had a hard life. I

was dealt a " different " hand as of most. I didn't grow up in a loving

household. Yes my father was a pastor, but I did not live with him, I grew up

elsewhere in a not so nice household, with regular Sunday visits of course. And

well, to make a long story short, I can still read my cards, but there have been

2 main life events that happened to me that changed my life. My brother dying,

and well another one that is a little more personal that I wont get into here,

but both made me start to withdraw my energies from God and maybe the Universe?

Either way, I'm not sure cause I feel like that vital life force has left me,

and I have found myself asking unconsciously, how do I get back there? Before It

was a natural condition. It was nothing special i needed to do or be, it just

always was. Now I feel it has left or is gone has been gone for a long time or

a better word, not gone, but dwindled, and I yearn and ache for it to come back.

I know in some instances I closed myself off. First when my brother died, it

was the first focused prayer in my life that went unanswered. And I swear,

every prayer that I focused my intentions on, went answered. I am not making

this up. I know it's hard to believe it, but it's true. I can honestly say in

my life I have seen miracles. The only way I can describe it to you is that

there is a difference betweeen a focused prayer and just a prayer, I can't

explain it, It's like, you can feel like when your asking, praying what have

you, if and when ur on target. You know I knew the whole time I was in the car

to NY to see my brother in the hospital, I could feel I was not on target.

Something wasn't reaching, connecting. I couldn't connect. I havn't been able

to connect ever since.

 

I remember a time, it's like the Universe, or Kundalini has been directing me

here, molding me my entire life, for these moments, for this site, I can feel

it. I don't know exactly why yet, lol. But i remember this time when I was

living in Italy (this was back in 2000), I didn't even know what I was doing

then, but I was watching this yoga video today (this morning as a matter of fact

and she explained it perfectly) I would walk, just walk and hear myself tell

myself to turn right or left. And I would tell myself, ok this is silly. But I

would listen and turn. It started on a huge brick back porch one day at a grand

hotel over looking the Mediterranean. I remember it very clearly. I was

walking to the water, and something inside said turn right, then quickly said

now left , then right again. I was walking in circles, zigzags and to nowhere

in particular!!! At first I would laugh at myself, and just did it to amuse

myself, but then it became something bigger. I would be out shopping and

something would say, no dont go there, or, go home now. It constantly told me

stuff. So much so that I would fight with myself, cause usually I didn't have

sufficient basis for what " it " " whoever " was telling me to do, and normally I

wanted to do the tings " it " was telling me not to, LOL. UNTIL ONE DAY. I was

living in Connecticut a couple of years later and was going through a rough

break-up and ended up by myself at Foxwoods Casino. I was just about to leave

when in a clear voice something inside me told me " stay and wait a little while

longer, don't go yet " . I said to myself, oh no, not again. Laughed a little and

said ok, I'll stay, so I stayed a few extra minutes, like maybe 5, and started

to leave again. " Not yet " , the voice kept saying, " just wait " , I was thinking

this is unbelievable, this craziness is gonna have me here all night! For

what????? I started to argue with myself, rationalize, the more I started to

leave the more the voice spoke. So I went and sat down, bored, not knowing what

to do to keep myself occupied, or whay I should be occupying myself! I did this

and started to leave at least 3 or 4 more times before I finally decided the

heck with this stupid voice which probably isnt real anyway and leave, when I

made it halfway down the exit corridor, who do I see entering the other side???

One of my closest Aunts I hadn't seen in a while, but cool none the less, from

NY!!! Wow what's the chances of me running into her in Connecticut? Well lets

see, she lives in NY, and just came down that weekend, she had never been to

Foxwoods before, and actually neither had I, I usually went to Mohegan Sun, in

my opinion is bigger and prettier and has more things to see, but I had figured

in my depression, new things were always best. So at last my " voice " was

" proved " , lol. my Aunt, her boyfriend and I would up having a few drinks at the

bar that night, and spent the night laughing and catching up. We had a great

night. Had I not stayed, and had I left earlier as I had originally planned and

not listed to that voice, I would have missed her by a half hour at least.

That's how long I argued with myself that night, can you imagine?!

 

Oh yea, so the yoga video, the yoga video said this morning, that that's what

the breathe of yoga is for. Basically to bring yourself back into your

awareness, into yourself, to train yourself to listen to yourself, to train

yourself to become more intuitive. I had to pause the tape. My mind instantly

went back to that time in Italy when unbeknownst to myself I was training myself

to become aware of myself and become more intuitive. An unconventional method I

know. But who knew!! like WOW! That was in 2000 and we are now in 2010 and 10

years later, and I am now just getting it?! LOL Like I said earlier, I don't

know why this is all coming together now, why my understanding is starting to

open itself up and why I am starting to get answers to things I have questioned

for a long time, but I am sure happy for it. I still have so many questions,

and don't really know if the Kundalini was awakened when I was a child or if

these are just other things that have and are happening to me. BUT in any case

I am sure glad to be here and ready to find out. I am glad to be a part of this

great community. And if the Kindalini should wish to grant me another

awakening, I would welcome it with open arms, cause I miss The Kundalini so

much!

 

P.S. Nice to meet you all, and hope to see you all in the forums! Thanks for

taking time to read my story!!(PS sorry for my typing skills and jumping all

over the place, and hope I didn't bore you all half to death!!)

 

Hugs all!

J

 

 

 

**I was only briefly introduced to the idea of Kundalini a few years back,

through searching for answers, but didn't get very far, so here I am now. And

for this, I have also joined Kundalini-Virgins..

[Guest guest]

Blessings and welcome J. Welcome home; to the KAS family.

 

Love:

~Danielle

 

, " aprilnluv096 "

<terminij wrote:

>

> Greetings Everyone. >

> Hugs all!

> J