Guest guest Report post Posted September 2, 2006 It is true. Life is very short. Jai Maa! Chris , senka parks <swsaj wrote: > > it is so nice to read about people starting out. and askng good questions. > > so many years i thought i was spiritual...or at least following a spiritual path...and then i found myself looking at this person who was not really practicing anything at all except self deceit. and now i am beginning anew as my body is quiting. its funny but when i had my health i pursued spirit, but got caught in maya. in family, jealousy, pain, coveting...travel, education, etc. > > and now i have my children around me mostly grown, and i see them on their own unique paths,that they as unique entities have chosen. and isee they belong to something greater than me. we dont have control over when we leave this planet or for how long any one stays. my leaving will happen so i have had to let go. and to let go of relatonships. and to let love grow unfetterd and uninhibeted. which for me has not been easy. and more than once i have lamented very loudly. and become overwhelmed by depression. but i was lamenting what about my children? who will care for them? why cant i see my grand babies grow up? why have never found my soul mate to love? and the answere was a shower of love i never felt before. it permeated through out my being. my atoms themselves were in bliss and for one small moment i felt a peace and timeless bliss. that said it will all go on. no one is indespensible. but evry one has a purpose. ithink i felt that it was time to let Goddess...to let > God....to let the spiritual world lead.so that was my taste that led me to this group. but im dry as anything...like a desert! but i know that something exists that is so amazing, as to be indescribable. > > in warmth > senka > > > > Monica Thakrar <monicathakrar wrote: > Hello - I am new to this site too. I recently joined about a week or so ago and have been reading the postings. I feel similar to this email below, except I do feel the pull towards the spiritual. I do have a hard time however controlling my mind and knowing what the right thing to do is. I have begun to take classes in the Bhagavad Gita and have just learned about karma yoga, but I would love some advice on prayers, mantras, other readings to follow and feel more peace. Right now my mind is a bit scattered. I have similar relationship concerns as some others - how to stay in a healthy relationship and not get pulled by the senses. > Monica > > > > > senka parks <swsaj > > > Re: [www.ShreeMaa.org] Re: Making friends... > Wed, 30 Aug 2006 01:45:57 -0400 (EDT) > > i had just put up a pictuer of Krishna today > and opend my email to see this. > so lovely :-) > > i would have to say i am not the person i was so many years ago > and i was a very self destructive and angry person. but i feel out of > touch spiritually. like im detached and floating and just fantasizing > about being a monk or ascetic (sp?)...i want to be renounced > and not lament. i desire to see with spiritual eyes. but i just seem to end up > in the same place. alone and bound by my illness. no matter what i seem to do i can not see beyond my ego. and that is sad to me as well. since its this ego i have wrestled with and learned to tame. and yet spirit eludes me. i just cant feel it. but i do so want to...please forgive my self centerdness. i am at a point where i dont know how to follow my path. it is dry...and lonely. and i am small minded. > > you can see how neophyte i am. i know absolutely nothing about real spirituality. i dont even know how to pray properly or what to read. any advice? i can see the Bagavad gita is a place to begin. i thank you for this > > in warmth > senka > > Gary <aniruddhan wrote: > > > > this post spoke to my heart > and i appreciate the blessings of those who write in to this group. i do not write much as my hands do not work very well. but i read everything. and this spoke to me deeply. karma is an intricate and delicate force. i always wonder...what did i do and why do i suffer if i dont know what i did. why was my life so filled with abuse, and now so much physical pain with this illness?..and i often think i am so selfish and small to think that. and i should be glad i have the opportunity to "burn off" karma. but i still lament. i am still alone and hurting. and this makes me feel so much shame. > > > > > . > > > > I have asked myself the same questions in the past. Sometimes we learn the lessons we need to even if we don't realize what is happening. For example, intense suffering may awaken empathy for others who suffer, which can cause us to act in a more thoughtful and considerate manner in the future. Then we will no longer do those things that bring suffering upon ourselves. Another blessing behind suffering is that it can teach us to not seek our true happiness from anything that is external, including our relationships or other attachments. Some words of Lord Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita have me helped get through such difficult times: > > "Bring me thy failure. Find refuge in me. Let fruits of labour go, renouncing hope for Me, with lowliest heart, so shall thou come; for though to know is more than diligence, yet worship better is than knowing, and renouncing better still. Near to renunciation, very near, dwelleth eternal peace." Chapter 12 > > "Precious thou art to Me, right well beloved! Listen! I tell you for thy comfort this. Give Me thy heart! Adore Me! Serve Me! Cling in faith and love and reverence to Me! So shalt thou come to Me! I promise true, for thou art sweet to Me... Fly to Me alone! Make Me thy single refuge! I will free thy soul from all sins! Be of good cheer!" Chapter 18 > > > > > > > > Stay in the know. Pulse on the new .com. Check it out. > > > > > > Share your photos with the people who matter at Canada Photos > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest guest Report post Posted September 2, 2006 Some dreams come from places and people beyond us. I think yours was one of these; it seemed to me to be filled with beautiful truth. Jai Maa! Chris , senka parks <swsaj wrote: > > how do i ask? > i am very dry and ignorant. a beginner in spirit journies. > > i dreamed last night of a womans voice > she said > > why do you weep for your karma? > rejoice that you can give back what you have taken. > you can not remember, untill you awaken. rejoice > and you will find the real compassion.the unconditional love. > this can stem only from the unconditioned soul. let this fill > your heart, and let go of the obstacles, > for holding on binds you to them > > your thoughts > are your prison > but they are not you > your body is your burden > but it is not you > your conditions are your nature > but they are not you > rejoice and awaken! > > and i certainly did wake up. i believe dreams are our symbolic unconsciousness. and suppose that maybe my mind is trying to work it all out. seems easier said than done. but then so is recovery from illness. especially one that goes into remission only to jump back into relapses. but i am deeply humbled and softend by many posts i am reading. and also it is sobering to the self indulged mind i carry this lifetime. > > in warmth > senka > > > > Chris Kirner <chriskirner1956 wrote: Perhaps you should ask her....and resolve to do whatever she says. > > God bless you. > > Jai Maa! > Chris > > , senka parks <swsaj@> wrote: > > > > okay...so i just read this after posting my last mesage > > > > and you have spoken to my soul! that is what i actually do...i > wallow in my self pity. this is what i do the minute i wake. i am in > much pain in the morning, and it takes about two hours to get out of > bed. i take pain releif first and move so slow. and all the while i am > thinking about how i do not wish to live another day. i do since i > have family. but they will move on and will i still be surrounded in > this pity i have for this material self? > > > > i am deeply helped by this posting. and i do need sadana. but what > is good sadana? i used to chant a mantra. but was so rote after some > years. it became a chore and empty....my heart was so black. but what > is a good mantra? what do i think of? can i let my spirit dance or is > this indulgence. i have been led so many ways, and i only wish for > truth in my heart. and shree maa is this to me. how do i serve her? > > > > in warmth > > senka > > > > Chris Kirner <chriskirner1956@> wrote: > Senka, > > > > How do I, who have so many more blessings than you, advise you? I > > cannot hope to truly understand your situation, the daily struggles > > you endure. I can only offer that which I have, and leave it to you to > > do as you are able, and leave what doesn't really apply. Please > > forgive me if I say the wrong thing... > > > > It is natural to wonder why. It is normal to chafe under the burden of > > our karmas, and the limitations of this existence. But it seems it has > > perhaps gone too far for you, that the wondering and the chafing have > > themselves become the burden? > > > > You must try to let go of this shame and self-pity. I know (believe me > > I know) it is hard when such feelings have become so much a part of > > the mind. They constantly come bubbling up, coloring our every > > thought, making us miserable. They are not who you are - even though > > it may seem that way. > > > > The past must learn to remain in the past. This will be very hard for > > you, too, but it is necessary. > > > > (I feel like I'm writing to myself here!) > > > > You have not failed in your spiritual journey until you drop this > > physical body and stand before God and She says you have failed. Until > > then there is always the opportunity for change, for renewed effort, > > for grace. > > > > Purification of the mind and heart are necessary for you to be able to > > be happy and let go of all this. Put yourself at the feet of God and > > stay there. When your mind pulls you away, go back. That is the > only way. > > > > To do this it is necessary to establish a regular discipline. For > > disruptive thoughts and feelings I find mantra japa or path > > (recitation of scripture) very helpful. But puja is good too for > > distracting a darkened mind and leading it toward beauty and devotion. > > And always, there is prayer. > > > > Sadhana is a commitment, and it requires effort and time. But just as > > it took years for your mind to store up so much pain that it will not > > let you rest now, so it will take some time to burn all that up. But > > if you approach your sadhana, whatever it is, with faith and devotion, > > and practice it diligently, it will help you. It needn't be anything > > too complicated or difficult, either. Adapt your discipline to > > whatever your body will allow you to do. > > > > You might give some thought to perhaps writing to Maa or Swamiji and > > telling them a little about yourself and ask what you should practice. > > You can email them via a link on the main website www.shreemaa.org. > > > > I'm very happy you're here, and if anything I have written is of help > > to you, I am happy I was here to help. God bless you! > > > > Jai Maa! > > Chris > > > > , senka parks <swsaj@> wrote: > > > > > > this post spoke to my heart > > > and i appreciate the blessings of those who write in to this group. > > i do not write much as my hands do not work very well. but i read > > everything. and this spoke to me deeply. karma is an intricate and > > delicate force. i always wonder...what did i do and why do i suffer if > > i dont know what i did. why was my life so filled with abuse, and now > > so much physical pain with this illness?..and i often think i am so > > selfish and small to think that. and i should be glad i have the > > opportunity to "burn off" karma. but i still lament. i am still alone > > and hurting. and this makes me feel so much shame. > > > > > > i seem to always yearn for some kind of peace. to be realized...but > > in my mind it is pictured as a utopia. an inner utopia...maybe i am so > > off track and that is why i feel i have failed in spiritual life. > > where do i go from here? > > > > > > in warmth > > > senka > > > > > > Chris Kirner <chriskirner1956@> wrote: > > Saswati, > > > > > > Please forgive me for replying to this post late. I have missed the > > > last few days. Generally, I don't respond when the posts are > this old, > > > but your post just pulled at my heart. > > > > > > May Divine Mother bless you! May She help you to understand, and may > > > She help you to accept what has happened to you, and the horror > of it > > > you endure again and again as the images of it keep bubbling up from > > > within. > > > > > > I am not an expert on karma, so please accept what I have to say as > > > simply my own imperfect conception (an educated one, I hope). > > > > > > Shree Maa has said that nothing happens by accident. I have to > accept > > > that (though I admit part of me rebels at that). > > > > > > That said, Swami Rama said that karma is group as well as > individual. > > > This makes sense to me, since much of what we experience as > > > individuals reflects the state of the world we live in. > > > > > > Swami Satyananda said after the tsunami in South Asia that Bhur Devi > > > had shivered under the weight of the suffering in the world > (that was > > > from memory-probably not his exact words). Maa asks that we do our > > > practices for the benefit of the world, saying that if we do so > we can > > > make this world a beautiful, peaceful place. > > > > > > So, we have people in poor countries who are experiencing wars and > > > famines, who generally suffer a great deal, whose lives are very > > > difficult, and people in countries like the USA who largely > experience > > > the normal pains of human life, death, loss, and illness, but whose > > > lives are otherwise peaceful and easy. > > > > > > These two experiences of life are diametrically opposed, and yet, if > > > the sages are correct, they are linked. It is very deep, very > > mysterious. > > > > > > There are many people living, say, here in the USA, who seem to > me to > > > deserve to live in more difficult circumstances (closer to hell, > as it > > > were), and people in difficult environments who through their > goodness > > > and ability to inspire those around them seem to deserve a > better life > > > in better surroundings. How does one make sense of such things. > > > Ultimately, I think it is a matter of faith, until such time as one > > > attains to the consciousness of divinity. > > > > > > There is, however, one final piece to this puzzle of karma. How does > > > group karma interact with individual karma? > > > > > > It is readily apparent that one living in a poor place during a > famine > > > is more likely to go hungry or become ill. One living in a peaceful > > > place with a good economy is less likely to become a victim of > > > violence or other suffering. But individuals in both > circumstances do > > > experience the opposite of what is generally true of the group, > > > violence and suffering in the midst of peace and plenty, and health > > > and plenty in the midst of poverty and famine. These differences, I > > > think, can only be explained by individual karma. > > > > > > You asked: > > > it is pssible that in my last life I did > > > > something so evil that my I am now the victim of my own previous > > sins? > > > > > > My short answer to that would be "Yes." > > > > > > But I don't think it's quite as simple as saying you must have been > > > "something so evil". I think (remember, it's just me thinking > > > here)that our group karma (and group karma includes not just our > > > neighborhood, city, and country, but ultimately the world) leaves us > > > open as individuals to the experience of certain unpleasant > > > circumstances, even if we don't, individually, have a strong karmic > > > requirement for them. > > > > > > Remember, if the sages are right, we have all of us lived countless > > > lives, and so have a great store of karmas we carry from lives we > > > cannot comprehend. > > > > > > So, in the absence of any contradicting individual karma, we might > > > experience great suffering, simply because the world as a whole > > suffers. > > > > > > Think of it this way. If a man from a peaceful, affluent > neighborhood > > > in the states goes into a "bad" area of town late at night and just > > > walks around looking wealthy, he is likely to be robbed and perhaps > > > beaten or killed. If he had stayed in his own neighborhood it likely > > > wouldn't have happened. This is an example of group karma (violence > > > and poverty in the world-for which we all share responsibility) > being > > > played out individually, because of an unwise choice of > activities on > > > the part of the man. > > > > > > On the other hand, if there is a strong element of good karma in a > > > person, it doesn't seem to matter what her circumstances, her > > > surroundings, are. Nothing "bad" will happen. > > > > > > Take the example of a plane crash. All are killed but one. Who can > > > explain such an occurrence except that the person had such a strong > > > karma against death or injury that despite all the others being > killed > > > she survived without a scratch. > > > > > > On the other hand, take the example of a plane crash where all died. > > > How unlikely is it that an entire planeload of individuals were > > > "scheduled" to die on that specific day, or even that year? I think > > > very unlikely. It seems far more likely to me that none of them > > > possessed a strong enough karma for living to escape their > > > circumstances. Had they stayed at home, most of them likely > would have > > > continued in their bodies for a time. > > > > > > All of this may seem somewhat disjointed, and it is. I don't > have "the > > > answers". These are simply the various aspects of karma as I see > them. > > > Somewhere in the midst of them all lies the reality. > > > > > > I know that an understanding of karma will not go far toward easing > > > your pain, but it will help. Especially, I think, you can understand > > > that on some level your suffering is not yours alone, but the > world's. > > > > > > Post traumatic experiences can be very difficult. It can take a > long, > > > long time (if ever) to become "yourself" again. It will get better > > > with time, even if you do nothing, but one will heal much faster and > > > much better if she can open her heart and develop a firm faith and a > > > regular sadhana. > > > > > > You mentioned yoga and meditation. I think hatha yoga would be good > > > for you. The postures and the pranayama help unblock the flow of > prana > > > in the subtle body, which is also the vehicle for the emotions. You > > > can unblock the pain and strengthen the nadis so that intense > emotion > > > will be less disruptive. > > > > > > Meditation practice, on the other hand, in my opinion, would be less > > > beneficial that other things. You'ld probably do a lot better > learning > > > to do puja or practicing regular mantra japa or path (recitation of > > > scripture). Later, when the emotions and mind have been purified a > > > little from this stress, meditation will come of its own accord. > > > > > > I cannot answer "why" for you, except to say that in this world > > > sometimes we suffer. Should God have chosen another to suffer in > your > > > place? Are you any less, or more deserving than another? I > cannot say. > > > But this much I have from the sages, that God is not the cause > of any > > > of the suffering in this world, we are. Just as we create the > > > circumstances for suffering in this world, so can we create the > > > circumstances for peace. This is Shree Maa's desire for us. > > > > > > May God bless you and help you to burn this experience in the > fire of > > > knowledge and devotion. > > > > > > Jai Maa! > > > Chris > > > > > > , "sbramaswami" > > > <saswati_ramaswami@> wrote: > > > > > > > > What an interesting discussion. Thank you all for letting me take > > > part. I have a question > > > > regarding Chris' earlier thoughts on whether "bad" things can > happen > > > to a person and how > > > > to allow oneself to make friends with all experiences. I have > some > > > very traumatic, violent > > > > experiences in my past. When these memories come back up what > do I > > > do? How do I > > > > reconcile myself with them? I try to accept them by telling > myself > > > that there is a greater > > > > reason for everything, but I just don't understando. it is > pssible > > > that in my last life I did > > > > something so evil that my I am now the victim of my own previous > > > sins? It certainly > > > > doesn't bring me solace to think that I could have behaved > this way > > > toward another being. > > > > Also, I do not know how to feel about my offender. Is it right to > > > feel anger and bitterness > > > > toward him or the things that he did to me? Or should I accept him > > > and forgive him, as he > > > > was only a vehicle for carrying out my karma? When these > > > experiences come up, I feel > > > > tremendous sadness and instability. How do I deal with this? > Do I > > > just surrender to the > > > > pain, as I have been trying? How do I try to stop asking > "WHY", as > > > I have been trying, > > > > unsuccessfully? What can be the greater lessson in experiencing > > > torture? How does this > > > > type of experience help a person grow? I keep asking God whether > > > there wasn't a different > > > > way that I could have learned the same lesson. How do I "show > > > respect" to these > > > > memories, to this time in my life, to my offender? I know > that the > > > ultimate answer is to > > > > learn to detach from all of this through mediation and yoga. > This is > > > my greatest goal, > > > > though sometimes I feel I am so far from reaching it. Any advice > > > would be so appreciated. > > > > Much love and respect for all. > > > > > > > > Saswati > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Make free worldwide PC-to-PC calls. Try the new Canada > > Messenger with Voice > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Share your photos with the people who matter at Canada Photos > > > > > > > > > > Make free worldwide PC-to-PC calls. Try the new Canada Messenger with Voice > Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
