Pankaja_Dasa 1 Report post Posted July 21, 2006 How to be a Guru (Incarnation is Kali-yuga) You can present refutations thereof: No.1. Claim you know all Sastra, and it's Purports. Memorize 1000's of Verses, and repeat from memory. No.2. Gain popular recognition by mass amount of followers. Have them possibly (if it can be arranged) a title. Of Paramahasa, etc. No.3. (Most Important). Either claim you have no Guru, or say you are an incarnation of God. Nobody can say otherwise as it shall be revealed later in Sastra. (later so how can you deny it?). No.4. Get a TV Channel, for yourself. And say you're preaching about Radha-Krishna. (this should pull in the punters). No.5. Send of 'spiritual vibes' you know the ones right? Those orange 'Mayavadi vibes'? Those that enter your heart, make you feel like you have KRISHNA-BHAKTI. ? No.5 Sub. Tell some stories, make them up (it's not difficult). Spread and circulate. Make sure it's done in a nice way. This will bewilder people and make them think it's all true. No.6. This Guru is on TV, he must know about Krishna-Bhakti. Oh he speaks so nicly. Oh yes 'we heard this before'. We know this. Already. No.7. Get on Asasta TV. No.8. Read Books about Krishna-Bhakti (open a shop). No.9. Talk about it like you know it, all Sastra. No.10. Ask you Guru (who claims to be VISHNU HIMSELF) Avatara, to show you kindly His true form. If he say later, slap Him on the face. Then see what happens. If He shows then e-mail me. The Result? Congrats, you have a bona-fide Guru. Next stop.. Hell (according to Bhaktivinoda Thakura, it doesn't exsist. (read-between the lines). This text is available in Hindi and Urdu. Please e-mail on: Refutation: There is none. Your Guru is indeed God. (Vishnu). His comes here. He is actually God, .. All else fails. Shop around, for Guru. (have some faith in Krishna!?). idon'tbelieveitsnotmayavada@googlemail.com -Copyright, '0 Booktrust ' all Rights Reserved. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pankaja_Dasa 1 Report post Posted July 21, 2006 Conversation with a Guru; (cut down in bit size chunks). No.1 Your mentioned in Sastra? (yes) No.2 Which Sastra? (its revealed later!!!). No.3 So your Like Avatara of Vishnu? (yes) At this point, he will say either His Jiva or Vishnu, depending on the way you ask. Let's say he says his Vishnu avatara; No.4 Show me your form! Man (later!!!) No.5 Why later? (when the time is right) No.6 WHich Sastra mentions you? (later!!) Note that which Sastra question should come now. No.7. All Vishnu mentioned in Sastra already. (oh yes) No.8 Then where are you? (later will be revealed!). No.9 Okay, then why don't you show me? (later!!) No.9. Sastra? (later!!). So basically, in a nut-shell, he is avatara of Vishnu, and will revealed later (sasta and form to you). So basically his telling you that you don't need to goto any Sastra to find out. Or he will not reveal his form to you (meaning you). So his saying 'Forget Sastra, just accept on my WORD alone, I am God'. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest guest Report post Posted July 21, 2006 Also, learn some sleight of hand magic tricks. Produce valuable gems out of thin air. Produce "holy" ashes. Then when someone asks if you are God, say yes, then qualify it by saying "everyone is God, it's just that I have realized it, you have not." Make sure you have some bodyguards, though. Even though you're God, you have to play a "lila", in case of an attack by thugs. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pankaja_Dasa 1 Report post Posted July 21, 2006 Tricky, people fool innocents all the time eh? It's up to us (on this forum here) to stop it. March ahead Audarya.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest guest Report post Posted July 21, 2006 this is not a topic. It's just sarcasm betraying someone who has an ax to grind. I think there is a section of the fourm for jokes and humor. this section is supposed to be about sincere spiritual discussion. baloney is all this topic is. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pankaja_Dasa 1 Report post Posted July 22, 2006 - Anybody claiming to be Avatara, it has to be in Sastra. Sastra is given by Krishna, so first we must go to it. If the person says it will be revealed later, then he has to show his Vishnu-form. If he says later.. Then this means he cannot show. Because according to Sastra, there is no way a person can know this, without one or the other. Try it out. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pankaja_Dasa 1 Report post Posted July 22, 2006 Guru, Sadhu, Sastra. That's another subject, which I don't know a lot about. - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
