Dear One, from my personal observance, stop worrying. Feel gifted that you are inclined towards the spiritual path. Whether Lord Shiva, Narayana, Durga... they are all of the same Supreme divinities but in different aspects. You are a father to your child, husband, a worker and so on but you are still you despite the roles that you have to undertake. Likewise, the Lord has different roles in different forms; thus if you love the sight and presence of Lord Shiva by all means go to him! You can do all these as a householder too... leaving the family is not the answer as you have to complete your task duty before renunciating. Negative qualities would initially increase when you are seeking Lords help... but the truth is you are becoming more aware of yourself... they will gradually go away once you start your spiritual dicipline. Try meditation... try loving the divinity within you and your loved ones and even your enemies... that my friend would please our Lord to the brim!
Love All, Serve All
