shilp

Dear Vistiji, I have had hurdles in my personal life achievements and career path ever since the age of 18. I have never been able to achieve anything easily. In my personal family life there were always tensions. My parents never had a healthy relationship which is why I grew up under a stressful environment. My brother was the most liked by my parents because he had met my parents expectations due to his good grades in school, Engineering college and further moved to the <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" /><st1:country-region><st1:place>US</st1:place></st1:country-region> which increased their expectations for me. But being an average student and being interested in art and drawing they were not ready to guide me in that path of career. Most Indian parents I have seen want their kids to get the best grades and either become an engineer and a doctor. Times have changed now and so have most parents outlook but I wasn’t that lucky. So eventually I was like a disgrace to my parents. My mother was sick on and off since my school days and I always giving up on my career, job along the path. Each time I did something her sickness would force me change my path. So I ended up changing my decisions several times for eg: I got admission in architecture but there was lack of enough finance and guidance, I got admission in MBA again my mom’s sickness came up and there was lack of money, I got admission for my MS in the US but my mother’s sickness again stopped me from making future plans. <?xml:namespace prefix = o ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:" /><o:p></o:p> My marriage was not simple either. It took awhile for my parents to look for a better proposal for me. Just a day after my marriage my mother fell sick and had to undergo a heart surgery. So instead being happy about my marriage I had to attend my mother and take care of her before I left to the <st1:country-region><st1:place>US</st1:place></st1:country-region>. When I got married and came to the <st1:country-region><st1:place>USA</st1:place></st1:country-region> I thought things would get better atleast thereafter but my luck was not in my favour. No matter how hard I have worked to achieve a path and concentrate on my career I am never successful. I took a course in graphic designing, got good grades but had to quit half way through because my dad who was visiting my brother in the <st1:country-region><st1:place>US</st1:place></st1:country-region> had been hospitalized. My dad was in and out of the hospital for a year which forced me to make frequent visits to spend time with my parents and I had to stop my course work. Later since he passed away here my mother was devastated so I chose to accompany her to <st1:country-region><st1:place>India</st1:place></st1:country-region> and stayed with her for several months to help her settle down. I have been calling her to stay with me or visiting her everytime since 2002 and I feel I am not able to give time for myself at all. And I am unable to tell her I need to move on because I kept telling myself its my duty to help my parents. But at the back of my mind I always felt each time I try to achieve something my mother’s health doesn’t permit me to move forward.<o:p></o:p> My husband has been quite supportive but we do have a stressful relationship and we do fight on and off. I have never been able to prove myself. Also in our married life we have never had time for each other since he was always traveling through work. He quit his traveling job to spend time with the family and so that I could finally start working. I started working in 2006 Nov and took certificate course in HR and accounting but unfortunately had to quit in few months. So anything I try to start needs to be stopped. My mother had a severe stroke and I visited India to care of her right away I stayed there for almost a year and then got her along with me and till date am still taking care of my mother. Even now during her stay in the <st1:country-region><st1:place>US</st1:place></st1:country-region> just when I worked hard to get her health to a better situation she fell sick again and was hospitalized for a while. In between all this I take care of my two kids 4 and 2 yrs old although they are very supportive and keep me going I feel it is human to feel tired taking care of issues and being mature. <o:p></o:p> Besides when my inlaws visited us twice my mother in law had been sick and her health worsened. During our vacation with our kids to <st1:country-region><st1:place>India</st1:place></st1:country-region> my mother in law all of a sudden fell sick and passed away. So far since 2001 our life, our every trip to <st1:country-region><st1:place>India</st1:place></st1:country-region> has been eventful. <o:p></o:p> Financially we are in a bad situation, we are in bad debt, we never spend unnecessarily on any clothing, vacations but just spending on medical issues, tickets to <st1:country-region><st1:place>India</st1:place></st1:country-region>, has put us in bad debt. We had to sell all our stocks and most of our savings to help with all financial help and duties needed towards family. In the due course we have never had time for socializing nor do we have the desire to. Both me and my husband are depressed, unmotivated and tired of these uncertainities in life yet we maintain a smiling face and positive attitude towards our current situation. Since the past years of my marriage my husband has seen nothing but health issues in our family. My mother is still not in great health condition so I understand that there is more to take care of and in store for me ahead which is why I am not able to make any great decisions in life regarding my career either. I have realized including my mother everybody assumes I will take care of all issues. I even find it hard to ask my brother to take over and take care of my mother. Come april I will be taking my mother to <st1:country-region><st1:place>India</st1:place></st1:country-region> since she cannot stay beyond April in the <st1:country-region><st1:place>US</st1:place></st1:country-region> (due to her visa status).<o:p></o:p> Please help us and guide us because we think it is something to do with our stars or our bad karma. What do we do? No matter how good we have been in our duties we always face hurdles in life, finances, mentally and my career. It is simply my husband’s job which has kept us moving ahead financially. <o:p></o:p> When will I get a job? Can you please tell us what is blocking my way for my career and suggest some remedial measure. Do I have some shaapa? In the past even in a simple job that I took I had to work more than others to get the same recognition. Hurdles in the job. <o:p></o:p> When will I do a job and find sucess in career. Until now I am not able to join in any field. Will it continue this way for a while or come to a stop soon. I am already 33 yrs old. <o:p></o:p> Could you please look into our kundalis and guide us. Please let us know if we have kalatra shaapa or something else which causes us so many hurdles in life. I do not have my mother’s birthtime.<o:p></o:p> My birth details:<o:p></o:p> DOB <st1:date Month="8" Day="12" Year="1974">12th Aug 1974</st1:date> Time 1.20 AM Nakshatra: Kritika<o:p></o:p> Rashi: Vrishabha<o:p></o:p> Place <st1:place><st1:City>Mumbai</st1:City>, <st1:country-region>India</st1:country-region></st1:place><o:p></o:p> My husband’s birth details:<o:p></o:p> DOB <st1:date Month="4" Day="6" Year="1969">6th April 1969</st1:date><o:p></o:p> Time: <st1:time Hour="14" Minute="59">2.59 PM</st1:time><o:p></o:p> Nakshatra: Anuradha 3rd padha<o:p></o:p> Rashi: Vrishika<o:p></o:p> Place of birth: <st1:place><st1:City>Mangalore</st1:City>, <st1:country-region>India</st1:country-region></st1:place> <o:p></o:p> I would like to thank you all to spend time reading my lengthy description. I would really appreciate any guidance to help my situation.<o:p></o:p> Regards, Shilp<o:p></o:p> <o:p> </o:p>