sunken

I guess one thing I worry about is that when i do have kids, what do i teach them about the Indian culture. What do i tell them about "one man to one woman" relationships and abstinence before marriage...when i broke those rules of our culture. I feel like a hypocrite.

Thank you to everyone who replied in this thread. Thanks for your support. I feel a bit better now.

Thanks, Sreeram. that makes me feel better.

thank you all for your advice.

I will continue to chant the Hare Krishna manthra and try to put my mind at peace.

I am ashamed of my past. but what's done is done. I feel that I'm a bad person and a bad wife because i wasn't chaste.

My parents do not know. we are brahmins and my father helps out in the temple. I fear that i will get disowned if my parents find out.

I keep worrying that I will go to hell or be born as an insect in my next life because of what i have done.

By misconduct i mean i had a short-term fling with a man (before marriage )which became sexual. It was a no-commitment sort of thing. He is now happily with someone else.

My parents knew nothing of this. My parents then arranged a marriage for me with someone else. I am now married. I have told my husband about my past and at first he felt very betrayed. But he seems to be ok with it now.

As a hindu brahmin woman it was a very bad thing to do. It is weighing heavily on my conscience. I am worried that i have accumulated very bad karma.

Sunken,

 

Sashtras are specifying many prayashitas against etach sin. Better to consult with a guru for this

Is there any gurus that can be contacted online?

I would like to know, what prayaschitta/penance can be done to reduce the karma caused by committing a great sin?

In particular the sin of sexual misconduct with someone you are not married to.