Family relations

March 6, 1999

Tim Gerchmez <fewtch

At 02:08 PM 3/6/99 -0800, you wrote:

>We all have felt these feelings. We have all gone through the 'shunning'

>and unwelcomeness in our families and with our friends.

In addition to what I mentioned before (my mother's observations), a

literal miracle has happened between myself and my father.

I used to hate my father, and resented him enormously for the way he

"treated me" while I was growing up. I had a tremendous inner anger toward

him. For years (from age 16 until recently) there was either a wooden

silence between us, or constant fighting, screaming and bickering. There

was a point where I wouldn't even acknowledge him as my father. He "never

listened to me" and so in revenge I closed myself off from him and shunned

him almost as a demon.

Lately, I find that I no longer hate my father, or hold any anger against

him. Rather I love him deeply, and instead of a silence, a miracle has

happened. Now I find myself discussing philosophy, poetry, politics and

culture with him, sharing the beauty of life with him, and for the first

time in my life, I have a real, genuine relationship with him, and I find

that his personality is very similar to mine, and we agree on many things.

He has opened up to me, and I to him. There is a genuine and real love

there, and a true listening to one another.

Never in my life had I dreamed that such a thing could possibly happen.

I was ready to change my last name because I hated my father so much. But

then "I discovered" the nondual perspective. It has, and continues to have

a radical positive change in my life.

Such is the type of miracle that happens when ego gets out of the way. All

of a sudden, real, deep and intimate human relationships are possible where

in the past there was no possibility of them. I find this miracle

happening in my own life daily.

With Love,

Tim

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