photo for Shakipat ?

September 5, 2009

First of all thank you " e " for your input regarding shakipat.. much much

appreciated.

I am reluctant to post my photo.... mainly I am a fairly private person.

In my non forum life No one knows about my kundalin awakening except my beloved

husband. A few years ago I did tell my best friend some of my " stuff " and to be

honest when she responded with absolutly no understanding, which is actually ok

with me, I never mentioned it agian... and she never really asked further about

it. I am really ok with that.... I have this group to share my " stuff " with.

My best friend projedted her own stuff on to me and it was so far removed from

ny own experience I did not revisit.

So.... my difficulty is.... to post my actual real time photo, where any random

looker could identify me at the drop of a hat is sort of putting me off the

shakipat. If my closest friend does not get where I am at why should a random e

surfer.....

so...??? to you... is that ego ??? or is it a shyness to expose myself to the

random googling of others, which I think is actually ok.

Seriously guys I am very reluctant to post my real time photo. Help!

September 5, 2009

Hi Julia, I think your photo would be safe here. Only members of the group are

allowed to the files and photos section. If a person has no interest in

kundalini or even know what it means, they will most likely not join the group

in the first place. But if it bothers you that much, just take a photo of your

eyes only. Most people would not recognized you from just your eyes, I don't

think anyways.

Love,

Linda

, " jajahern " <jajahern

wrote:

>

> First of all thank you " e " for your input regarding shakipat.. much much

appreciated.

>

> I am reluctant to post my photo.... mainly I am a fairly private person.

September 5, 2009

it would be nice if there was a guarantee that your pic would be safe- but we

have had those who join who have gotten into the list and spammed members -

chrism screens folks yet if someone wants to be nasty they will find a way.

please ask chrism about a photo with your eyes only.

ego or shyness?? i hate pics of myself always have my reluctance has more to

do with self esteem - so you are not alone in not wanting to post - all for

different reasons.

i personally do not feel there is anywhere that is safe from those unscrupulous

folks who just love to make life miserable for others=

chrism will be available after this weekend

e

September 5, 2009

Thank you for the replies..... It has struck me suddenly, and I was somehow

unaware of this 'til now... that I have a fear of people who might know me,

knowing of my kundalini awakening. I have 5 sisters and I am quite close to 2

of them but even they have no clue about this aspect of my life.

Is it really just an " aspect " ? Is that how I really see it ?

I know there is no need to tell " everyone " I know about kundalini... but is the

truth that I actually want to hide from everyone who just might know me, my

Kundalini awakening?

If this is actually the case , and I think maybe really it is... then what is

this telling me, about me???

I would really appreciate some clear thinking and input as I am feeling a bit

upset just now.

September 5, 2009

hi julie,

I dont know if this is the same case, but I can relate to the feeling, or at

least a feeling of mine is triggered by your words, something I have been

wanting to post about so I'll do it here...

I have trouble admitting to others my deep interests and feelings, this is

something I have had in me for a very long time, it's easyer for me to show

something that is not me then to risk showing what is.

even for stupid stuff, like if I am watching tv alone and someone comes in I

have the impulse to change the channel, or checking out books at the librery...

I cant get myself to check out the books I am really interested in, because of

the chekout clerk that knows me.

but also deeper things... my interest in spirituality is something I have had

trouble admitting even to myself, let alone people I know.

though I can talk about it in general and express my thoughts on the subject, I

have difficulty in bringing it out as something mine, if that makes sense.

I told my boyfriend I am meditating yesterday.

this is a big big step for me and shows me clearely how far I have gone in these

months... it dident happen " because I had to " or because I was guilty I was not

telling. I was feeling very guilty for a time, I could not bring myself to

tell him I was doing this. I did it because I could do it, as in my stomach

dident clench on me, because I wanted to share it with him, because it was the

right moment.

I thought it had to do also with him, this block in comunicating I had.. I

actually thought I was comunicating just fine. that if I was not telling things

it was his falt, because of the way he is and do on..

well, I realized it is not so... it had to do with a very deep mistrust I had

since the very start of our relationship. I was constantly in fear he would

leave me, and that the way I was was not good entirely. and would self restrict

myself to a form I thought would be better. from the very first time I met him,

I set up this mask, I was in awe, I dont know why!

this is a habit, the masking, I formed from living with a controlling and

authoritive father, with my mom doing exactly that, restricting herself, and

from an extreme difficulty in blending in with other children and teenagers at

school.

my boyfriend has always sensed this, my not being free with him, and it

troubeled him...but I have never been able to let go of it, or even admit it.. I

felt perfectly good, nice and safe LOL!! in my little self built fort.

now I am realizing full power how very much this was deep, conditioning my very

thoughts...

that throat relese the other day I think was more powerful then I realized. it

was a turning point somehow...

yesterday I was able to talk to him about all this, to tell him what it is I

fear and most of all why, and then it all came out, and I feel so good, and we

are closer now, I trust him, and know that if he is not of the same opinion as

I, it doesent matter, we can talk about it!! and it feels so good, I can

relax...

and suddenly I feel this immense freedom before me... I can think, do, say,

dress, move, laugh, be silent, be interested, just any way I please.. I can be

me, and not some sort of carefully constructed mask.

and what astonished me most, and for which I am so immensly grateful, is that it

was all in my own head, all of it... and that everything is so magnificantly

perfect, how things come about at the right moment in such a perfect way...

but I think, retrning to your post, if you dont feel you want to tell people,

then dont do it.

maybe it is not yet the right time for you. I know it was not for me yet two

months ago, it would have been just feeding in to that fear, by doing what I

felt I was supposed to but I really dident want.

maybe you never will, but then maybe one day the full moon will pull and you

will find you dont care anymore, you will maybe be sitting on the couch with

your sister drinking a cozy tea and you will say.. hey, have you ever felt

tikles in your tummy?

but it will be the right thing in the right moment, for you, for her... for

whoever you are sharing it with.

you are not *supposed* to tell anyone, you can do so, and you will do so, if you

are called to, if it is right..

I am finding there are times in which things must simply sit on the tree and

wait till they are ripe, no use in hurring it, it will fall to the ground when

it's ripe.

please keep in mind this is all my stuff, and I am sort of high these days on

realizations and all this air blowing under my wings... so I dont know if it

helps..

I know this is just the beginning!!

love love love

lucia

, " jajahern " <jajahern

wrote:

>

> Is it really just an " aspect " ? Is that how I really see it ?

> I know there is no need to tell " everyone " I know about kundalini... but is

the truth that I actually want to hide from everyone who just might know me, my

Kundalini awakening?

> If this is actually the case , and I think maybe really it is... then what is

this telling me, about me???

September 6, 2009

Hi Lucia,

It is lovely to hear you are high on realizations..... much love to you and