ADHD

[Guest guest]

B " H

 

Yes, I'm like that too -- I take criticism VERY badly.

 

BTW, I thought I should mention, often with ADDers, we're not

quite " acting up " -- we just do things that appear to be behaving

badly. We're just responding to our internal guides and often don't

realize right away that what we are doing is socially unacceptable.

As we get older, we begin to put SOME restraints and constraints on

ourselves, but it doesn't always work, even for adults.

 

Oh, I should also mention, often when I'm expressing my deepest

emotionally feelings (as much as I can with words -- I find words to

be totally inadeqate since I don't think in words, especially the

heavy emotional stuff, I think in impressions -- ribbons of ideas,

strips of color and shapes flying in all directions -- over the years

I've learned to translate these impressions into words, but only to a

degree) my Mom accuses me of " being dramatic " or manipulative. I

really am neither -- I just really become totally overwhelmed very

easily and don't know how else to express myself. If you're son is

like me, the appearance of overdramatising might just be his way of

trying really hard to translate his feelings and thoughts. Often

words are inadequate, so emoting is the only way to push it past

simply stating and being understood. (Wow -- this is the first time

I'M putting this into words..... it's interesting at times just how

putting things into words clarifies things for me in a concrete

way... but I digress....)

 

(Funny -- while I'm writing this, one of those awful medication for

ADHD commercials is on the " tube " . I hate medication. I think people

do it for their own convenience rather than what is best for the

ADDer. I think the school system is failing ADDers, the Hyperactive

type and the Inattentive type. Instead of trying to encourage and

stimulate us, they try to drug us into submission -- I don't like

this at all. Benjamin Franklin never took ritalin. Thomas Edison

never took ritalin. Where would this world be if they had???? I

shudder to think..... Ok, stepping off my soapbox....)

 

Debbie

 

 

 

 

Good Morning Debbie,

 

He is, very much so!

 

Especially if he is being told he has done something wrong or hasn't

listened. When I talk to him about doing something wrong etc, I try

to sit down next to him and be eye to eye to him so that he can have

my full attention and I can try for his. As I talk, he will put on a

pouty face and then come by me and lay his head on my lap. He does

not take criticism very well (who does?) and I try to make each

encounter as gentle as possible, while holding as firm as I can. But

it's hard when he gets so upset. Part of me wonders if this is a play

on his part, part of me feels bad fer him and part of me just gets

frustrated.

 

I often find it hard to remain constant in discipline (meaning talk,

not hitting) and still be kind in a way to suit his needs.

 

Tis a fine line and one I must learn to find a better middle ground

on.

 

Thx fer your thoughts and yer help! They are much appreciated!

 

nikki

 

, " compugraphd " <compugraphd@e...> wrote:

> B " H

>

> I have been hanging with other ADDers (both inattentive and

> hyperactive) for quite a few years (I was diagnosed with ADHD

almost

> 5 years ago). It has been my experience that a vast majority of

> ADDers either cringe from being touched or crave touch. I fall into

> the latter category, unfortunately, my Mom falls into the former

> category. Fortunately, my nieces (my sister has 7 girls -- the 8th

is

> a boy ;-) love being hugged, so I go to my sister's (about a mile

> away) when I need hugs. Could be your son's like me....

>

> Debbie

>

> ps -- I wouldn't touch Rit with a 10-ft. pole