breastfeeding/guilt/second child/soy formula

[Guest guest]

I've been catching up on my e-mail...

 

Just my bit on a recent thread:

 

The delivery for my first child, ds, was a nightmare. I was on active duty in

the Air Force and the " midwife " was aweful. I wanted a gentle experience, and

thought that it was a better bet with a midwife. They were poorly trained, and

recently I brought myself to read the medical report and to be honest, I'm lucky

to be alive that I didn't bleed to death after they tore out the afterbirth

(mind blank on better term), I fell in love with my son and felt like we both

escaped death. Maybe this is how most first time births go, how could you expect

to know what it will really be like. Sorry, in advance, I guess this will be

long...

I tried to breast feed, with little help, and no lactation consultant, I was

just doing the best I could. We worked it out for about 6 wks, until I went to

work, when I was pumping like crazy hooked up to a double pump - weird, but I

was trying, then switched to soy formula. Recommended by my cousin, luckily veg,

who inspired me during my pregnancy also. The worst advice I did get was to just

stop breastfeeding in one shot, since my son seemed not to be getting enough, or

he just was inconsolable unless he was nursing, and I was exhausted as a single

mom living far from my family. Needless to say, Never quite cold turkey like

that. Worst thing I ever did for either of us. I don't know why I didn't ask for

help. I'm so stubborn and didn't know where to turn.

 

So second time around, with my dd, (she just had her 4th birthday Sunday!) I

did research and had the water birth I always wanted. I wish I had done it for

my son. (More Guilt) Luckily (for many reasons) I no longer am on active duty.

And felt more empowered to have the birth that I wanted. I had a Doula to assist

me, and she steered me to a wonderful birth center in CT, about 45 minutes from

where I used to live. And the midwives were awesome. If I ever had another

child, I would want a water birth at home. But as, hubby had a vasect. last

year, I am safe to say that won't be again. I breastfed my daughter for almost 6

months. Again, it was more difficult going back to work out of the house for

that my supply went down, even though I would sneak away to the bathroom and use

a hand pump, keep the milk in a cooler under my desk. Standing up leaning

against the door of the women's bathroom, to pump. But much less cumbersome than

the double pump machine, I thought would've

been so great the first time around. Funny how we can complicate something so

simple and natural. Well...

Okay, so she transitioned to soy formula also, and both children continued

with the second stage formula until they were 2 yrs old.

 

They still drink soy milk instead of regular milk with no problems. There is

always guilt involved, and just trying to do the best we can is a great promise

to our children.

 

Thanks and God Bless!

 

Janeen

 

 

 

 

 

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