funny story

[Guest guest]

(Hey.....this shows that we WERE meant to be vegetarians from the

beginning!!!!) )))

 

 

 

 

 

IN THE BEGINNING...

 

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli and cauliflower

and

spinach, green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so man

and woman

would live long and healthy lives.

 

Then using God's bountiful gifts, Satan created Ben and Jerry's Ice

Cream

and Krispy Kreme doughnuts. And Satan said, " You want hot fudge with

that? "

 

And man said " Yes! " and woman said, " I'll have another with

sprinkles. " And

so they gained 10 pounds.

 

And God created the healthful yogurt that woman might keep the

figure that

man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the

wheat, and

sugar from the cane, and combined them. And Woman went from size 2

to size

10.

 

So God said, " Try my fresh green salad. " And Satan presented

crumbled Bleu

Cheese dressing and garlic toast on the side. And man and woman

unfastened

their belts following the feast.

 

God then said, " I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive

oil in

which to cook them. " And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut

shrimp,

butter dipped lobster chunks and chicken-fried steak so big it

needed its

own platter. And man's cholesterol went through the roof.

 

God then brought forth running shoes so that his children might lose

those

extra pounds. And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote

control so

man would not have to toil changing the channels.

 

And man and woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and

started

wearing stretch jogging suits. Then God brought forth the potato,

naturally

low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition. Then

Satan peeled

off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and

deep-fried them in animal fats and added copious quantities of salt.

And man

put on more pounds.

 

God then gave lean beef so that man might consume fewer calories and

still

satisfy his appetite. And Satan created McDonald's and the 99-cent

double

cheeseburger. Then Lucifer said, " You want fries with that? " and man

replied, " Yes! And super size 'em! "

 

And Satan said " It is good. " And man went into cardiac arrest. God

sighed

and created quadruple bypass surgery.

 

And Satan created HMOs.

 

Amen