P.S from Kay. xx

[Guest guest]

A little later on saturday afternoon!..

Excuse me for writing such an essay again :)x

 

I have taken time to read through the heart warming replies a few

times over - I just want you all to know, this is everything I needed

to hear isn't it?!

It's not like anyone can take " it " away for me and it isnt as if I am

the only one with emotional issues - We all understand to some degree

I guess? It is our sensitivity to values of life that draw us to the

natural lifestyle perhaps..?

 

Bob - i think you have a gift for presenting ideas/thoughts in an

informtive and creative way - Such a blessing for all of us sharing

through this group.

Denise and Lynne - To be somewhat understood brings me closer to

feeling like I " belong " .

 

I know it may seem ridiculous that I am not undergoing counselling -

I had some VERY unfortunate experiences with the medical profession

previously and so inclined to stay well away from the free National

Health Service. (Comes back to " The Matrix " overview on life, as I

see it) One needs to be understood; these conventional doctors donot

understand the words " raw-foods " And that is only the beginning of

the problem!

 

Bob - laugh at this - Watermelon tastes yuk for me. The smell is

enough to put me off, and the texture. It doesnt seem to suit my

system either. Laugh again - because there was a time when I thought

I could " make " it work for me and attempted a 5 day mono watermelon

diet (no fat or greens) One of the worse weeks of my life (so to

speak) 5 days went by without poos, (Felt like I was going to pop) i

could hardly sleep, felt " sugared up " and generally unhappy.

 

I have experimented with mono diets for peroids of five days at a

time and discovered I do NEED to eat some greens if " sanity " is to be

maintained! I seem to do better with a mono " three-some "

Most recently I eat strawberries, bananas, pears and greens

(occasional change to tomatoes instead of strawberries) This DOES

help with the overwelming choices. However one's choices are reduced

over here, as you can imagine. I usually eat these foods seperately

except for the strawberries which suit better with greens or bananas

and the tomatoes with greens.

 

I think the bowel habits are either going to take time OR will

correct themselves once I have truly addressed that which mentally is

being reflected - yuh know the " not letting go " . My bowels are

damaged from previous herbal cleanses, enemas, foods, and other

related issues. I guess THESE are the areas difficult not to dwell on

because I experience the result daily, The mind sees it as " real " .

It seems odd that my bowel problems began ONLY as I took up a raw

diet some years previously. The misfortune could have been related to

following a living foods regime..

Dr. Tim Trader encouraged me to bear the pain and give up the enemas -

as I have experienced problems even after fasting. In my own space

and environment I'm sorry - I go " nuts " (whatever that means) I admit

to defeat.

 

Noone need try answer this; I guess I'm not really asking questions.

I feel perhaps I am experiencing loss of " hearing " - Not trusting my

inner voice in all the confusion and despair. Since I have a huge

sense of ONENESS amongst us - I trust The Universe may speak to me

more co-herently through someone else's voice - does this make sense?

 

I am glad that Denise has found useful the suggestion of affirmation

cards. i feel more complete to know this conversation has come of use

to more than one of us!

 

Thank you again for the time on this one - I appreciate it is a bit

off piste; I am attempting to remain as detached as I am currently

able and to present this in an upbeat manner.xx