Guest guest Posted March 29, 2005 Report Share Posted March 29, 2005 Hi Colleen What wonderful commitments you and Adam have made together, how uncommon and refreshing it is for me to see your personal list of DOs and DON'Ts. I see that you have a couple of posts, let's just take your questions as they come. There are, of course, many prior posts in this group that you may find helpful, but I'm not certain how easily one may search through such things. Elchanan _____ Colleen writes: Things I'm learning more about: *not yelling or speaking ugliness -- :-( _____ If I may, I'd like to share and observation and suggestion on this. Instead of describing what you do NOT want, or what you want to " get rid of, " perhaps focus instead on what you DO want. For example, " speaking calmly, with focus, presence, and lovingkindness. " Of course you would express this in your own words, mine are just for the sake of an example. _____ Colleen asks: I have a bunch of questions right off the bat... first, how long will we be dealing with detox symptoms (headache, diarrhea, dizziness)? I'm pretty sure the first week will be hard -- how long before we're all cleaned out and starting to feel the benefits of living foods? We're doing 100% raw as a 30 day trial -- is that enough time to start feeling right? _____ I suggest dropping the word " detox " from your vocabulary, right off the bat. Instead, I encourage you to consider a more positive, uplifting approach, one that you can hold and affirm for the rest of your life. Whenever you encounter some physical substance that is not a match for your body, your body will immediately begin to eliminate or at least isolate that substance. Right now, some such substances are already present inside you. Once those are out, from time to time you may encounter additional substances, in the air, water, etc., You body is always working 24x7 to cleanse itself. And so that is the term I suggest, cleansing, simply because it is accurate and, at least for me, positive and pleasing to say and hear. Philosophy and language aside, your body will cleanse legacy toxins to whatever extent you provide it with the raw materials and rest it needs to do so. - By " legacy toxins, " I mean those accumulated during your past endeavors. - By " raw materials, " I mean water, oxygen, and other nutrients -- fuel (simple sugar), soluble/digestible fiber, protein, fat, vitamins, minerals, and so forth, all in the forms and quantities that match your biological needs, - By " rest, " I mean not only rest and sleep in the typical sense, but also physiological rest. For example, as you learn to eat better and better, the digestive load on your system will decrease while the incoming usable resources increase. This combination of events provides the perfect combination not only for cleansing, on which so many have been taught to focus their attention, but also on rebuilding and replenishing every part of you. And this process will continue for as long as it takes for your system to become " clean. " There are things you can do to speed up or slow down the cleansing and rebuilding process. For example, you can speed up the process by fasting, but I do not recommend fasting past the second or third month of a pregnancy, nor while you are breast feeding. So that may have to wait awhile. Similarly, you can slow down the process by eating and living " less cleanly, " quite literally by continuing to eat some less healthy foods. Many people call this " transitioning. " One thing to consider and be self-aware of is the emotional side of cleansing and rebuilding. Most of our self-limiting habits, whether they involve eating or other activities, arise to meet some emotional need(s). When we begin to cleanse in any way (through RF, emotional growth, energy work, etc.), we begin to raise one facet of ourselves a bit " above " the others, at least for a time. At this point, we can either raise all the other facets, or we can find the one area of improvement very difficult to sustain. So you may experience many opportunities for personal growth as you progress. And I encourage you to perceive anything that comes up through such a positive lens, as an opportunity, not as a problem or obstacle. Finally, continue to ask questions -- particularly those questions you may feel a little " funny " about asking. People will always respond! _____ Colleen asks: Second, I have a 2 year old daughter, how can I make this transition as easy on her as possible? I am still breastfeeding her, so that will ease things for her, but should I continue to give her milk, etc? (Our milk is store milk, not raw) _____ In my opinion and experience, most people succeed best with RF when they move forward easily, with self-acceptance, allowing themselves to embrace new things that arise. In contrast, people often feel challenged with they attempt to use force to create change. For most people, the most common form of force sounds like this: " No. " It doesn't matter who is saying " no. " In fact, the most common source of " no " for most people comes from themselves, as they try and " get rid of " something or " give up " something. The things we wish to " get rid of " or " give up " are in our lives for a reason, they have served some constructive purpose at some time in our past. So in order to move forward, we must typically either replace the patterns with new patterns that serve us better, and/or we must experience the growth so that the underlying need itself shifts (or both). WRT your 2-year-old, I am guessing that SHE may be at an age where she is learning to say " no. " ???? :):) In other words, she may be exploring her own autonomy in great depth for awhile. And given what I've read about your goals for parenting and communicating, I imagine you wish for her to explore to heart's content, subject only to constraints to ensure safety. Remember that you and Adam are choosing this new path, your daughter may or may not fully comprehend or choose to " go with the program. " And your " kamikaze " strategy may or may not suit her. Therefore, I suggest that you approach her from a place of invitation without ANY sense of demands, requirements, or expectations, offering her all kinds of wonderful things, yet continuing to allow her self-expression and choice. Faith and patience will serve you far more powerfully than force, willfulness, and the like. One helpful strategy is to learn about things that might appeal to her. For example, earlier today I spoke by phone with someone else in this group. This mother has a young child who loves fruit but also happens to love cake and doughnuts. We both agreed that fighting with her over the cake and doughnuts is unlikely to prove constructive. So I suggested that the family purchase its first full-size box of fresh, wonderful organic dates. (There has been a lot of discussion about dates in this group lately.) The idea is that we can offer her something sweet and wonderful, and that eventually if she really loves the dates, they will simply supplant the cakes and doughnuts naturally and with ease. Of course, we can expand this approach to include other sweet fruits, such as figs, apricots, persimmons, etc. as the seasons progress. I imagine there will be something to share based upon this experiment during the weeks ahead. _____ Colleen asks: Also, I'm a tea drinker... I understand that sugar is right out, but am I to give up teas entirely? _____ I do suggest eliminating all refined sugar AND OTHER COMMERCIALLY AVAILABLE SWEETENERS as quickly and completely as you comfortably can. Instead, shift to fruits as your sweeteners, and experiment. For example, many people put lemon in their tea. How about squeezing in some orange instead, for the sweetness? Or how about dropping a date, a piece of apple, whatever you might enjoy trying, into the teacup, once the temperature has settled down a bit (so you don't damage the fruit). As for the tea itself, the caffeinated teas could go, if you drink any. Even more important, do let go of the DEcaffeinated teas, those are really toxic. And of course, the herbal teas are, as a group, the most mild. Eventually, you may find that you simply let go of tea altogether, but for now, I suggest that you do what comes easily and naturally to you, making incremental changes rather than big jumps. Ease and grace are important. _____ Colleen asks: And my husband's question, how can he make sure that he gets enough protein so that he doesnt' lose the muscle mass he needs in his athletics -- does he need to get some whey shakes just to make sure? _____ In spite of what has been marketed to athletes and physically active people, there is quite literally no substantive evidence that one's need for protein AS A PERCENT OF TOTAL INTAKE increases in the slightest with physical activity. When we become physically active, we burn more calories, therefore we eat more, and therefore we consume more protein. And that amount is always sufficient, even for a world-class body builder. Anything more is foreign matter, i.e., a toxin, and must be eliminated at some cost in terms of energy and other resources. Excess protein, even a modest amount, is actually quite toxic and places a significant burden or workload on the body. Most Americans eating the SAD consume about 16-17% of their calories as protein. I believe the number for vegans is around 11%. But a truly healthy diet would include protein in the range 3-8% of calories and no more. There is only one way to achieve this, and that is by consuming 85+% of one's total calories as simple sugar, in fruit. Many posts on this already, please write if you wish to receive more information. _____ Colleen asks: How hard is it to get the right balance of nutrients -- do I have to worry about " food combining " etc? Food combining is constructive, even for nonRFs. Posts on this already, please write if you wish to receive more information. _____ And finally, Colleen requests: And, would anyone please please share a sample grocery list for our first raw shopping trip? How much can we expect to need for the first week? Depends upon what you love to eat! One thing to keep in mind: if you choose the high-fruit, high-oxygen, high-water approach suggested by me and some others, then you will find yourself relearning to eat much larger quantities of food than may be familiar. This transition occurs because foods that are high in water are generally low in calories per bite, hence you will be taking more bites! Hope some of the foregoing is helpful to you and others, Best, Elchanan -- ---------------------[ Ciphire Signature ]---------------------- vlinfo signed email body (8672 characters) on 30 March 2005 at 07:17:52 UTC rawfood ------------------------------- : Ciphire has secured this email against identity theft. : Free download at www.ciphire.com. 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Guest guest Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Hello Elchanon -- first I want to thank you for replying to my questions so throrougly! I really appreciate that. Your comment on my saying that I don't want to yell or speak ugliness in front of my children -- that I should reframe that in a positive, uplifting way makes SO MUCH sense! With my daughter I always try to use positives rather than negatives ( " we color on paper " instead of " don't write on the walls!! " -- " touch nicely " instead of " stop hitting! " ) and it always has a more positive result for everyone involved... why wouldn't I use the same way of speaking in all areas? What a simple but profound eye-opener. Learning every single day!! I agree, cleansing sounds much nicer than detoxing, and has a deeper meaning. Today my focus is going to be on using uplifting words in place of what my habitual speech might be, I think that this will greatly affect my attitude and mood... and benefit my daughters as well. I will remember what you said about a *positive lens* and remind myself of that. My hope would be that my daughters will grow to do that automatically, without needing to overcome negative thought patterns. Yes... my daughter is quite adept at letting us know what she wants or doesn't want. LOL We want to allow her to develop her autonomy so we respect her refusals. We do not want to limit her experience of the world, as you said, except for safety concerns. We would like to make an atmosphere where she is free to choose what her body naturally needs, and doesn't lose touch with that aspect. As you have said -- I want it to be encouragement and not forcing. The idea about the dates instead of the doughnuts was a good starting point. I will check the past posts for food combining and other info...I may have more questions on that. I get that nuts and fruit are best eaten separately, is that right? I don't understand why melon is supposed to be eaten alone however... Thanks also for your answers on tea and protein. Colleen ~ Wife to Adam, my beloved and my friend UCbirthing, breastfeeding, cosleeping, non vaxing, richly blessed AP mama to Sarah Angelina (1/1/03) and Mia Catherine (8/23/04) " As a mother comforts her child so I will comfort you " [isaiah 66:13] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 30, 2005 Report Share Posted March 30, 2005 Good morning Colleen! I'm so glad we have connected in this way. And I truly admire the way in which you and Adam seem able to walk together in this. Many people face challenging family situations when they choose to explore RF, you are truly blessed, in my opinion. If you have trouble locating old posts just let me know, I have most of the posts I've written and can usually <tm> access them quickly and easily. Best, Elchanan Colleen Rivera [colleenrachelle] Wednesday, March 30, 2005 3:30 AM rawfood RE: [Raw Food] Thoughts for a new RF Hello Elchanon -- first I want to thank you for replying to my questions so throrougly! I really appreciate that. Your comment on my saying that I don't want to yell or speak ugliness in front of my children -- that I should reframe that in a positive, uplifting way makes SO MUCH sense! With my daughter I always try to use positives rather than negatives ( " we color on paper " instead of " don't write on the walls!! " -- " touch nicely " instead of " stop hitting! " ) and it always has a more positive result for everyone involved... why wouldn't I use the same way of speaking in all areas? What a simple but profound eye-opener. Learning every single day!! I agree, cleansing sounds much nicer than detoxing, and has a deeper meaning. Today my focus is going to be on using uplifting words in place of what my habitual speech might be, I think that this will greatly affect my attitude and mood... and benefit my daughters as well. I will remember what you said about a *positive lens* and remind myself of that. My hope would be that my daughters will grow to do that automatically, without needing to overcome negative thought patterns. Yes... my daughter is quite adept at letting us know what she wants or doesn't want. LOL We want to allow her to develop her autonomy so we respect her refusals. We do not want to limit her experience of the world, as you said, except for safety concerns. We would like to make an atmosphere where she is free to choose what her body naturally needs, and doesn't lose touch with that aspect. As you have said -- I want it to be encouragement and not forcing. The idea about the dates instead of the doughnuts was a good starting point. I will check the past posts for food combining and other info...I may have more questions on that. I get that nuts and fruit are best eaten separately, is that right? I don't understand why melon is supposed to be eaten alone however... Thanks also for your answers on tea and protein. Colleen ~ Wife to Adam, my beloved and my friend UCbirthing, breastfeeding, cosleeping, non vaxing, richly blessed AP mama to Sarah Angelina (1/1/03) and Mia Catherine (8/23/04) " As a mother comforts her child so I will comfort you " [isaiah 66:13] Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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