Guest guest Posted November 17, 2002 Report Share Posted November 17, 2002 Someone sent this to me so I thought you could use a good laugh. I do hope you enjoy this. It really is funny. God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's what I've discovered: I. started out with nothing, and I still have most of it. 2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran. 3. I finally got my head together; now my body is falling apart. 4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded... 4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded... 5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair. 6. If all is not lost, where is it? 7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser. 8. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the hydrant. 9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a few... 10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents. 11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids. 12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. 13. The only time the world beats a path to your door is when you're in the bathroom. 14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my knees. 15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does everyone decide to play chess? 16. It's not hard to meet expenses... they're everywhere. 17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth. 18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter. I go somewhere to get something and then wonder what I'm here after. 19. I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO YOU OR NOT! 20. Funny, I don't remember being, . . . absent minded... ===== --FEATURED FUNNY: A sign in a Pennsylvania cemetery: " Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves. " --TODAY'S BIT OF WISDOM/REFLECTION: " You can't act like a skunk without someone getting wind of it. " - Unknown ____________________ Post your free ad now! http://personals..ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 18, 2002 Report Share Posted November 18, 2002 These are very cute, JC. Thanks for sharing a smile. :-) I hope you are doing well. I am busier than the dickens getting ready for the holidays; a fun sort of busy though. ~ P_T ~ / Spring is a natural resurrection, an experience in immortality. -Henry David Thoreau, naturalist and author (1817-1862) , Jeanne Reiswig <r5c2j> wrote: > Someone sent this to me so I thought you could use a > good laugh. I do hope you enjoy this. It really is > funny. > > > God grant me the senility to forget the people I never > liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I > do, and the eyesight to tell the difference. > > Now that I'm 'older' (but refuse to grow up), here's > what I've discovered: > > I. started out with nothing, and I still have most of > it. > > 2. My wild oats have turned into prunes and All Bran. > > 3. I finally got my head together; now my body is > falling apart. > > 4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded... > > 4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded... > > 5. All reports are in; life is now officially unfair. > > 6. If all is not lost, where is it? > > 7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser. > > 8. Some days you're the dog; some days you're the > hydrant. > > 9. I wish the buck stopped here; I sure could use a > few... > > 10. Kids in the back seat cause accidents. > > 11. Accidents in the back seat cause kids. > > 12. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been > anywhere. > > 13. The only time the world beats a path to your door > is when you're in the bathroom. > > 14. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have > put them on my knees. > > 15. When I'm finally holding all the cards, why does > everyone decide to play chess? > > 16. It's not hard to meet expenses... they're > everywhere. > > 17. The only difference between a rut and a grave is > the depth. > > 18. These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about > the hereafter. I go somewhere to get something and > then wonder what I'm here after. > > 19. I AM UNABLE TO REMEMBER IF I HAVE MAILED THIS TO > YOU OR NOT! > > 20. Funny, I don't remember being, . . . absent > minded... > > > ===== > --FEATURED FUNNY: A sign in a Pennsylvania cemetery: > > " Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves. " > > --TODAY'S BIT OF WISDOM/REFLECTION: > > " You can't act like a skunk without someone getting wind of it. " - Unknown > > ____________________ > Post your free ad now! http://personals..ca Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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