On to the Next topic - Holidays - need for Creating a Safe Discussion Group

[Guest guest]

The group is called GoingRaw and I'm a part of it. I have been with

this group first since I started raw and only ate raw in the

morning. Anyway - I'm glad things have settled down.

 

So what's new in your life Em besides recycling?

 

How was your Christmas - or do you celebrate that? What do you have

planned for New Year's Day and doing anything different this year?

Resolutions etc.?

 

Louise

 

rawfood , " emusedmary " <emusedmary wrote:

>

> well said

> and I think we were all staying out of it to see if the 2 parties

> would resolve

> I did until

> I felt I had somethingto say when there was talk about creating a

safe

> group

> I just wanted to say that I felt safe and had no interest in joining

> the other group which I have not.

> i am not saying that it is not for those who have.

> And I think to clarify for Beth and any others-Elchanan created

> another group-I forgot what it is called ...as far as I know he is

not

> a moderator here at Raw foodss for Health & Happiness

> Em

>

> rawfood , " loulin3 " <Joyloulin@> wrote:

> >

> > This group has ov er 3,000 members... but ACTIVE ones are few.

It's

> > like voters in America - not many active and they have a strong

> > voice.

> >

> > I can truly understand the frustration of not being responded

to.

> > However I do know that name calling and hollering lourder

sometimes

> > gets us the opposite of what we want. The person we are tryiing

to

> > connect with shuts down. I would say much of this conversatin

> > shoulde have been between the parties off line.

> >

> > Perhaps we can agree if we have something personal and it gets us

> > upset with ONE party that we would take that part of the

conversation

> > off line until it can be settled between the 2 parties. If one

> > decides to disconnect then that must be respected.... I say on to

the

> > next... the world is full of people to connect with.

> >

> > Often a 3rd party can cause more confusion and add more to

> > disagreement than settling the dispute. I've found if the 2

parties

> > involved can talk - it may take time sorting things out -

persistance

> > is the key - then things settle down.

> >

> > Not always of course. The exception to this is if one party is

on

> > mood altering drugs and that can include any alcohol even

moderately

> > or even some foods can be mood altering.

> >

> > My 2 cents.

> >

> > Louise

> >

> > rawfood , " Beth Mouser " <mouser4@> wrote:

> > >

> > > Personally, I would like for this group to stay intact and open

> > > without moderators. Moderators may not post your messages if

they

> > > don't like your viewpoint or even have some sort of past " beef "

> > with

> > > you.

> > >

> > > I do like the challenges to various viewpoints. Knowing all

> > > viewpoints and sides to an issue, whether it is religion or

diet,

> > is

> > > something I like to seek. I do not like all of the ridiculous

name-

> > > calling either, but in between the slurs, I think there are

some

> > > valid questions being asked, possibly from a very frustrated

person

> > > wanting some sort of acknowledgment.

> > >

> > > Can't we all agree as a group that we will ignore Laurie's

posts

> > and

> > > questions until he starts communicating in a manner that is

less

> > > offensive? If he gets no attention whatsoever from these

posts, I

> > > think they will stop. Are we going to give him the

satisfaction of

> > > knowing he had the power to shut down or change our group?

> > >

> > > Beth

> > >

> > >

> > > - In rawfood , Terry Bakhtiari <pablobully@>

wrote:

> > > >

> > > > no one has to 'follow' him anywhere is they are happy here

> > > however, there has been a lot of negativity here and NO ONE

should

> > > stoop to name calling and such rudeness as has been displayed

here.

> > > If anyone disagrees with someone, great say so and why and also

be

> > > willing to say where your expertise comes from since that seems

to

> > > be often asked for from Elchnan. It can be done in a nice way.

I do

> > > not like the rudeness and name calling, that is all this says

about

> > > me

> > > >

> > > > emusedmary <emusedmary@> wrote: Terri,

> > > > of course we are capapble of finding things on our

own/findour

> > own

> > > path

> > > > but many hwere have been the victim ofhis condescension an

mood

> > of

> > > the day

> > > > which results in negativity and so does neglect

> > > > and then

> > > > where is the list of anyones degree-E or L?

> > > > i think that Elchanan too has said things to the effect that

this

> > > type

> > > > of knowledge can be self taught

> > > > see you have seen my post as an attack

> > > > why????

> > > > because I said I am happy here and will not

> > > > follow

> > > > elchanan

> > > > that reveals much about

> > > > you-

> > > > Em

> > > > -- In rawfood , Terry Bakhtiari <pablobully@>

> > wrote:

> > > > >

> > > > > this is exactly why many people sit back and do not post.

You

> > do

> > > not

> > > > have to agree with Elchanan or anyone for that matter but

there

> > is

> > > no

> > > > need for attacks and name calling which is what has been

happening

> > > > repeatedly. Everyone is entitled to how they believe is the

best

> > > path

> > > > and can come here to share it and those who choose to

research and

> > > > then either follow that or not is great. But when someone is

> > nasty

> > > in

> > > > their demands for answers who wants to respond to them? If

someone

> > > > angrily demanded things and calling me names then I wouldn't

> > > respond

> > > > to them either. And as far as the things that Elchanan shares

> > > here,

> > > > some of us feel like we are smart enough and capable enough to

> > > > research on our own to either verify or disagree with what he

has

> > > said

> > > > but DO NOT feel the need to attack or take up so much of

> > everyone's

> > > > time with all this negativity. And where is Laurie's list of

> > > degrees

> > > > and proof that she is right and Elchnan is wrong? I read what

> > each

> > > say

> > > > then research on my own.

> > > > > This has gotten ridiculous. Why can't you or Laurie or

anyone

> > > when

> > > > they disagree just say I respectfully disagree due to

whatever and

> > > > move on. Let the rest of us decideon our own without email

after

> > > email

> > > > of name calling and rudeness and get back to something more

> > > productive.

> > > > > Sorry this turned into so long a message but enough is

enough.

> > > > Agreeor disagree and let's get back to why we are supposed to

be

> > > here.

> > > > This isn't a debateforum. it is supposed to be a place where

many

> > > have

> > > > chosen different paths and they share with all and then we

decide

> > > if

> > > > we agree or disagree. But who wants to share here when you

are

> > > going

> > > > to be attacked constantly. I am no expert in rawfoods but I

am

> > > capable

> > > > of research and making decisions for what is best for my own

> > > health.

> > > > >

> > > > > emusedmary <emusedmary@> wrote:

> > > > > -Elchanan,

> > > > > since I have been rejected from your path of health group

> > opting

> > > out

> > > > > of having (your version of)the spanish inquisition'i will

not

> > > follow

> > > > > you anywhere

> > > > > If you start a new group because you want to feel safe from

> > > having to

> > > > > answer someone's very direct questions~

> > > > > then fine start that group

> > > > > start as many that will make you feel loved

> > > > > I don't know that you have discovered the unconditional kind

> > > > > anyway I was waiting for you to come outof your corner and

> > answer

> > > > > Lauries questions.....

> > > > > what I saw was you opting out-

> > > > > opting out is always a choice

> > > > > i realize

> > > > > buti never felt anger from laurie's posts

> > > > > just her wanting some logical answers instead of some

thread

> > that

> > > > > would glorify you

> > > > > good luck with your new list

> > > > > Em-- In rawfood , " Elchanan " <Elchanan@>

wrote:

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Greetings everyone,

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I write this message with mixed feelings about the past

and

> > > warm

> > > > > enthusiasm

> > > > > > regarding the future.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Since I first learned of this Raw Food discussion group

> > nearly

> > > 3

> > > > > years ago,

> > > > > > I have watched with great joy as many, many people

> > experienced

> > > this

> > > > > place as

> > > > > > an excellent entry point into the world of raw food and,

in a

> > > larger

> > > > > sense,

> > > > > > to new approaches to healthful living. At the same time,

I

> > have

> > > > > watched at

> > > > > > times with a great sense of sadness and disappointment as

I

> > > see one

> > > > > or two

> > > > > > people create an atmosphere that causes others to go

silent.

> > > Now is

> > > > > not the

> > > > > > first time, but now is the worst I've seen, in my own

> > > experience.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > The moderators of this Raw Food group apparently choose

to

> > > moderate in

> > > > > > absentia. That is their right. But I see a clear need for

a

> > > group

> > > > > that is

> > > > > > wide open to newcomers and experienced RFs alike AND that

> > > feels just

> > > > > plain

> > > > > > safe. So in the background, several of us have been

discussing

> > > > > formation of

> > > > > > a new group, one with similar goals as this one, but one

that

> > > is

> > > > > > well-moderated for safety and basic respect and kindness.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > So I'd like to share my idea, to see what others may

> > think ...

> > > and

> > > > > invite

> > > > > > you all to join.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > 1. The name of the new group is Going Raw, to capture the

> > idea

> > > that

> > > > > we are

> > > > > > all always transitioning in some way, that we are all

always

> > > on a

> > > > > journey,

> > > > > > each at his/her own place along the way.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > 2. Moderation takes a certain commitment of time and

energy.

> > > > > Eventually, no

> > > > > > matter how good someone's intentions are, most people

become

> > > weary of

> > > > > > moderating, particularly in a group of this size.

Therefore, I

> > > > > propose that

> > > > > > people from the group volunteer to serve as moderators

for 3

> > > months,

> > > > > then

> > > > > > pass the baton to others. Janet FitzGerald has

volunteered to

> > > take

> > > > > on a lead

> > > > > > role during this formative period and to stick around for

the

> > > long

> > > > term.

> > > > > > Several others have already volunteered to serve for a 3-

month

> > > > > period, and I

> > > > > > feel confident that we'll always have people willing to

do

> > so.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > As long as we have 2-3 active moderators at any point in

> > time,

> > > then

> > > > > there is

> > > > > > never a problem if one moderator is busy, traveling, or

the

> > > like.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Who can volunteer? Absolutely anyone ... it would truly

be an

> > > act of

> > > > > > service!!! We can train anyone to be a moderator, it's

easy,

> > > even

> > > > > for the

> > > > > > " technically constrained " among us. :)

> > > > > >

> > > > > > How can you volunteer? Simple ... just write to

> > > > > > GoingRaw-owner and let us know you'd like

to

> > > help

> > > > out.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > If you wish to try out this solution, just click on

> > > > > > <http://health.GoingRaw/>

> > > > > > http://health.GoingRaw/, then

click on

> > > the Join

> > > > > > button. We monitor all requests to join the group. For

> > > everyone here

> > > > > (with

> > > > > > one or two obvious exceptions), just type something

> > > like " Coming

> > > > > from the

> > > > > > Raw Food group " and we'll understand and approve you

right

> > > away.

> > > > > >

> > > > > > I invite your feedback about this solution, whether here

in

> > the

> > > > group or

> > > > > > privately at GoingRaw-owner Meanwhile,

let's

> > > just

> > > > > begin!!!

> > > > > >

> > > > > > Best to all,

> > > > > > Elchanan

> > > > > >

> > > > > > PS: One more point. Most of you are aware that I am

involved

> > in

> > > > another

> > > > > > group called PathOfHealth, and you may wonder if this new

> > > group will

> > > > > turn

> > > > > > out to be a clone of that one. The answer is " no " . This

new

> > > group will

> > > > > > preserve the general intent of the existing Raw Food

group

> > > (perhaps

> > > > > updated

> > > > > > with a tweak here or there) to provide an open, entry-

level

> > > > > discussion forum

> > > > > > about raw food, health, and the like. It's all described

on

> > > the home

> > > > > page.

> > > > > > And sharing the moderating role will only help to

preserve the

> > > > > openness of

> > > > > > the group, over time.

> > > > > >

> > > > > >

> > > > > >