Succeeding with RF: Socializing with SAD-eaters ... Dinner at a friend's home

[Guest guest]

Hi Lynne,

 

From my perspective, there is a huge paradigm shift available here: We

cannot " offend " anyone. Your friends can choose to take what you do

personally, or they can choose to respect your choices, though different

from their own. You can choose to eat what they make, or to honor your own

choices, values, and needs. I promise you that the friends most worth

having, in the long run, are those that respect you and your choices, and

those with whom you can live in accordance with those choices.

 

That having been said, I do, in part, as you did. I make a large dish that I

will eat, large enough to share. Actually, I usually make 2 such dishes,

especially for a " feast " such as Rosh Hashanah dinner. One dish will be

fruit, the other salad. I fill my plate completely with the fruit, eat it at

my own pace, enjoy the conversation, then when I feel ready, I fill my plate

with the salad. Sometimes, I eat fruit an hour or so before I go, and just

eat a small portion of fruit at the event, followed by a large salad

(usually 2 portions, because the plates are flat and won't hold nearly

enough salad).

 

AT times in the past, if I felt genuinely interested in a particular item, I

may have taken a bite ... that is singular ... of something someone else has

prepared. But honestly, I never enjoyed how I felt afterward ... the taste

and mucus in my mouth, the mucus in my upper respiratory system, etc.

 

And if anyone ever says anything such as your friends did, I simply explain

to them that, were I to eat their food, I would have had such a reaction,

and that I hope they do not wish that upon me. I tell them that I value

their friendship, their companionship, as I hope they value mine, me, and

not what I eat. I tell them that I value them as themselves, not for any

food they may ever make. I keep it brief, and I find that this is

sufficient.

 

Hope this helps!

Elchanan

_____

 

rawfood [rawfood ] On Behalf Of

Lynne Moore

Friday, September 21, 2007 11:59 AM

rawfood

Re: [Raw Food] Succeeding with RF: Socializing with SAD-eaters

(WAS: Killing vs. Murder: Hormonal and Behavioral Effects of Eating Animals)

 

 

Hi Janet,

 

Since you brought up about watching other SAD counterparts eating cooked

flesh, I thought I would throw a question out to the group. Last week, we

started the celebration of our Jewish New Year, Rosh Hashanah. We were

invited to my best friend's house for a big Rosh Hashanah dinner. Even

though they both KNEW that my diet consisted of raw fruits and vegetables

(and they were sure to include these in their menu for the dinner plus I

brought a huge fruit salad), they made it very clear afterwards that they

would have been insulted if I hadn't eaten ANY of their prepared food. I

did taste a few of their appetizers and side dishes, and when I told them

this, they were extremely happy. I was telling them that I just couldn't

resist and that I just had to go off of my diet. They said that I shouldn't

feel guilty and that they are very happy that I indulged in their delicious

food. I was wondering how everyone " handles " going to someone's house for

dinner, especially a holiday dinner. How do you stay on your raw vegan low

fat diet WITHOUT offending anyone?

 

Thanks,

Lynne