O/T Joke: Top 10 answering machine messages

[Guest guest]

I vote for number 9....

 

10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave

your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

 

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving

messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their

carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need

their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home

phone number and they will get back to you.

 

8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic

thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your

number, and your reason for calling.... and I'll think about returning

your call.

 

7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator.

Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one

of these magnets.

 

6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the

money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you

didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If

you are a female, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.

 

5. A is for - a fun time, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why

we're not here. So, leave a message.

 

4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a

" sexy " message, I'll call sooner.

 

3. Hi. Now YOU say something.

 

2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave

me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

 

1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right

now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it

up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave

a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.

[Guest guest]

roflmao, i loved 3, 7, and 8 ....think i may just use them sometime.....lol

 

________________________________

 

on behalf of Carol Pearce

Thu 7/14/2005 6:48 AM

 

O/T Joke: Top 10 answering machine messages

 

 

 

I vote for number 9....

 

10. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave

your name and number, we'll get back to you as soon as we're finished.

 

9. Hello, you are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving

messages. My owners do not need siding, windows or a hot tub, and their

carpets are clean. They give to charity at the office and don't need

their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and home

phone number and they will get back to you.

 

8. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic

thought-recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your

number, and your reason for calling.... and I'll think about returning

your call.

 

7. Hi! John's answering machine is broken. This is his refrigerator.

Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one

of these magnets.

 

6. Hi. This is John: If you are the phone company, I already sent the

money. If you are my parents, please send money. If you are my bank, you

didn't lend me enough money. If you are my friends, you owe me money. If

you are a female, don't worry, I have LOTS of money.

 

5. A is for - a fun time, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why

we're not here. So, leave a message.

 

4. Hello! If you leave a message, I'll call you soon. If you leave a

" sexy " message, I'll call sooner.

 

3. Hi. Now YOU say something.

 

2. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave

me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.

 

1. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right

now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it

up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave

a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth, we'll call you back.

[Guest guest]

LOL Those were the best LOL Loved them:)

 

 

 

 

[Guest guest]

I like my mothers " What Fresh Hell is THIS?!!

 

ROFL!

 

K

 

>

 

 

--

Cheers!

Kathleen Petrides

The Woobey Queen

Http://www.woobeyworld.com