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RE: Need Help with Attention and Focusing/long reply

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Hey there!

 

I can imagine how discouraging it is with

your son to be hearing negative things about him. I don’t know that anything I have

to say will help or not help, but here it goes. J

 

My son (my oldest) is very busy. He doesn’t really forget facts and

things, in fact he is SUPER intelligent (as your son is I am SURE) but he does

forget things that aren’t important to him, or when he is in a

hurry. He hasn’t ever been

the type of kid that can sit still for any amount of time (neither am I as a

matter of fact) and I knew he would never survive in public school and chose to

keep him home. I am of course

biased toward home schooling because I myself was home schooled. I loved every minute of it! My mother sent me to kindergarten and to

first grade and then kept me home until Jr. High when the grades all

combined. Just a little back

ground, because then that’s what we have chosen to do and it’s

familiar to me.

 

Anyway, he hasn’t ever really

struggled with studies, but he doesn’t ever know he is learning

either J We just move around

while we are learning. We attend a

church that is a 3 hour length and he has struggled with making good choices

(along with being quiet) for those 3 hours. Now, they aren’t required to sit

still like a statue or anything, but they are to not talk out of turn or run or

touch/bother their neighbors. I am

thankful for the experience to see that the boys that are in public school seem

to struggle with it just as much as he does. HOWEVER, because he is “home

schooled” I had several people who thought/think he is ADHD or whatever

the latest thing is. I did in fact

take him to the top neurologist here (knowing I too would NEVER medicate him)

and found that guess what? He is

super smart and that there is NO place for him in the public school system! (that’s what the Dr. thought, not just us!) He said that he either should be home

schooled OR sent to a private school and there were only 2 private schools (all

far away) that he would recommend.

He said that there could be some sensory issues, but we took him to the

occupational therapist and they evaluated him and decided against that

too. But, we have had STILL a lot

of comments about his “behavior” which is really ironic because it

seems like many people’s kids are struggling!

 

There are some really great books on

different types of “smart” and how to really utilize them and how

to help your children find their own “smarts” and to develop the “smarts”

that are weaker. If you are

interested in those books feel free to email me and I will be happy to send you

the ones I have.

 

I also do something with my children

called “brain-dance” which has given us amazing results. There are books on this as well. It’s based on “brain gym”

which is so beneficial for waking up both sides of the brain.

 

So, I guess what I am saying is: stick to

your guns! You know your

child. You have been given the

stewardship over him and if you choose to you can take him to the Dr. and

decide if meds are something you would consider (which I see you wouldn’t

and neither would I) or simply to make people be quiet.

 

Sometimes when my children OR *I* go into a stressful situation or are

going to, we have had good success with Dr. Christopher’s mind trac. (the children’s version is kid-e-trac)

This really helps with my children’s

ability to stay emotionally grounded through things that are hard to be

flexible with.

 

I also give my son a few drops of the relaxe-eze (again Dr. Christopher’s) at night if he

has a really hard time going to sleep.

I don’t want him to be dependant on it either. We have also found that if we don’t

do our “bedtime routine” that he isn’t able to go to sleep as

easily. Really, none of my kids

are. So, our bedtime routine as

simple as it sounds is dinner, pick up, pj’s,

teeth brusing, scripture reading, prayer and then bed

time. If they get it done in time,

they get extra reading time before lights out, if not well…then lights

out and they go to bed. Also, Jim

Weiss has a couple of great night time CDs that do a guided imagery/relaxation

type thing that my 9 year old (who can keep himself awake through almost

anything) that he can’t stay awake to hear the last one. Little does he know, he hasn’t

ever made it past the THIRD one. They are all about 10-12 minutes

long.

 

Sorry this is so long. I hope that it isn’t too much off

topic for everyone!

 

 

Hugs!

Melanie Harper

Bradley Method Natural Childbirth Educator

Duvall, WA

Educator of a 9 year old lego genius, a 7 year old ballerina and a 2 year old

Houdini!

“Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way if

they get angry, they'll be a mile away and barefoot”

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