Guest guest Posted June 13, 2004 Report Share Posted June 13, 2004 From my girlfriend, who knows I'm placing an internet personal ad.. Carol > > DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS: > > 40-ish.............................................49 > > Adventurous.................Slept with everyone > > Athletic......................................No boobs > > Average looking....................Ugly > > Beautiful...........................Pathological liar > > Contagious Smile..................Does a lot of pills > > Emotionally Secure......................On medication > > Feminist..........................................Fat > > Free spirit....................................Junkie > > Friendship first..........................Former slut > > Fun..........................................Annoying > > New-Age..............Body hair in the wrong places > > Old-fashioned.............................No BJs > > Open-minded.................................Desperate > > Outgoing........................Loud and Embarrassing > > Passionate...............................Sloppy drunk > > Professional....................................Bitch > > Voluptuous...................................Very Fat > > Large frame.................................Hugely Fat > > Wants Soul mate...............................Stalker > > > WOMEN'S ENGLISH: > > 1. Yes = No > > 2. No = Yes > > 3. Maybe = No > > 4. We need = I want.. > > 5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry > > 6. We need to talk = You're in trouble > > 7. Sure, go ahead = You better not > > 8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later > > 9. I am not upset = Of course I am upset, you moron! > > 10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think about? > > MEN'S ENGLISH: > > 1. I am hungry = I am hungry > > 2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy > > 3. I am tired = I am tired > > 4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage! > > 5. I love you = Let's have sex now > > 6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex? > > 7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you > > 8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you > > 9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you > > 10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you > > 11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay > > --- > Incoming mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.705 / Virus Database: 461 - Release 6/12/2004 > > --- > Outgoing mail is certified Virus Free. > Checked by AVG anti-virus system (http://www.grisoft.com). > Version: 6.0.705 / Virus Database: 461 - Release 6/12/2004 > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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