Why is it Particularly Effective When Doing EFT to Give Yourself Permission to

[Guest guest]

Why is it Particularly Effective When Doing EFT

to Give Yourself Permission to Change?

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Gene is an EFT practitioner in Baltimore, MD, and author of numerous

articles on EFT that appear regularly on his website _http://eftQandA.com_

(http://eftqanda.com/) . He can be e-mailed directly at

_gene_

(gene) .

When I was working with a client today she asked me a question that caught

me a little off guard. She asked, " Why do you use the phrase 'I give myself

permission...' so much when we are tapping? " The reason this question caught

me off guard is I didn't realize how much I did use the phase.

The fact is that often we don't feel that we deserve the things we actually

do deserve. When there is a part of our self or our past that needs to be

healed, there often is going to be a part of ourselves that is strangely and

unreasonably resistant to that healing. I have found with my clients that one

of the most common types of resistance to healing is a feeling of not being

worthy or not deserving healing and change. The feeling of undeserving and

unworthiness generally takes two forms.

The first type of resistance to healing is the feeling of not being worthy

or not deserving to heal pain or am issue that already exists.

In this instance our self-talk can sound like: " You deserve the pain you have

…You are being punished…You shouldn't ask for better…This is as good as

it

is going to get…Others have it far worse than you do…How dare you ask for

healing… "

The second type of resistance to healing is a feeling of not being worthy or

deserving of better things in the future.

In this instance our self-talk can sound like: " Who are you to think you

should have a better job…better life…more pay…doing work you

love…losing weight

…finding the partner of your dreams? You already have too much. You

shouldn't ask for more. There are people with way less than you. You are

being

greedy. Only good people deserve more and you are not good. "

These are very powerful thoughts and beliefs that can imprison us for years.

When we have these feeling it is often even hard to get the strength to try

to tackle these issues to move down the road of healing. This is the reason

the phrase " I give myself permission to… " is so powerful. It is speaking

directly to the part of us that sp often –– even when we don’t realize it

––

doesn't feel it is allowed to change because it is not worthy enough to

change.

As we know, EFT is a very powerful tool for helping us deal with the

resistance we have toward getting the healing we deserve. But for some reason

when

I was working with clients we would often make a great deal of progress and

then hit a wall. We couldn't get the last little bit. That is when I started

adding this idea of directly giving permission to change right in the EFT

statement. The moment we are given permission to move on that last bit of

resistance melts away.

I often tell my clients " I give you permission to change your life for the

better and you are allowed to give yourself permission as well. " Just by

having someone else tell us it is okay, we suddenly feel like it really is

okay.

I have even gone as far as to write some clients notes (just like we used to

get from mom and dad asking the teacher to excuse us from school) to give

them permission to change your life.

Giving permission is actually a very easy thing to incorporate into your

tapping routine. " Permission phrases " are no different than any other phrase

that we use when doing EFT. You say them while tapping, but remember. the key

point is to be very specific about what the permission is you are giving.

The phrase, " I give myself permission to be happy " might be effective but it

will be even more effective to approach it by being more specific as in:

I give myself permission to be happy with my life

I give myself permission to be happy with who I am.

I give myself permission to be happy with the choices I make.

You deserve more and better, but you need to spell that out specifically

too.

You can use " permission phrases " for anything that you are doing.

I give myself permission to know I deserve to be happy (or healthy, wealthy,

lovable)

I give myself permission to forgive myself (or someone else) for the choices

I have made in the past [again, if there is a specific choice name it, such

as “getting into debtâ€]

I give myself permission to loose weight, even though there is a part of me

that’s resistant.

I give myself permission to stop worrying about what others think of the

work I do.

The formula is simple. Just give yourself permission to get past what ever

limiting belief you have.