Guest guest Posted March 11, 2004 Report Share Posted March 11, 2004 Last weekend I had to do something I really didn't want to- face my abusive father after 20 years. He kicked me out of his house when I was 15, and I never looked back. My sister called me up because my mothers birthday just passed and she has been missing for 22 years, my sister has a very active imagination and came up with a theory that my father murdered my mother. She will not let go of this, so I told her I would help her, by confronting my father for information. Needless to say right before we were to go suddenly a pressing appointment at chucky cheese came up and she left me to do this alone. Waves of memories hit me, I was scared to face the frightful giant man I remember as 6'2 and 200+lbs, I reluctantly rang the door bell to this broken down house, thinking he can't possibly live HERE, but he answered the door- awkward moment for both, then I stepped inside to a unbelievable mess, dirt, a breathing machine- suddenly I wasn't scared anymore. Gone is his business, he is losing his house he has cancer and he is alone, regret is all I saw in his eyes for what could have been. I sat with him for a couple hours and I made him happy, but I wonder if he saw the pity I felt, he offers no appologies for the past and I expect none, but I know he thinks about it. He was once a skilled tradesman,had a sucessful business and a name, but he chose to live his life with hatred, anger and bitterness now he wonders why he has 3 daughters, a son , 3 son-in-laws and not one of them want anything to do with him or his business , sadly it will be buried with him. Those of us who are lucky enough to make a living out of something we love to do, to learn a craft or a skill-do we do this just to make a buck? My mother in law who died too young, a skilled nurse among many other things-her name and knowledge lives through our stories of her, and a scholarship that has been established in her name- my daughter will be applying for that scholarship and I bet that dear woman is looking down on us and proud of the way she lived her life, knowledge is worthless if it isn't shared. Gea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2004 Report Share Posted March 12, 2004 I just had to add my 2 cents, You are an amazing woman, what you did took enormous courage, and i have to say, that I am so very proud of you! Carol - gea_welsh Thursday, March 11, 2004 9:57 AM OT- seeing clearly Last weekend I had to do something I really didn't want to- face my abusive father after 20 years. He kicked me out of his house when I was 15, and I never looked back. My sister called me up because my mothers birthday just passed and she has been missing for 22 years, my sister has a very active imagination and came up with a theory that my father murdered my mother. She will not let go of this, so I told her I would help her, by confronting my father for information. Needless to say right before we were to go suddenly a pressing appointment at chucky cheese came up and she left me to do this alone. Waves of memories hit me, I was scared to face the frightful giant man I remember as 6'2 and 200+lbs, I reluctantly rang the door bell to this broken down house, thinking he can't possibly live HERE, but he answered the door- awkward moment for both, then I stepped inside to a unbelievable mess, dirt, a breathing machine- suddenly I wasn't scared anymore. Gone is his business, he is losing his house he has cancer and he is alone, regret is all I saw in his eyes for what could have been. I sat with him for a couple hours and I made him happy, but I wonder if he saw the pity I felt, he offers no appologies for the past and I expect none, but I know he thinks about it. He was once a skilled tradesman,had a sucessful business and a name, but he chose to live his life with hatred, anger and bitterness now he wonders why he has 3 daughters, a son , 3 son-in-laws and not one of them want anything to do with him or his business , sadly it will be buried with him. Those of us who are lucky enough to make a living out of something we love to do, to learn a craft or a skill-do we do this just to make a buck? My mother in law who died too young, a skilled nurse among many other things-her name and knowledge lives through our stories of her, and a scholarship that has been established in her name- my daughter will be applying for that scholarship and I bet that dear woman is looking down on us and proud of the way she lived her life, knowledge is worthless if it isn't shared. Gea Step By Step Instructions On Making Rose Petal Preserves: http://www.av-at.com/stuff/rosejam.html To adjust your group settings (i.e. go no mail) see the following link: /join Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2004 Report Share Posted March 12, 2004 Gea~ I am very proud of you, this has been a challenging year for you and you have risen to meet those challenges with grace and a level head. Proud to know you! Hugs~ Janet >Last weekend I had to do something I really didn't want to- face my >abusive father after 20 years. He kicked me out of his house when I >was 15, and I never looked back. My sister called me up because my >mothers birthday just passed and she has been missing for 22 years, >my sister has a very active imagination and came up with a theory >that my father murdered my mother. She will not let go of this, so I >told her I would help her, by confronting my father for information. >Needless to say right before we were to go suddenly a pressing >appointment at chucky cheese came up and she left me to do this >alone. Waves of memories hit me, I was scared to face the frightful >giant man I remember as 6'2 and 200+lbs, I reluctantly rang the door >bell to this broken down house, thinking he can't possibly live HERE, >but he answered the door- awkward moment for both, then I stepped >inside to a unbelievable mess, dirt, a breathing machine- suddenly I >wasn't scared anymore. Gone is his business, he is losing his house >he has cancer and he is alone, regret is all I saw in his eyes for >what could have been. >I sat with him for a couple hours and I made him happy, but I wonder >if he saw the pity I felt, he offers no appologies for the past and I >expect none, but I know he thinks about it. >He was once a skilled tradesman,had a sucessful business and a name, >but he chose to live his life with hatred, anger and bitterness now >he wonders why he has 3 daughters, a son , 3 son-in-laws and not one >of them want anything to do with him or his business , sadly it will >be buried with him. >Those of us who are lucky enough to make a living out of something we >love to do, to learn a craft or a skill-do we do this just to make a >buck? >My mother in law who died too young, a skilled nurse among many >other things-her name and knowledge lives through our stories of her, >and a scholarship that has been established in her name- my daughter >will be applying for that scholarship and I bet that dear woman is >looking down on us and proud of the way she lived her life, knowledge >is worthless if it isn't shared. >Gea Making Light of Scents, Janet Golden-Hogan http://www.GoldenEssence.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2004 Report Share Posted March 12, 2004 Gea, How proud you should be of yourself. That sentence " I sat with him for a couple of hours and I made him happy " says so much about you. You probably gave him more in those two hours than he has had in years. You put away all the grievances and hurt you endured at his hands and just sat with him. How precious that time was to him I'm sure. He probably does now, in the quiet hours of being sick and alone, think how things were and how they could have been. I'm proud of you that you have become this kind of woman not because of him but in spite of him. You're good people!!!! MAKE A HAPPY MEMORY EVERY DAY: Evelyn Alternasense Skin Design Products www.alternasense.com<http://www.alternasense.com/> ----- I sat with him for a couple hours and I made him happy, but I wonder if he saw the pity I felt, he offers no appologies for the past and I expect none, but I know he thinks about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 12, 2004 Report Share Posted March 12, 2004 You guys are so sweet, thank-you. I must say I am not really that nice, secretly I hope my sister gains 20 pounds from eating chucky cheese pizza:) Gea Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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