OT: Gud Ol' Bubba

[Guest guest]

I knew a feller one time lived down West Tennessee way named Bubba and

Bubba knew EVERYONE in the whole danged world - and they all knew him!!!

 

One time when Bubba got his'sef a new job, Bubba says to his new boss,

" Boss, I know everyone in the whole danged world! " But his boss don't

believe him, so he says, " No way do you know everyone in the whole dang

world, " but Bubba says, " Yes suh I sho'nuf do! " So Bubba's boss up and

says, " Well prove it! " So Bubba says " Pick sumbody...and I know'em! "

 

Well Bubba's boss thinks for a minute and then he says, " Tom Selleck! I

bet you don't know Tom Selleck! " Bubba says, " Tom Selleck! Ol' Tom and

me were in the Boy Scouts together when we wuz young'uns! " Bubba's boss

says " No you weren't! " Then Bubba says " Yes we were! " So they fly out

to Hollywood and drive up to Tom Selleck's house. Bubba knocks on the

door and Tom Selleck opens the door and Bubba goes " Tom, " and Tom goes

" Bubba, " and they hug and catch up on old times for about 30 minutes and

Bubba's boss just can't believe what he's seeing.

 

But then he says, " Well that could happen, it's just one person, " and

Bubba says, " OK, pick sumbody else! " This time Bubba's boss says, " The

President of the US of A, George Bush! You don't know President Bill

Clinton! " But Bubba says, " Oh yes I do! George and me went to school

together in Texas! " Bubba's boss says, " No you didn't! " and Bubba

says " Yes we danged sure did! " So they fly to Washington and they catch

George Bush at a press conference. They work their way up through the

crowd until Bubba gets close enough to catch Bush's eye and waves and

says " Georgie, " and the President waves and says " Bubba, " and after that

press conference they hug and catch up on old times for about 30 minutes

and Bubba's boss is stunned-- he can't believe it.

 

But then he thinks " Well that's just two people in one country - that

doesn't mean he knows everyone in the whole world! " so he tells Bubba

and Bubba says, " OK, pick anybody in the danged world and I know'em! "

 

Bubba's boss knows just who to pick so he says, " The Pope! You do not

know the Pope! " And Bubba says, " The Pope! The Pope Baptised me, " and

Bubba's boss says " No he didn't, " and Bubba says " Yes he dang sure did! "

So they fly off to Rome where the Pope is getting ready to hold Mass in

front of hundreds of thousands of people. They work their way through

the crowd, without much luck. So Bubba says, " Boss, we ain't never gonna

get there together through all these folks so I tell you what - I'll

ease my way on up yonder where he is and when I get there, I'll give you

a sign that shows you I know the Pope, " and he leaves.

 

Well Bubba's boss waits and waits and waits and just when he's about

ready to give up, he sees the Pope come out onto the balcony and right

there beside him is Bubba! Shortly afterwards, Bubba's boss passes out.

Bubba comes back and finds his boss passed out on the ground and he fans

him and says, " Boss! Boss! Wakeup! " And when his boss comes to, Bubba

asks, " Boss, what happened? "

 

Bubba's boss looks at Bubba and says, " OK, I can see Tom Selleck. I can

see George Bush ... I can even take the Pope! But when that feller

standing next to me asked, 'Who's that up there with Bubba?' that was a

little more than I could take! "