OT: The Military Mind

[Guest guest]

Time for some smiles. Sometimes its the ONLY effective medicine.

 

Military/ex-military folks will quickly understand these and others will

probably just enjoy! ;-p Butch

 

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During field training exercises, a young Lieutenant was driving down a

muddy back road when he encountered another jeep stuck in the mud with a

red-faced Colonel at the wheel.

 

" Your jeep stuck, sir? " asked the Lieutenant as he pulled alongside.

 

" No its not son, " replied the Colonel, coming over and handing him the

keys, " yours is. "

 

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Having just moved into his new office, a pompous, newly promoted Colonel

was sitting at his desk when a young soldier knocked on the door.

 

Conscious of his new position, the Colonel quickly picked up the phone,

told the soldier to enter, then said into the phone, " Yes, General, I'll

be seeing him this afternoon and I'll pass along your message. In the

meantime, thank you for your good wishes, sir. "

 

Feeling as though he had sufficiently impressed the young enlisted man,

he asked, " What do you want? "

 

" Nothing important, sir, " the soldier replied, " I'm just here to hook up

your telephone. "

 

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Lieutenant: " Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? "

 

Soldier: " Sure do. "

 

Lieutenant: " That's no way to address an officer! Let's try it again! "

 

Lieutenant: " Soldier, do you have change for a dollar? "

 

Soldier: " No, SIR! "

 

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Q: How do you know if there is a fighter pilot at your party?

A: He'll tell you.

 

Q: What's the difference between God and fighter pilots?

A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot.

 

Q: What's the difference between a fighter pilot and a jet engine?

A: A jet engine stops making noise when the plane shuts down.

 

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" Well, " snarled the tough old Navy Chief to the bewildered Seaman. " I

suppose after you get discharged from the Navy, you'll just be waiting

for me to die so you can come and urinate on my grave. "

 

" Not me, Chief! " the Seaman replied. " Once I get out of the Navy, I'm

never going to stand in line again! "