Guest guest Posted May 23, 2003 Report Share Posted May 23, 2003 Hi Chris, other good folks .. Sorry to hear of your friend's death ... and of those others related. But unfortunately, its a part of the circle of life. And we become more concerned when those who pass along are young .. we feel that they have not had a chance to see all sides of the elephant. But unless one is ill, there's never a good time to go and sometimes when we're older and ready to settle down its even less timely. A friend in DC .. retired general officer, just sent me newspaper clip where his 2d cousin and his wife were murdered in East Texas .. in a nice quiet family neighborhood. The murderer was caught but that does not bring them back. This week ... one of the ladies on a list advised me that a very good friend of mine (she had worked with him before) had died of a heart attack in February. I've been bothered by this a lot .. more than I was when my mother passed along in November .. and that bothered me a lot. But she was ill and she was ready. Tom Ramey was not ready. Tom was 65 in February .. had started to draw social security in February. Tom was married to B.J. for 48 + years. B.J. had been semi-invalid for the last 25 years or so .. Tom cooked and cleaned and nursed her .. and worked as contracts manager for a number of companies. I met him when we worked together here in Turkey. Tom had a heart attack in the 1970s .. he survived it and seemed to be doing well. In 1995, he and I and a couple of other folks climbed the goat path to Nemrut Mountain in Eastern Turkey .. monstrous statues up there .. some weighing over 40 tons and they've not yet decided how the ancients put them there. We began at 2:30 in the morning and after a mind-boggeling climb of an 8% grade on sliding rocks reached the summit around 4 and was able to watch the sun rise BELOW US. Kurdish kids were always there dancing around a bonfire .. and even in August you needed a heavy coat as it was high and cold. That climb tested everyone and Tom made it without any problems. I pushed Tom to retire when he was 62 but he wanted to continue to work and save as much as he could because he believed that someday he might go before B.J. and he wanted her to have all the care she needed; which was a lot. When he hit 65 he passed over to the other side .. and he's now buried in Quantico, Virginia. So I guess there's no good time to go unless we are very ill. The older I get the more old friends I lose .. we'll all see it happen in time .. unless our old friends see us go first. There was a time when I thought a lot of accumulating things .. and I accumulated a lot of things in my life. And I gave them all away. I have less now in the way of material goods than I have ever had .. and it doesn't bother me a bit. I look back and think how stupid I was when I used to spend time collecting antique furniture and weapons and land and trying to furnish the finest house I could have .. more than anyone needed it was. I had it all .. and I gave it all away .. and I like how I live now. The Lakota/Dakota believed that the measure of a person was not what they accumulated but what they could give away. I understand their thinking. So .. if you're not a youngster and you have more than you need today .. think about that. If you're middle aged and plan on leaving this and that to your children .. why not give it to them now so you can enjoy them enjoying it? Better this is .. methinks .. than the dispersal of your property after some slickass lawyer reads your will. Again .. Chris .. and other good folks who have lost relatives and/or loved ones .. my condolences. And though it sometimes seems unfair, its really just a part of the cycle of life .. and someday we'll be the one who goes over to the other side. What we do between now and then will be what folks remember. And what we remember is all we have left of those we love. Y'all keep smiling. :-) Butch Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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