OT: Wisdom from Chris Rock and Trying To Help by Dennis Miller

[Guest guest]

Now for my one off topic current events type post ... two top comedians

talk about current events ...

 

Have a great weekend folks ...

 

*Smile*

Chris (list mom)

 

http://www.alittleolfactory.com

 

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Wisdom from Chris Rock

 

" You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white

 

guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is

Chinese, the

 

Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance,

 

Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in

America

 

are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon' " - Chris Rock

 

 

 

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" TRYING TO HELP "

By Dennis Miller

 

All the rhetoric on whether or not we should go to war against Iraq has

got my little brain spinning like a top. I enjoy reading opinions from

both sides, but I've detected a hint of confusion from some of you.

Maybe this can help.

As I was reading the paper recently, I was reminded of the best advice

anyone ever gave me. He told me about the " KISS " method ( " Keep It

Simple, Stupid! " ). So with this as a theme, I'd like to apply this

theory for those who don't quite get it. My hope is that we can

simplify things and recognize a few important facts.

Here are ten things to consider when voicing an opinion on this

important issue:

 

(1) Between President Bush and Saddam Hussein ... Hussein is the bad

guy.

 

(2) If you have faith in the United Nations to do the right things, keep

this in mind: the UN has Libya heading the Committee on Human Rights

and Iraq heading the Global Disarmament Committee. Do your own math

here.

 

(3) If you use a Google or search and type in " French Military

Victories, " don't be surprised if your computer panics at its inability

to respond to your inquiry.

 

(4) If your only anti-war slogan is " No War For Oil, " hire a pit bull

lawyer and sue your school district for having allowed you to slip

through the cracks and robbing you of the minimum education that any

non-troglodyte deserves

 

(5) You can take this one to the bank: Saddam and bin Laden will NOT

seek UN approval before they try to kill us.

 

(6) Despite common belief among some, Martin Sheen is NOT the President.

He only plays one on TV.

 

(7) If you are anti-war and even an outright " America Basher, " to bin

Laden you are still an " infidel " whom he wants dead.

 

(8) Be careful: if you believe in a " vast right-wing conspiracy, " but

not in the danger that Hussein poses, the only job you may be able to

get is as an Ivy League college professor.

 

(9) Even multi-culturalists who try to browbeat us into believing that

all cultures are equally deserving of respect have trouble explaining

the past 500 years of Islam.

 

(10) Whether you are for or against military action, our young men and

women overseas are fighting to defend our right to speak out on these

issues. They deserve our unreserved support.

 

I hope this helps.