CHICKEN JOKE FOR THE WEEK

[Guest guest]

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

According to:

JERRY FALWELLBecause the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see theplain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "otherside." That's what "they" call it the "other side. "Yes, my friends, thatchicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I saywe boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberalmedia whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the otherside." Thatchicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple asthat.PAT BUCHANANTo steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.DR. SEUSSDid the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! Thechicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!ERNEST HEMINGWAYTo die. In the rain.MARTIN LUTHER KING, JRI envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads withouthaving their motives called into question.GRANDPAIn my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told usthat the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.ARISTOTLEIt is the nature of chickens to cross the road.KARL MARXIt was a historical inevitability.SADDAM HUSSAINThis was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified indropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.RONALD REAGANWhat chicken?KEN STARRI intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of thepresident of the United States of America in an effort to distract lawenforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoingour highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, thechicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate schemeto obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staffintends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he cooperatesfully with our investigation. Furthermore,the chicken will not be permittedto reach the other side of the road until our investigation and anyCongressional follow-up investigations have been completed. (We also areinvestigating whether Sid Blumenthal has leaked information to the Rev.Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be homosexual in an effort todiscredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least toruffle his feathers.)CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRKTo boldly go where no chicken has gone before.FOX MULDERYou saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have tocross before you believe it?FREUDThe fact that you are at all concerned the chicken crossed the road revealsyour underlying sexual insecurity.BILL GATESI have just released eChicken 99, which will not only cross roads, but willlay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-andInternet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.EINSTEINDid the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath thechicken?BILL CLINTONI did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken?Could you define chicken please?LOUIS FARRAKHANThe road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the"black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.THE BIBLEAnd God came down from the heavens, and said unto the chicken, "Thou shaltcross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was muchrejoicing.COLONEL SANDERSI missed one?