Anxiety/Self esteem

[Guest guest]

The level of insecurity really depends on the person and their circumstance as

well as the length and depth of the insecurity.  How to overcome it is a

difficult question.  For me I had to break a pattern that was taught as a child

and realize that I am worthy of love, attention etc.  When I had a negative

thought I would try to remember a happier time in my life and focus on that

instead of beating myself up verbally and rehashing old icky stuff in my mind. 

Which of course is not easy to do, but with practice as with all things it

becomes second nature.   Also being around negative people was only adding to my

problem and making me feel really down.  I don't know if this is

your sitituation?   It was during those times I would have some major panic

attacks and would excuse myself to the nearest exit, because some people are

just mean.  And I always went, if they feel that way about so and so how do they

feel about me.  When that

happened I would try to calm myself down and say I believe in me.  That person

does not define me or even know who I am.  Their nasty behavior and rude

comments is not about me, but their own problems and insecurities.   But if

there was any little hint of truth to what they said, I instantly would rehash

over and over in my mind, which made matters worse.  Even if it was about me, 

it was their opinion, and they are entitled to it.  Yet I would take their words

and rehash them in my mind and see if I can improve my behavior to be a better

person.  When you go in with that state of mind, it doesn't matter what others

think about you, it matters what you think of you.  One has to make a choice to

be miserable or happy regardless of their situation, and you can't please

everyone no matter what you do, there will always be someone in the crowd that

misunderstands or gets angry.    Does this thinking work all of the time? 

No...  Everyone

has their days.  Just you can't let others define you, or what your potential

is only you know your limits. There will always be someone who gets upset,

because your not living your life to their standards or offended because not

everyone is at the same state of mind at the same time if ever.  Don't let it

bring you down, do what you believe is right for your well being, you're in

charge of how you react to your situation.

 

If possible try to reward yourself with positive feedback when you know you did

something well.  Buy yourself or make something that brings a smile or just

makes you laugh.  I have this stupid looking elephant with pink dots on it and

a tiny pink ninja plastic doll and yeah they fight it out.  Sometimes the

elephant is my issue and I'm the ninja kicking it's butt or the other way

around.   I know it sounds childish, but it works for me (big kid) not always,

but hopefully you get the point and understand the size difference between the

two items.  Eithier way it makes me laugh, because it is so silly, and I look at

the situation from a different perspective and realize what the problem really

is.  )  If we allow ourselves to make a mistake and learn from it, we grow and

evolve as a person.  But if we beat ourself up because we aren't like someone

else we stay stagnet and never change for the better.   Hope that makes sense. 

 

Also change your scenary from time to time. Take a class on something

that is interesting or challenging.   If you have kids, try something new, maybe

taking a different route on your drive home or office.  Whatever works for

you that gives one a sense of accomplishment.   Now this is just stuff that I

do, if it works for others fantastic, if not find what does for you.  Just know

that your not alone, many people have anxiety, we just don't have to let it run

or take over our life.  

 

Blue Moon

 

 

--- On Sun, 6/7/09, Pragati Chopra <chopra.pragati wrote:

 

 

Pragati Chopra <chopra.pragati

Re: Anxiety

 

Sunday, June 7, 2009, 1:47 AM

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks blue moon, I will certainly try out the suggestions provided by you.

 

I didnt know that the kind of food we eat can also increase or decrease anxiety.

I will keep a check on this and try to find out what hold true for my situation.

What i have realized abt myself is one thing that insecurity of any kind leads

to anxiety. Would u have any suggestions for that.

 

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