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MediaCulture

 

Rev. Moon's Conjugal Visitations

 

By John Gorenfeld, AlterNet. Posted April 17, 2006.

 

We all know the religious Right wants to tell us what we can't do in

the bedroom, but no one asks what they want us to do instead.

 

Among the trendier gripes about why liberals lack power in American

politics is that there isn't enough tolerance for America's faithful.

A big problem, Rabbi Michael Lerner recently sighed, is that " the

Left's hostility to religion and spirituality has become such a major

stumbling block to the chances that progressive forces will ever win

enough power " to make a difference. So the new advice, from Hillary

Clinton to the New Republic's Gregg Easterbrook, is: Stop making

snickering remarks at Jerry Falwell's expense. Cheer the innovation of

$2 billion in federal tax money carted off to religious groups last

year. Drag the " Left Behind " series into your Amazon shopping cart.

 

And listen, I should add, to the Reverend Sun Myung Moon, owner of the

conservative mouthpiece the Washington Times and self-proclaimed

Messiah, Moon's warning to America is that we must have sex the way he

entreats us, in the positions he has designated, or else forfeit our

" love organs, " as he dubs them, to the dark lord Satan.

 

We all know the Right wants to decide what we can't do in the bedroom.

But no one ever seems to ask what the Right wants us to do instead.

 

" After the act of love, " read the instructions from the Rev. Moon's

conservative Family Federation, " both spouses should wipe their sexual

areas with the Holy Handkerchief. Hang the handkerchief to dry

naturally and keep them eternally. They must be kept individually

labeled and should never be laundered and mixed up. "

Maybe the best explanation of our widespread ignorance of the

Washington Times owner's sex rites is liberal squeamishness. For those

of you who suckled on secular humanism and feminist tracts (which Moon

calls Satanic, by the way), these prescriptions from God might seem as

off-putting as a Castro Street postcard storefront to Dr. James Dobson.

But in order to usher in a national dialogue on faith in the public

square, it's important to look beyond stereotypes of the Right to

understand the diverse philosophies behind public movements for

state-enforced morality.

Rev. Moon, whose Washington Times is a crown jewel of the conservative

media Death Star, offers the essential lessons. He's the last man most

Americans would associate with Republican power circles, but is in his

own secretive way as important a figure in the Christian Right as

Jerry Falwell, who's still in business thanks to a $3.5 million

bailout from Moon in 1995, or Tim LaHaye of the Council For National

Policy, who took money to serve on the board of a group rehabilitating

Moon's image, and once wrote a letter addressing Moon as " the Master. "

Just how big is Moon's standing in the Right? The " Republican Noise

Machine " is a mighty edifice built with $3 billion in gifts from

various right-wing philanthropists. Moon's gift of the Washington

Times to the conservative cause alone places him in the club as a

charter member; the paper owes its existence to a staggering figure of

over $2,000,000,000 since 1982 in donations in Moon's mystery money.

Moon also also controls United Press International, one of the world's

largest wire news services. In addition to having a hand in the

creation of modern-day Christian Right politics, Moon has given huge

sums to Richard Viguerie, the " founding funder " of the Reagan

revolution; Terry Dolan, the pioneer of the " liberal bias " attack; and

George W. Bush, who received $250,000 from Moon in 2004.

By 1989, U.S. News & World Report was reporting Moon had built " a

network of affiliated organizations and connections in almost every

conservative organization in Washington, including the Heritage

Foundation, " but that " conservatives ... fear repercussions if they

expose the church's role. " In 2004, a veteran Christian Right

lobbyist, Gary Jarmin, arranged to have Moon coronated the " King of

Peace " in a kitschy ceremony on Capitol Hill in which he wore a

glittering crown and royal robes.

Moon, the first President Bush said, while touring South America with

the True Father in 1996, is " the man with the vision " whose newspaper

" restores sanity to Washington. " So why must the gatekeepers of the

mainstream media bar his ideas from the public debate on morality? Why

does his own employee, Times editorial page editor Tony Blankley,

whose paper Moon says he mainly established to " tell the world about

God, " hold back from telling the McLaughlin Group about the greatness

of Rev. Moon's plans for society.

In the interest of healthy public discourse, it bears upon us instead

to consider the philosophy fueling Moon, who has long acted on his

professed longing to see gays and " free sex " banished from America.

Moon's Federation offers an instruction manual explaining, among other

things, on which occasions the man should be on top, how Satan can be

banished with the spank of a wooden paddle and franker lessons still.

Recipe for love

There is, as Moon sees it, a profound sex crisis in America. " Satan, "

the Times publisher said in 2004, " is clinging to our sexual organs. "

Women are a " line of prostitutes, " who should be punished for

selfishness. " The concave organ [vagina] should be sealed with concrete. "

" The women are the problem in history, " he said in 2004. " Women who

don't want to have children should cut away their breasts, bottoms and

love organ because the purpose for those was first for the children.

If they don't fulfill that purpose, then they are not needed. "

" Woman's sexual organ is like the open mouth of a snake filled with

poison, " he said in 1996. Men don't get off any easier. Keep pliers in

your pocket, he says, " and when you go to the bathroom, once a day,

pinch your love organ. Cut the skin a little bit as a warning. "

Moon has even a darker vision for gay men. Moon told an audience he'd

like to see them removed in a " purge on God's orders.... Gays will be

eliminated, the three Israels will unite. If not, then they will be

burned. We do not know what kind of world God will bring, but this is

what happens. It will be greater than the Communist purge but at God's

orders. " (No wonder the Times style guide puts " gay " in quotes.)

Far from being confined to his church, his philosophy has fueled years

of voter mobilization drives, state and local candidacies and public

campaigns opposing sexual liberties for nonmembers -- such as birth

control, sex education, gay rights. There have been Moon-sponsored

rallies for " pure sex " in the streets of Chicago, featuring mascots

dressed up as gonorrhea bacteria. So don't mistake his sexual beliefs

for a party to which you aren't invited. " By 2004, we have to reach

the level of Jesus occupying Rome, " he said in 2001, speaking of his

American ambitions. " Invite me as master and owner, or it all will

fade away and be broken. The Capitol Hill, the U.N. -- I should be the

king. "

The goal of getting involved in politics and social services, say his

clerics, is to cleanse Satan from humanity's bloodline. Meanwhile,

under George W. Bush's Healthy Marriage Initiative and abstinence-only

grants, his pastors have won nearly $1 million in public funding.

Moon's abstinence-only education group Free Teens USA, funded by the

Department of Health and Human Services, instructs school kids in New

Jersey: " It's not just your body, it's your whole lineage forever. " In

a lesson plan featured online, a " family tree " exercise appears to be

inspired by Moon's teachings. And to teach that loving carelessly is

vile, youths are asked to drink from a cup of spit, according to a

lesson plan featured online.

Conjugal visitation

So let's say you've married a spouse chosen for you by the creator of

the Washington Times at one of his 2,000-couple stadium weddings.

You've gone through a Moon-ordained period of sexlessness, but now the

time has come to get down to business for the first time with your new

husband or wife.

Not so fast. At some date prior to the lovemaking, Moon's " indemnity

stick ceremony " is used to paddle Satan's spirit from your

lover-to-be. The evil spirit is present, according to one church

testimony, because " men and women misused each other's sexual parts,

for selfish purposes, [and] it gave birth to this resentment ... So we

receive three hits of the stick. "

According to the Family Federation website, Satan will not be purged

until newlyweds carry out his " Three Day Ceremony " in specified sex

positions, in Holy Gowns, in front of his photograph. You're to meet

at a location that's " as holy a place as possible " -- one of Moon's

churches is OK. You should have a number of items on hand, according

to the instructions available online, including a Holy Handkerchief, a

church-supplied cloth, and a photo of the Washington Times publisher

and conservative benefactor with his wife, Hak Ja Moon. By now you

have embraced them as your True Parents, maybe even replacing your

biological mom and dad. Next the room must be sanctified to ward off

any potential Satanic comeback, with prayers, a candle and the

sprinkling of holy salt.

Over three nights, there must be three acts of sex. The first night,

the woman is on top. The second night proceeds much the same as the

first. But this time there is emphasis on the idea the man-on-bottom

has progressed to " Growth Stage Adam. "

Night three: time for the " man to restore dominion. " Missionary position.

Moon appears to recognize that not all men will be able to sustain an

erection during this procedure.

" The act of love should be a complete act (penetration and

ejaculation), " the anonymous authors make clear. " In the event that it

is difficult to achieve this, strive to achieve as much penetration as

possible and continue with the remainder of the ceremony.

" For the act of love, it is all right to caress each other. Insertion

must be accomplished. The couple should continue the act of love until

ejaculation, but if it is difficult to reach ejaculation, the act may

be stopped at that point. However, insertion itself must be

accomplished. If insertion is not possible because the husband does

not have an erection, the wife must take her husband's sexual organ in

her hand and guide it into her sexual part in order to successfully do

the ceremony. If the act of love is not fulfilled and it is delayed,

it must be fulfilled within 24 hours starting from the beginning of

the ceremony. It is not permitted to use a condom or any other

apparatus during the act of love. "

In an America where the separation of church and state have widely

come to be seen as an urban legend, these ideas deserve as much

consideration as the Silver Ring Thing, until recently the inspiration

for a $1 million grant in Pittsburgh to push someone else's religious

crusade: " to saturate the United States, " as the mission statement

said, " with a generation of young people who have taken a vow of

sexual abstinence until marriage and put on the silver ring. This

mission can only be achieved by offering a personal relationship with

Jesus Christ ... "

And this is the risk of inviting God into the public square. One man's

Silver Ring Thing is another man's Holy Handkerchief.