THE STEEP PRICE OF DEFEATING TERROR

[Guest guest]

" THE STEEP PRICE OF DEFEATING TERROR "

by

Melvin Durai

 

President Bush has asked Congress for $72.4 billion to fund

the " Global War on Terror " through fiscal year 2006. About

$65 billion will go toward the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan,

bringing total spending for the two wars to nearly $400

billion. That's a lot of money, folks, almost $1,000 for

every man, woman, child, dog, cat and goldfish in America.

 

I can't fathom spending $400 billion on two wars. I mean,

wouldn't it be cheaper to just send Dick Cheney over there?

The vice president is surely embarrassed about shooting his

friend while quail hunting and eager for a chance to redeem

himself. Drop him in the war zone, I say. You might be

surprised what a man with motivation can do.

 

General: " Mr. Vice President, how did you do today? "

 

Cheney: " Pretty good. I'm all out of ammunition. "

 

General: " Great! What did you shoot? "

 

Cheney: " Forty-five targets, including 23 barns, 15 sheds

and seven trees. "

 

General: " Good. I'll add them to the enemy casualty list.

But what about the insurgents? Did you get any of them? "

 

Cheney: " No, as soon as they saw me, the insurgents turned

into outsurgents. They started running in all directions,

yelling something like, 'It's the crazy guy who shot his

friend. Imagine what he'll do to us.' I tried firing at

them, but those darn barns kept getting in the way. The

sheds and trees, too. "

 

General: " Well, you'll do better tomorrow, I'm sure. "

 

Cheney: " I hope so. If I keep hitting worthless objects,

how's my firm going to get another rebuilding contract? "

 

Okay, maybe it wouldn't be such a good idea to send Cheney

to Iraq. He can be far more useful in America, especially if

he helps explain where all the money is going. According to

a White House press release, " The President is committed to

giving our troops and commanders in the field the resources

they need to fight and win the War on Terror. " I don't know

about you, but I'm looking forward to the day when President

Bush can declare victory over terror. I'm going to be so

elated when I see the New York Times headline that says,

" Terror surrenders, war over. " But I can't help thinking

that America can terrorize terror into submission without

spending so much money. Here are just a few suggestions:

 

---Put democracy to work. Bush needs to get on the phone

with King Abdullah of Saudi Arabia and others: " We're

bringing democracy to Iraq and if you don't start helping us

with the costs, we'll bring it to you too. " I mean, what

good is democracy if you can't threaten people with it?

 

---Create a real coalition. America sent 130,000 soldiers to

Iraq, while Kazakhstan sent a dozen nightclub bouncers.

Bush allowed Mexico to get away with sending not a single

soldier, though he could have easily rounded up a platoon on

a street corner in L.A.

 

---Check the math. When you spend $400 billion, you can

afford to hire a few auditors to make sure no one is getting

rich off the war, except those approved by the president.

 

I wish some of the soldiers were getting rich, because many

of them come from poor families. Rich kids don't go to

war -- they go to Congress. And they never know what it's

like to be in a war, never know what it's like to be shot

at, except of course when they go hunting with Cheney.

 

-------

http://www.MelvinDurai.com/warcost.htm

© Copyright 2006 Melvin Durai.