Guest guest Posted February 17, 2006 Report Share Posted February 17, 2006 S Monday, February 13, 2006 4:08 PM HOW TO SHOWER > HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN: Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. > Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. > Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do > more sit-ups/leg-lifts, etc. > Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. > Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added > vitamins. > Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. > Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. > Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. > Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. > Rinse conditioner off hair. > Shave armpits and legs. > Turn off shower. > Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. > Spray mold spots with Tilex. > Get out of shower. > Dry with towel the size of a small country. > Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. > Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. > > HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN: > Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in > a pile. > Walk naked to the > bathroom. > If you see wife along the way, shake wiener at her making the woo-woo sound. > Look at your manly physique in the mirror. > Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass. > Get in the shower. > Wash your face. > Wash your armpits. > Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. > Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. > Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. > Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. > Wash your hair. Make a Shampoo Mohawk. > Pee. > Rinse off and get out of shower. > Partially dry off. > Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. > Admire wiener size in mirror again. > Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. > Return to bedroom with towel a round waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the woo-woo sound again. > Throw wet towel on bed. > > If there is anyone among you who did not laugh at the truth behind this, there is something SO very wrong with you. Have a great day! Oh, > and....woo woo!!! > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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