NEXT ON 'OPRAH' ..... LEADERS WHO LIE

[Guest guest]

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From the Los Angeles Times

Next on 'Oprah' -- leaders who lie

ROSA BROOKS

 

 

February 3, 2006

 

SOMEDAY, IN AN alternate universe?.

 

Oprah: George W. Bush, I want to thank you for joining us today.

 

Five years ago you sat with me and spoke about your past struggles

with alcohol. But this week you did something even more courageous.

You stood right up before millions of Americans during your State of

the Union address and you openly confessed that you're " addicted to

oil. "

 

George: Well, Oprah, thank you. That was hard for me to say because,

you know, for a Texas man, it's just not easy to face up to something

like that.

 

Oprah: George, after you said that, I got the whole transcript of

your speech, and I stayed up two nights straight, honest-to-goodness.

I could not sleep, people! I was like, reading, reading. I couldn't

put it down.

 

I was just feeling for you, having to face getting rid of your SUVs

and Air Force One and the whole presidential motorcade!

 

George: Well, you know, the speech, it was full of complete

truthiness for me.

 

Oprah: And you spoke so movingly about facing up to your " switch

grass " issues too. There's an underlying message here about

redemption, isn't there? You are not surrendering to evil. That

really resonated with me.

 

George: I appreciate that. Fighting evil, it's hard work. I, um ? my

SUV, um ?

 

Oprah: George, you just go ahead, cry if you want to. I'm not ashamed

to tell you that when I watched your speech, I cried too.

 

George: I really appreciate that, Oprah.

 

Oprah: But George, I have to be straight with you now. I ? I have to

say it is difficult for me to talk to you because I also feel really

duped. I feel that you betrayed millions of Americans. I mean,

uniting, not dividing? " Clear plan for victory " in Iraq? Please! So

now, today, I don't know what is true and I don't know what isn't.

 

George: Oprah, I ? I ? look, I made some mistakes.

 

Oprah: George, why did you have to lie?

 

George: Oprah, the speech wasn't supposed to be read like it was, you

know, nonfiction. It's more like a memoir about the state of the

union.

 

Oprah: I feel that you conned us. You embarrassed me. You embarrassed

this nation.

 

George: I'm ? I'm a flawed person.

 

Oprah: How much of what was in the speech was fabricated?

 

George: Not that much. I mean, all the evils are real. Terrorism, uh,

sick people ? Democrats?. That hurricane was real?. And the human-

animal hybrids. They were in a movie.

 

Oprah: OK, I want to move on to the NSA surveillance story, because

that part of your story is so compelling, in terms of your struggle

with these Peeping Tom compulsions you have. Then you get to how

you're catching all these terrorists that way and it's all so, you

know, legal.

 

But that's a lie too, isn't it?

 

George: Oprah, I ? I ? wrote that part of the speech from memory?. I

had legal documents that supported it?. Well, I mean, the lawyers

said they doubted the Constitution meant I could do that, um, but

that there was a chance that it did, so I?.

 

Oprah: George, when will you come clean about WMD?

 

George: Well, there too I've talked to ? well, it's, like, a secret,

and it's ? since that time I've struggled with the idea of it?.

 

Oprah: No, the lie of it. It's not an idea, George. That's a lie.

 

George: [muffled sobbing]

 

Oprah: Do you now wish you had put a disclaimer in the speech,

George, something to warn the American people that your presidency

has pretty much been a million little lies, not to mention a few

really big whoppers?

 

George: (Weeping) Oprah, you ? you're right. I'm sorry. I've ? I've

betrayed the American people. But I can't, I don't want to lie

anymore!

 

Oprah: It's not too late. I believe the truth can set you free.

 

George: Oprah, uh, obviously, this hasn't been a great few years for

me or, I guess, uh, for those guys over there in, uh, Iraq. But I

think I come out of it better.

 

I mean, I feel like I came here and finally I have been honest with

you. I have, you know, essentially admitted to ? to lying.

 

Oprah: (To the studio audience) And so we move forward ? optimistic

about our country, faithful to its cause and confident of the

victories to come.

 

May God bless America.

 

(Applause).