CENTER FOR DISEASE CONTROL ISSUES CRISIS WARNING

[Guest guest]

CDC Atlanta, GA 2000 Zulu Time 9JAN06 - URGENT CRISIS WARNING!

 

It is anticipated that later this month during the annual 'State of the Union'

speech by President Bush that thousands of college students across the nation

will engage in drinking games where the participants are required to chug a beer

or down a shot everytime the President lies and/or mispronounces a word during

the televised speech. This has in the past resulted in a flood of patients to

the nation's emergency rooms to be treated for acute ethanol poisoning. All

emergency medical treatment facilities are warned in advance to have ample

supplies of gastric lavage equipment on hand to deal with the anticipated rush

of ethanol poisonings. Existing hospital facilities may be inadequate to treat

the anticipated volume of patients if past speeches by President Bush are any

indicator. Consideration should be given to the opening of convention centers

or other municipal facilities staffed with emergency medical personnel to meet

the anticipated need. Recomended course of treatment

should not only provide needed life support, but should also include

reassurance to the patient that it is only three more years until the next

president is inaugurated.

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COULD BE LESS...keep the faith!!

 

 

 

" When the power of love becomes stronger than the love of power, we will have

peace. "

Jimi Hendrix

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