Bush Vacation Jokes

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Fri, 19 Aug 2005 15:04:55 +1000 (EST)

Bush Vacation Jokes

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bush Vacation Jokes

From Daniel Kurtzman,Your Guide to Political Humor.

Late-Night Jokes About Bush's Record-Setting 2005

Vacation

" President Bush is going on his annual vacation. The

White House says he

goes to his Texas Ranch to unwind. I'm thinking, when

does he wind? " --David

Letterman

 

" As you know, President Bush is taking 5 weeks off.

It's like he's still in

the National Guard. " --Jay Leno

 

" It turns out President Bush can run again in the

next election. Now I know

you're only supposed to be allowed two terms, but the

Supreme Court said if

you count his vacation time, he's barely served one. "

--Jay Leno

 

" President Bush is on a five-week vacation. How many

folks get five weeks

off a year? You know, if I want five weeks off I have

to have open heart

surgery, for God's sake. " --David Letterman

 

" The president jumped on a plane to start a five-week

vacation. This will be

the longest presidential vacation in 36 years. This

means President Bush has

now been on vacation for 27% of his presidency. That

means the country could

be 27% more screwed up than it already is. " --Jimmy

Kimmel

 

" President Bush is at his ranch in Crawford, Texas,

and here's the good news

-- he says he will only stay until Crawford is

capable of self rule. "

--David Letterman

 

" Bush woke up this morning, saw his shadow and now --

six more weeks of

vacation. " --Jay Leno

 

" President Bush is vacationing in Crawford, Texas. He

will be vacationing

for five weeks. That's a long time. I don't think he

has an exit strategy for

his vacation either. " --David Letterman

 

" Now is a great time for President Bush to go on

vacation because Iraq is

pretty much under control. But a White House

spokesman said Bush is using his

vacation to reconnect with regular people. So you

know what that means -- he's

drinking again. " --David Letterman

 

" After President Bush signed the new transportation

bill, he said it's not

just enough to sign the bill -- people have to show up

and do the work. Then

he went back to his five-week vacation. " --Jay Leno

 

" President Bush still having his five-week vacation.

Today President Bush

announced he is going to leave his ranch in Texas to

visit Idaho for two days.

However, Bush told his supporters, 'Don't worry, I

won't do any work there

either.' " --Conan O'Brien

 

" President Bush is on week three of his marathon

five-week vacation. In

fact, he has been gone on vacation for so long that

today in Washington, a judge

ruled that a young couple with two children can now

legally move into the

White House because it appears to have been abandoned

by its previous tenants. "

--Jay Leno

 

" President Bush is on a five-week vacation. From

what? President Bush,

before he went on vacation, he signed a bill that

will extend daylight savings

another month. He said it proves we're winning the

war on darkness " --David

Letterman

 

" President Bush is now in the second week of his

five-week vacation down

there in Crawford, Texas. He's been taking a lot of

criticism for this long

vacation and his aides say he has his laptop with him

so he can still play

Solitaire and Minesweep -- so it's business as usual. "

--Jay Leno

 

" President Bush is taking his summer vacation. It's a

five-week vacation.

This is his fiftieth vacation in the last five years

-- that's about the

national average isn't it? During his five-week

vacation, he will continue to

receive national security briefings. He won't be

reading them, but he will receive

them. " --David Letterman

 

" President Bush talked tough today. He said he's not

backing out, he's

staying the course for as long as it takes. He's in

it for the long haul. Not Iraq

-- his 5-week vacation. " --Jay Leno

 

" A lot of people are every critical of President Bush

for taking the entire

month of August off for his vacation. But his staff

points out, there's

nothing at the White House he can't do at the ranch

because the ranch is fully

equipped. It's got the treadmill, the weight room, the

jogging path, the big

screen TV, they get Nickelodeon. It's got everything

he would do. " --Jay Leno

 

" President Bush is on a three-week vacation down in

Crawford, Texas, and

it's what they call a working vacation. And staff say

it is an important time

because it's time for him to kick back. And I'm

thinking, when does this guy

kick forward? " --David Letterman

 

" So Congress is on recess and Bush is on vacation --

the town is empty. It's

so lonely in D.C. right now the NRA and the oil lobby

are just giving money

to each other. " --Jay Leno

 

 

_http://politicalhumor.about.com/od/bushjokes/a/bushvacation_p.htm_

 

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