Guest guest Posted December 14, 2001 Report Share Posted December 14, 2001 > > > > If I were Santa > > > > > > > > > > If I were ol' Santa, you know what I'd do > > > > > I'd dump silly gifts that are given to you. > > > > > And deliver some things just inside your front door > > > > > Things you have lost, but treasured before. > > > > > > > > > > I'd give you back all your maidenly vigor, > > > > > And to go along with it, a neat tiny figure. > > > > > Then restore the old color that once graced your hair > > > > > Before rinses and bleaches took residence there. > > > > > > > > > > I'd bring back the shape with which you were gifted, > > > > > So things now suspended need not be uplifted. > > > > > I'd draw in your tummy and smooth down your back > > > > > Till you'd be a dream in those tight fitting slacks. > > > > > > > > > > I'd remove all your wrinkles and leave only one chin, > > > > > So you wouldn't spend hours rubbing grease on your > > > > > skin, > > > > > You'd never have flashes or queer dizzy spells, > > > > > And you wouldn't hear noises like ringing of bells. > > > > > > > > > > No sore aching feet and no corns on your toes, > > > > > No searching for spectacles when they're right on your nose, > > > > > Not a shot would you take in your arm, hip or fanny, > > > > > From a doctor who thinks you're a nervous old granny. > > > > > > > > > > You'd never have a headache, so no pills would you > > > > > take, > > > > > And no heating pad needed since your muscles won't > > > > > ache, > > > > > Yes, if I were Santa you'd never look stupid, > > > > > You'd be a cute little chick with the romance of a > > > > > cupid. > > > > > > > > > > I'd give a lift to your heart when those wolves start > > > > > to whistle > > > > > And the joys of your heart would be light as a thistle. > > > > > > > > > > ! But alas! I'm not Santa,I'm simply just me, > > > > > The matronest of matrons you ever did see, > > > > > I wish I could tell you all the symptoms I've got > > > > > But I'm due at my doctor's for an estrogen shot. > > > > > Even though we've grown older this wish is sincere, > > > > > Merry Christmas to you all and a Happy New Year! > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > _________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 14, 2001 Report Share Posted December 14, 2001 Thank you - echo! Ann - Scotland * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Get your free @ecosse.net account http://www.ecosse.net Scotland's Free Internet Service Provider * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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