OT: Good Advice For Yankees Moving South (Delete now or shuddup) ;-p

[Guest guest]

Yo Marilyn,

 

One more for you since you done come down to Florida from New England.

 

1. Save all yore bacon grease in'a tin can. Ya'll be instructed later on

how to use it.

 

2. If you fergit a Sutherner boy's name, call him " Bubba, JD or LC. "

You got a 75% chance of being rite.

 

3. Just 'cause ya'll can drive on snow and ice don't mean we can. Ya'll

stay home on'em two days when it snows ever year!

 

4. If'n you run your car in a ditch, don't panic. Four good ol' boys in

a four-wheel drive with a 12-pack of beer and a tow chain'll be 'long

shortly. Don't try to hep'em. Just stay out of the way 'cause this is

what they live for.

 

5. Don't git surprised if'n you find movie rentals and fish bait in the

same store.

 

6. Don't buy no food at the movie store.

 

7. If'n it can't be fried in bacon grease, it ain't worth cooking no

how, let alone eating.

 

8. Remember: " Y'all " is singular. " All y'all " is plural. " All y'all's "

is plural possessive.

 

9. Git use'ta hearing, " You ain't from round here, are you? "

 

10. Don't be worried 'cause you don't understand nobody. They don't

understand you neither.

 

11. All that proper talk you learned in school ain't proper no more.

 

12. Be advised: The " He Needed Killin' " defense is still valid here.

 

13. If'n you going to a Suthern funeral, remember, we stay till the

last shovel of dirt been thrown on and the tent done been torn down.

 

14. If'n you hear a Sutherner holler, " Hey, y'all, watch this! " stay

out of his way. Them are likely the last words he'll ever say.

 

15. Most Sutherners don't use no turn signals, and don't pay no 'tention

to them what does. Fact of the matter, if'n you see a signal blinking

on a car with a Suthern license plate, you can bet it was on when the

car was bought.

 

16. Yankees can be identified by all the spit inside their windshield.

That comes fum yelling at the other drivers.

 

17. Satellite dishes are pop'lar in the South. When you buy one it's

proper to stick it directly in front of your trailer, keeping in mind

that the dish cost a heap more than the trailer and should, therefore,

be properly displayed.

 

18. Tornaders and Sutherners going through a deevorce got a lot in

common - sumbody's gonna lose a trailer.

 

19. Florida ain't no Suthern State. There's a heap more Yankees than

Sutherners living there.

 

20. If'n you start cussing the boy driving 15 mph in a 55 mile zone,

driving smack dab in the middle of the road, remember, lots'a folks done

learned to drive on a model of veehicle known as John Deere, and this is

the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.

 

21. Don't never - I mean never - let nobody hear you talking 'bout

Graceland being tacky!

 

Ya'll come back now - ya heah?

 

Bubba Butch http://www.AV-AT.com

[Guest guest]

These two fit for Vermonts Northeast Kingdom, too!!(and probably several

more!)

:-)

Michelle

 

 

> 5. Don't git surprised if'n you find movie rentals and fish bait in the

> same store.

>

> 20. If'n you start cussing the boy driving 15 mph in a 55 mile zone,

> driving smack dab in the middle of the road, remember, lots'a folks done

> learned to drive on a model of veehicle known as John Deere, and this is

> the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.

>

[Guest guest]

Hi everybody:

 

That's me--I drove tractor when I was 14 and learned how to drive a car in

the oat field after the oats had been cut and shocked. Had one heck of a

time learning that I had to push the 'clutch' to the floor before I could

shift. This will really date me but I learned to drive in a 1938 Pontiac.

Had a lot of fun with that car. Could really pack a lot of friends inside

and on the running board. LOL

 

Effie

 

michelle morton- niyama <lakshmi

Tuesday, December 04, 2001 8:32 AM

Re: OT: Good Advice For Yankees Moving South

(Delete now or shuddup) ;-p

 

 

>These two fit for Vermonts Northeast Kingdom, too!!(and probably several

>more!)

>:-)

>Michelle

>

>

>> 5. Don't git surprised if'n you find movie rentals and fish bait in the

>> same store.

>>

>> 20. If'n you start cussing the boy driving 15 mph in a 55 mile zone,

>> driving smack dab in the middle of the road, remember, lots'a folks done

>> learned to drive on a model of veehicle known as John Deere, and this is

>> the proper speed and lane position for the vehicle.

>>

>

>

>

>My Pictures of Aromatic Plants and Exotic Places In Turkey

>http://members.home.net/chrisziggy1/triptoturkey.html

>

>