Guest guest Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 On Feb 19, 2004, at 11:42 PM, Shelby Blakely wrote: > Not to mention, my husband thinks I am going overboard. This is > disappointing to me becasue I want us to be on similar pages about > this and > we are not. He is also overweight, never exercises, eats crap, and > smokes. > It really drives me bonkers. > Are these reasons to consider making our household a two family home? > It is > really driving us apart. > I also want to homeschool and we watch very little tv, and none while > our > son is awake. > I realize this isn't related to herbal remedies, but my natural > lifestyle is > really taking a toll on our relationship and the relationship I have > with > his family. > > Any advice? > How does one raise a son with parents who are so different into a > healthy > human being? > > Shelby, You will find you own truth. If the relationship is good and strong work through it. If it is not you will have to choose. I will share my experience though so you have another's perspective. I am not suggesting you do anything I have chosen though- it is a very personal choice. I am a single mom. I have vastly different values than my ex husband- Jeremy's father. I married with my fingers crossed at 5 months pregnant and moved out when Jeremy was born. It was hard. The worst year of my life was that year. Until I moved. It has not been easy but my life with Jeremy is so good. I am so grateful. I have been so blessed and I am grateful I found the courage to take the steps I have. Yes, it is sad for my son that he does not have two loving married parents. He does not. He has two parents who love him...and express themselves and their values in vastly different ways. I love my life and although it is hard (I am to only real provider) it is better now. Being a single mom is really fine- perhaps not ideal, leaving a relationship when there are children involved is VERY difficult...and the problems don't end since you must still have a child in common- for ever. No one can advise you on such a decision. What I can advise is to take VERY, VERY good care of yourself now and each and every day. Don't lose yourself. Caring for yourself will help you to hear your own wise voice- your spirit, your direction- some call it God, some call it intuition...you will hear your truth as you quiet the inner noise and care for your self. Just trust. I am raising a son who's parents think and feel and do in extremely differently ways and even apart that is an ongoing issue- sadly for my son. I have to trust that he will be ok and I focus on what I can do- letting go of what I can not control..and I do pour my heart and soul into parenting to the best of my ability. I am sorry it is hard. I do understand, Love to you. If you ever want to talk just write me off list. Elizabeth Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 In a message dated 2/20/04 6:24:52 AM US Mountain Standard Time, suziesgoats writes: Pam, and everyone else....this applies to... You must realize that the only one you can change is yourself. It is nice when others change around you... but don't expect it... (this way you don't get hurt)... You take people for what and who they are... No better, No worse... The questions are.... can you live with someone like that? Do they make you feel little about yourself for the way you are? Do they try and make you change or do they accept you for who you are.? My DH and I do mean D H is not into herbal... He's not into drugs either ... And yes he smokes, doesn't drink... Loves his sugar (in tea), straight coffee, Dr. Pepper, salt and meat... and surprisingly he is healthier than most everyone I know. Normal blood pressure, good cholestrol, (had to have a cyst removed on his back that had become infected and burst - now he smokes over a pack a day... the anathesist (Sp) could not believe it as his lungs are perfect.... LOL... he is the exception to the rule.. and always says "IT doesn't matter (to an extent) what you do or eat, God will take you when he wants you... not when you want"... However, he does not stop me from doing what I want to do, he sometimes (in good loving humor) make fun of me and my herbs... especially the garlic up the a....s... BUT the point here is we accept each other the way we are... He is going to build me a greenhouse probably next year (maybe this one)..so I can plant my herbs and veggies... SO, I do try to give him herbs and once in a rare while he takes them... but this is a man who will mentally beat a headache rather than take a drug.. And I slip stuff into food too when I can... hehehe... his meatloaf last nite had carrot/spinach/celery pulp in it... and he didn't say anything... Dont think he knew... Yes, it's hard cooking for two... and sometimes I slip... and that's where my plant enzymes and IC #1 come in... Now my parents and kids... they are kind of into it.... everytime someone has a problem... I bring them something... TT/ech plus, etc. Tell them how much to take and leave it at that... bought the grandbaby organic baby food - now daughter in law buys organic baby food... I guess what I'm trying to say is if they accept you for WHO you are and DON"T try to change you .... you just may have a winner there... Ok that way my "50 cents worth." Suzi Suzi you sure saved me a lot of typing! I agree 100% with you... Couldn't have said it better myself.. God Bless, Jamie in AZ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 20, 2004 Report Share Posted February 20, 2004 Pam, and everyone else....this applies to... You must realize that the only one you can change is yourself. It is nice when others change around you... but don't expect it... (this way you don't get hurt)... You take people for what and who they are... No better, No worse... The questions are.... can you live with someone like that? Do they make you feel little about yourself for the way you are? Do they try and make you change or do they accept you for who you are.? My DH and I do mean D H is not into herbal... He's not into drugs either ... And yes he smokes, doesn't drink... Loves his sugar (in tea), straight coffee, Dr. Pepper, salt and meat... and surprisingly he is healthier than most everyone I know. Normal blood pressure, good cholestrol, (had to have a cyst removed on his back that had become infected and burst - now he smokes over a pack a day... the anathesist (Sp) could not believe it as his lungs are perfect.... LOL... he is the exception to the rule.. and always says "IT doesn't matter (to an extent) what you do or eat, God will take you when he wants you... not when you want"... However, he does not stop me from doing what I want to do, he sometimes (in good loving humor) make fun of me and my herbs... especially the garlic up the a....s... BUT the point here is we accept each other the way we are... He is going to build me a greenhouse probably next year (maybe this one)..so I can plant my herbs and veggies... SO, I do try to give him herbs and once in a rare while he takes them... but this is a man who will mentally beat a headache rather than take a drug.. And I slip stuff into food too when I can... hehehe... his meatloaf last nite had carrot/spinach/celery pulp in it... and he didn't say anything... Dont think he knew... Yes, it's hard cooking for two... and sometimes I slip... and that's where my plant enzymes and IC #1 come in... Now my parents and kids... they are kind of into it.... everytime someone has a problem... I bring them something... TT/ech plus, etc. Tell them how much to take and leave it at that... bought the grandbaby organic baby food - now daughter in law buys organic baby food... I guess what I'm trying to say is if they accept you for WHO you are and DON"T try to change you .... you just may have a winner there... Ok that way my "50 cents worth." SuziPee Tee <peetee1965 wrote: Wow. A couple things: first we had a discussion on Buckwheat which is not a grain but a fruit so you may want to find some recipes and give that a try.Second: I breifly dated a guy that I went to grade/highschool w/ a few times and got to kiss and I really, really enjoyed him, I had butterflies for days. I'm down on it all now because at his house a couple weeks ago some things came out about him. Besides that fact that he smokes and would really like to stop he also takes sleeping pills and antidepressants, has ulcers. He went out on super bowl sunday and got drunk, he likes to drink. I surprised him at his work the day after and he was hung over, headache and took vikadin sp?. He asked me to his house that night I went and that's when he told me about the sleeping pills, the ulcers Hmmm am I missing anything? He told me prior to me walking out the door that he would take a pill and go to bed. Well the whole evening I was internally worried about him and did mention to him earlier that His eye pupils were super small and it was dark in the room, he was having problems focussing on the movie etc. I had read that pupils dialated small are seen in people w/ spinal cord injuries and drug overdoses. He is such a sweet man, he and I got along fabulously. Earlier that evening he wanted to walk over to the store and he spent 70 dollars on Carlesons fish oil, ACV/maple syrup and Vitamin C crystals, apples and a few things he doesn't nor hasn't bought, he eats at restaurants. Anyway when I was putting my coat on and leaving and he mentioned the sleeping pills my eyes welled w/ tears and he saw that it affected me and he knows I live a fairly clean life particularly campared to him. I left that night feeling hurt for him and not for me, I hurt because I liked him alot and still do very much. I am 38 and know how important it is for me to be w/ someone I like to be w/. A few days after this he came down w/ shingles on his face and didn't want to see me but didn't come out and say that. I put together some herbal remedies and we made plans to meet that night. he never called me back and I waited a few days and called him. He was short w/ me in a nice way and I asked him what I did if anything to make him stop calling me. He said no were still friends. It broke my heart and I haven't talked to him now for long enough to know I may never again. His daughter told him one night (he told me) his daughter thought I was too good for him. I don't know who is hurting more right now I just wish he would call because I would take him the way he his because I know he wants to feel good, and all I want now is someone I really like and time takes care of the rest if your patient enough to wait. I don't know which one of us hurts more right now or even if it matters it's really hard being alone at times, I want a good friend, I thought I found one but since I have never had one I don't know what I have truly lost if anything, I won't know and maybe it's for the best.So the moral here is that perhaps there is none. I'm once again scraping my emotions off my bathroom floor. I feel theres nothing more I can do he has pushed me away wether that's what he really wants.It sounds like your man is making the effort w/ you so don't take that for granted maybe you need to reconnect in other ways and the rest will come if you truly like him.PamHey all,I am writing because I know I dance to the beat of a different drum,especially here in KY. I am starting to get a little depressed about it,and it is definitely taking a toll on my (we'll call him husband, however weare not married; we are living together) relationship with my husband. Ihave been vegetarian for years and then I started eating fish. In themeantime, I have had a baby who I decided to quit vaccinating after his fourmonth shots, raise him vegetarian, start seeing homeopaths, chiropractors,naturopaths, etc. We have really started watching what we eat even more.One of the doctor's we see recommends the blood type diet; we are blood typeO. I went to see Dr. Mercola last October and he recommends the MetabolicTyping Diet. We are following a combination of the two. We really have cutdown on breads, unless we are dining out. At home, we only have ezekielbread. I also let him have cereal in the morning, a wheat free cereal. Ineed some more breakfast ideas if anyone has some.According to Mercola, he recommends no grains which eliminates oats,quinoa, kamut, millet, etc. We are finding this kind of difficult.Not to mention, my husband thinks I am going overboard. This isdisappointing to me becasue I want us to be on similar pages about this andwe are not. He is also overweight, never exercises, eats crap, and smokes.It really drives me bonkers.Are these reasons to consider making our household a two family home? It isreally driving us apart.I also want to homeschool and we watch very little tv, and none while ourson is awake.I realize this isn't related to herbal remedies, but my natural lifestyle isreally taking a toll on our relationship and the relationship I have withhis family.Any advice?How does one raise a son with parents who are so different into a healthyhuman being?_______________Store more e-mails with MSN Hotmail Extra Storage – 4 plans to choose from! http://click.atdmt.com/AVE/go/onm00200362ave/direct/01/Federal Law requires that we warn you of the following: 1. Natural methods can sometimes backfire. 2. If you are pregnant, consult your physician before using any natural remedy. 3. The Constitution guarantees you the right to be your own physician and toprescribe for your own health. We are not medical doctors although MDs are welcome to post here as long as they behave themselves. Any opinions put forth by the list members are exactly that, and any person following the advice of anyone posting here does so at their own risk. It is up to you to educate yourself. By accepting advice or products from list members, you are agreeing to be fully responsible for your own health, and hold the List Owner and members free of any liability. Dr. Ian ShillingtonDoctor of NaturopathyDr.IanShillington Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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