Your Daily Smile - New Drugs 4 Women

January 18, 2004

New Drugs for WomenD A M N I T O LTake 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 full hours. E M P T Y N E S T R O G E NSuppository that eliminates melancholy and loneliness by reminding you ofhow awful they were as teenagers and how you couldn't wait till they movedout.P E P T O B I M B OLiquid silicone drink for single women. Two full cups swallowed before anevening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence, and preventsconception.D U M B E R O LWhen taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low IQ, resulting inenjoyment of country music and pickup trucks.F L I P I T O RIncreases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and the urgeto flip off other drivers.M E N I C I L L I NPotent anti-boy-otic for older women. Increases resistance to such lethallines as, "You make me want to be a better person ... Can we get nakednow?"B U Y A G R AInjectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency, duration,and credit limit of spending spree.

ST. M O M M A'S W O R TPlant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering preschoolersunconscious for up to two days.J A C K A S S P I R I NRelieves headache caused by a man who can't remember your birthday,anniversary, or phone number.A N T I-T A L K S I D E N TA spray carried in a purse or wallet to be used on anyone too eager to sharetheir life stories with total strangers in elevators.N A G A M E N TWhen administered to a husband, provides the same irritation level asactually nagging him

Ian "Doc" Shillington N.D.505-772-5889Dr.IanShillington