things to do

[Guest guest]

THINGS TO DO BEFORE THE INAUGURATION

>

> 1. Get that abortion you've always wanted.

>

> 2. Drink a nice clean glass of water.

>

> 3. Cash your social security check.

>

> 4. See a doctor of your own choosing.

>

> 5. Spend quality time with your draft age child/grandchild.

>

> 6. Visit Syria, or any foreign country for that matter.

>

> 7. Get that gas mask you've been putting off buying.

>

> 8. Hoard gasoline.

>

> 10. Borrow books from library before they're banned - Constitutional

> law books, Catcher in the Rye, Harry Potter, Tropic of Cancer, etc.

>

> 11. If you have an idea for an art piece involving a crucifix - do it

> now.

>

> 12. Come out - then go back in - HURRY!

>

> 13. Jam in all the Alzheimer's stem cell research you can.

>

> 14. Stay out late before the curfews start.

>

> 16. Go see Bruce Springsteen before he has his & quot;accident & quot;.

>

> 17. Go see Mount Rushmore before the Reagan addition.

>

> 18. Use the phrase - & quot;you can't do that - this is America & quot;.

>

> 19. If you're white - marry a black person, if you're black - marry a

> white person.

>

> 21. Take a walk in Yosemite, without being hit by a snowmobile or a

> base-jumper.

>

> 22. Enroll your kid in an accelerated art or music class.

>

> 23. Start your school day without a prayer.

>

> 24. Pass on the secrets of evolution to future generations.

>

> 26. Learn French.

>

> 28. Attend a commitment ceremony with your gay friends.

>

> 29. Take a factory tour anywhere in the US.

>

> 30. Try to take photographs of animals on the endangered species list.

>

> 31. Visit Florida before the polar ice caps melt.

>

> 32. Visit Nevada before it becomes radioactive.

>

> 33. Visit Alaska before & quot;The Big Spill & quot;.

>

> 34. Visit Massachusetts while it is still a State.

>

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