Cheap Health

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How to Be Healthy Even If You're Broke

 

Cheap Health

You can approach from either direction: you want to

save money, or you want to be healthy. Or both. This

is shooting from the hip: here is a simple, safe,

cheap and effective plan for eradicating most sickness

in our lifetime.

 

STEP 1: CHEAP, HEALTHY EATING

Follow an unauthorized but NEW AND IMPROVED " Four Food

Groups " :

 

Eat primarily GRAINS, LEGUMES (peas, beans, lentils),

FRUITS and VEGETABLES.

 

Physicians for Responsible Medicine, along with

pediatrician Dr. Benjamin Spock, support this near

vegetarian diet, where all other foods (including meat

and milk) are considered to be condiments for

flavoring. Whole grains (wheat, oats, barley, rice,

etc.) and legumes are CHEAP. They are LOW FAT. They

are GOOD SOURCES OF FIBER. They are GOOD SOURCES OF

VITAMINS AND MINERALS. They TASTE GOOD. They are

EASY TO PREPARE. They will virtually put the food

processing, pharmaceutical, and medical industries OUT

OF BUSINESS. This diet will AUTOMATICALLY PROVIDE

REAL HEALTH CARE REFORM FOR EVERYONE WITHOUT

GOVERNMENT INTERFERENCE OR TAXATION. (After all, there

is not [yet] a tax on lentils.)

 

Fruits and vegetables do all of the above as well. To

save money on your vegetable bill, start a garden. A

few yards of soil and a couple of dollars for seed

produces more veggies than you can eat. The average

gardener puts less than $40 into a vegetable garden.

The average return is way over $500 in fresh produce.

 

The money you save in not buying meat, milk and

medicines will buy a lot of fruit. Want to save even

more? You do not have to live in a warm climate to

grow fruit. Trust me: I live in upstate New York,

right off of Lake Ontario. Just across the lake is

Canada. To one side, Buffalo, NY. To the other side,

Rochester and then Syracuse, NY. Does the word " cold "

mean anything to you? When you hear the words " lake

effect snow " or " blizzard, " think of me. And even I

grow my own fruit.

 

Homeowners, remember that fruit trees give food as

well as shade and beauty. In the cooler climates, try

apple, plum and cherry trees. You can buy specially

tolerant fruit trees that will even grow in Montana or

Maine. As a boy, I remember all the plums and

cherries and apples that we got from nearly wild trees

near our home (and occasionally, I confess, from

neighbor's trees that hung over their fences.) I

never once saw any of those trees get sprayed. You

plant, you water, you wait, you get fruit. I've

planted apple trees from seed and we now have a tree

that produces well. Cost? Nothing. If a botanical

moron such as myself can do this (I got a " C " in Plant

Sciences 201, and was lucky at that), then you

certainly can expect success. No excuses!

 

Apartment dwellers, it's your turn (and homeowners can

still read, too.) " Fruit " does not necessarily mean

" big trees, in a yard the size of Tara. " Tomatoes are

a fruit. So are green peppers and beans, cucumbers

and zucchini. (A " fruit " is any seed-bearing

structure that develops from a flower.) Tomato, bean,

pepper and squash plants need very little space. If

there is any spare corner, try to grow one of these

really hardy food sources. If yard work is out of the

question, try a window box. If that is impossible

(and it rarely is), you can grow sprouted seeds and

sprouted beans in jars by your kitchen sink. OK, so

sprouts aren't fruits (although I have a German

medical article describing sprouts as " grain fruits " ).

Still, the twin goals of cheap fresh food and good

health food are fully met. Sprouted wheat, lentils,

alfalfa and other sprouts are loaded with many fruit

benefits, such as fiber, minerals, and vitamin C.

 

During World War II, rationing made Victory Gardens

popular and necessary. We need them again, now.

Today we are at war with two great enemies: ignorance

and disease. To paraphrase Dickens, beware more of

ignorance, for it is all too often the source of

disease. We need neighborhood Victory Gardens to

overcome sickness and degrading poverty. Once again,

you can come at this for either reason: rich people

still get sick, so they stand to gain the one. The

poor, both.

 

Let's take this argument to the wall, or rather,

behind walls. I taught college courses inside state

prisonsn (no, not as an inmate). You want to know

what you see the most? Sick prisoners, processed

food, and big open yards behind fences. Am I missing

something, or is there an answer here? Those HIV and

TB infected inmates (that now make up nearly half of

the prison population) need FRESH, RAW food. All

inmates need FRESH AIR, especially with crowded

double-decker bunking. They need to WORK to build

their future, their self-respect, and to gain parole.

There is all that OPEN SPACE, behind escape-proof,

deer-proof, woodchuck-proof fences. WHAT A TERRIFIC

PLACE FOR A GARDEN! In the prisons, I saw flower

gardens, trees and lawns. I did not see ANY attempt

at gardening or farming for inmates' food. This costs

taxpayers their money. It costs inmates their health.

Again, approach the issue from either direction and

you win: you either save money, save health, or both.

 

Don't tell me that the state or federal governments

cannot start prison gardens. They can, and it would

SAVE money. Don't tell me that your neighborhood

cannot put aside some land for a community garden.

Hey, for the taxes YOU pay? Sure they can.

 

And you have some space by that kitchen sink for some

sprouting jars.

 

Following this approach to healthful, economical

eating will reduce everyone's food bills, doctor

bills, undertaker bills, and tax bills. Simple eating

saves DOLLAR bills, and lots of them. And who can

measure the value of being healthy? We've been told,

for too long, that the more money you throw at a

problem, the better it will get. Look at what

somebody (you) is spending on our prisons, our

hospitals, our taxes, our prescriptions. If you feel

that you've not gotten your money's worth, then SPEND

LESS. After all, it is about the only approach we

have NOT tried.

 

 

STEP TWO: CHEAP, HEALTHY EXERCISE

 

First, I'd like to interest you in becoming a budget

behemoth through weight training.

 

In case you otherwise normal folks are starting to

page-surf at this point, may I quickly assert that I

am six-feet-four, 195 pounds, and do not in any way

resemble a circus strong man? Gentlemen, I am no

power lifter. Ladies, you do not need to look

anorexic or muscle bound to be fit with weights. This

is all you need to do:

 

1. Put up about $60 and buy the cheapest set of CAST

IRON weights you can. In 1993, I bought a 100 pound

set, including a five-foot bar, for $29.95 at a

discount store. You can even go cheaper, with

sand-filled vinyl weights, but cast iron doesn't

break. (Ever see a " broken " cast iron skillet?)

 

2. Take an old pair of leather gloves and cut the

fingers off. There, you have weight-lifting gloves

(or you can buy a pair for under ten bucks).

 

3. For lifting advice, watch one of those fitness

programs on TV, or borrow a video from your library.

High school and college P.E. teachers are wonderful

(and often no-charge) sources of lifting information.

Me? I ask my brother, and my son. (Talk about cheap!)

 

 

4. Here is their advice, condensed:

 

A. Start with a really small, almost ridiculously easy

amount of weight.

 

B. Do ten to twenty repetitions ( " reps, " if you're

cool) each of curls and squats.

 

CURLS are a bit like drawing both yer six shooters

from their holsters at once. Hold the weight bar in

front of you, knuckles out. The palms can be up or

down; try some each way. Draw the bar up near your

shoulders, slowly, and then let it slowly down.

 

SQUATS, my brother's favorite, involve putting the bar

on your shoulders, behind your neck. Keeping your

back straight, bend your knees and go down. Then

push back up. It is best to have a " spotter "

(stand-by helper) for assistance in lifting the bar

off when you are done. My brother was the puniest

adolescent you've ever seen. Now, after decades of

squats, he can lift enough weight to noticeably bend

the iron weight bar (and he uses a rather thick bar).

 

C. Increase your weight only when you hardly notice

the increase at all. Gradually increase the number of

reps, and slowly add weight week by week. Rest between

sets of each exercise. These steps help eliminate any

chance of injury.

 

D. Do your workout every OTHER day. " Off " days reduce

strain and soreness that might come from overtraining.

We've got time, so take your time. Life is not a

race; you do not win by finishing first!

 

E. It is beneficial to STRETCH before your workout.

Put on some music, too. Whether it is The Rolling

Stones or Bach (both work for me), you will get a good

beat, and you will appreciate how quickly the workout

time passes.

 

F. You can do some PUSH-UPS and some CRUNCHES

(abbreviated sit-ups) every day. Any of the other

calisthenics you learned in 6th grade gym class are

good, too. For these exercises, I recommend music by

The Who.

 

G. WALK, SWIM, DO YOGA to add to your total fitness.

 

What is the best all-around exercise program? The one

you will regularly DO. I have heard a lot of excuses

for NOT exercising, and I don't care about any of

them. There is only one reason to work out, and that

is this: you want to feel (and look) better. Two; two

reasons. Feel better, look better, and lose a few

pounds. Three; three reasons...

 

It is wise to check with your doctor before beginning

any exercise program. Your doctor will probably be

very pleased that you are willing to work at your

health by working out.

 

And eating right. You will save a lot of money doing

both.

 

I saw a bumper sticker the other day that said:

" Ignore your health and it will go away. "

 

Copyright C 1999 and prior years Andrew W. Saul.

From the books QUACK DOCTOR and PAPERBACK CLINIC,

available from Dr. Andrew Saul, Number 8 Van Buren

Street, Holley, New York 14470.